Date: December 16 2022 1:50 PM Title: Chapter 1 - They Pay...A Lot [September 29th, 2005]
Can't understand why this story in being reposted.. BTW some things could have been changed, what about an injection in the ass and the other one in the sole?
Author's Response:
Its being reposted because there were a lot of continuity errors and plot inconsistencies, especially once more R&R content was written.
As I'm going through and addressing these errors, its also a great opportunity to be a little bit more descriptive with the scenes and more adventurous with character interactions.
Injection Therapy will come eventually!
Date: October 27 2022 1:21 AM Title: Chapter 1 - They Pay...A Lot [September 29th, 2005]
Excellent work with more details 👏
I have a question 🤔
Does these women have any sexual pleasure during they keep their subject inside ?
Author's Response:
Thank you!
For your question, I'd point you to the "experiments" that Mrs. Hernandez's daughter Jenn conducts on her mother's subject. ;)
[Report This]Date: October 24 2022 4:10 PM Title: Chapter 1 - They Pay...A Lot [September 29th, 2005]
Did you actually first write this around 2004 as the story suggests? That would be wild
Author's Response:
No, certain events throughout Becca's and the other womens' stories sort of anchors the timeline in this way.
[Report This]Date: October 20 2022 12:57 AM Title: Chapter 1 - They Pay...A Lot [September 29th, 2005]
I read parts of this story in the past, and actually have open tabs of the previous offerings I have been meaning to download. I'll have to download this one in place of the existing Becca story line.
I've always been a big fan of this story and story line. It's one of the best posted here.
Correcting previous story lines to improve the overall continuity of your story is quite commendable; but I have to point out you noted the date and time as "September 29th, 11:17 am" only to continue "had it not been such a hot day for February". Is it September or February? That's the thing about going back to correct a story, little mentions one overlooks.
Keep up the great work.
Author's Response:
Thanks for the kind words! Becca's story stands out as special since it was the first and my most crude attempt at developing the RR universe. I'm looking forward to addressing the continuity errors and spicing things up along the way. Already I've fully developed the participation incentives, which initially were just random dollar amounts, but now there will be a (hopefully not too complicated) three-tiered system. As far as Becca's story goes, there will be a fair more of Krystal in it hopefully, but we'll see.
Thanks for pointing out the month discrepancy. I welcome any/all criticism and callouts, especially if it objectively improves the story!
[Report This]Date: October 18 2022 12:33 PM Title: Chapter 1 - They Pay...A Lot [September 29th, 2005]
Boring, technical stuff
In case anyone other than the author has a copy of the old version and wants to compare old/new version... I believe microsoft word includes something like this, but I don't have it so I don't really know.
You probably want either GNU wdiff (scary command line thingie) or diff, which has the advantage of having many gui programs to help you BUT it's really meant for coding, meaning that it shows differences one LINE at a time; essentially you want to try something like eg meld (meldmerge.org) but to make it work you will have to search&replace so that each sentence is on a single line (ie essentially add a newline after every dot, question mark, exclamation mark)
With the technicalities out of the way... just a couple of quick notes ("couple" as in the relevant xkcd of course):
- jensen/jenson? or is one of them her maiden name? :D
- omfg you just made Krystal and Mrs Jens*n much more interesting, now there's going to be demand for them to become participants!
- "uninformed"... somehow it was right there in the first chapter and I didn't remember it, I need to reread this story more often! :=)
- "so even mrs j" is missing the opening quote (possibly others, I was busy with the diff thingie)
Author's Response:
Thank you for your attention to detail!
Krystal is going to have a much stronger presence in this version going forward!