Date: July 13 2019 8:09 AM Title: ACT III: L'heure fatidique
Wow. I came for the fetish and stayed for the plot. This story was phenominal kept me hooked the whole time. Merphomenee's desire to have a friend but her pride as a goddess preventing that, Summer's desire to be that friend like she was but knowing she would be downgraded to pet. Something that surprises me is that people actually return to the destroyed cities and rebuild them. One would think there would be spiteful types who would deny the goddess satisfaction and obediance, but that's just me.
The ending was a surprise where she actualy came over and destroyed Summer's home and conquered the place. And that tragic ending. At the same time I note that the people's broken spirits made them stop partying and enjoying themselves and merely work like drones for the goddess. It seems that while, Merphomenee enjoyed what the city was before, she destoryed that part of it when she conquered it and made just another tribute slave state.
The defiant part of me wants to see Merphomenee spited in some way, like another god or something burning her capital for fun while she isn't there but I've been watching a lot of attack on titan so maybe not. It would be interesting to see Merphomenee's thought on the matter, like is she completely over her former friend? Does she feel more isolated now that she's done this to her former friend. Will that affect her behavior in the future? And what are her sisters and parents like? It would be funny to me if other gods do have mortal friends while Merphomenee does not simply because their personalities are different.
Author's Response: I find it interesting how differently readers reacted to the way the story concluded and which questions linger in their minds. Many feel strongly about Merphomenee, even though she does not act unlike other giantesses who have embarked on destructive rampages through cities in other stories. Thank you for posting your thoughts and enjoying the story!
[Report This]Date: June 29 2019 3:35 PM Title: ACT III: L'heure fatidique
Beyond what I already said, I would like to ecourage you to write and, should the work meet the criteria (the most basic ones), perhaps post it on Giantessworld. Quality stories are always welcome, even if one needs six whole days after finishing them to gather strength and pen a review (or type, in modern times).
Also, as I cannot officially rate it higher than 10, here it goes.
Author's Response: I have another theme in mind, we will see if it becomes a full-fledged story!
Date: June 29 2019 3:30 PM Title: ACT III: L'heure fatidique
Writing a review for this chapter would present a challenge even if it was not the final one. As it is, the level of difficulty is doubled as it is also the review of the whole story.
Let me start from the easy things. From the technical point of view, there is nothing to complain about and the first person perspective shines here in emphasising the terror of Louelle's citizens. Whilst most of the time the narrator seems distant (which is understandable, given the setting), the destruction of Theraveria's capital is covered in an extremely detailed manner and the camera seems to follow the protagonist in a fluent, continuous motion (understandable and even expected, considering how deeply the most traumatic memories may be rooted in one's mind).
Now we get to the tricky part. It is true, that the resolution of this tale was any reader's guess, the way it did end has, however, always been a possibilty. I will not lie, getting through this chapter was a soul-wrenching experience. To make matters worse, the massacre itself was not the hardest part. Surely, the everpresent pain, death and gore were horrible, but they are an integral part of any war. Even considering the history of human conflicts, life, be it of a man, a woman or a child, is cheap and innocents are rarely spared. What follows a typical conflict, however, is a period of peace. Given enough time, joy once again swells in the hearts. Not in this scenario; what follows is just... emptyness. A void that cannot be filled and an oppression that cannot be overturned by human means. One can even argue, that the dead, the first victims, got the easy way out. And our Protagonist probably got the worst fate: to be there the whole time, witness all the events and live with the blame, forever questioning her choices.
The retospective narrative coupled with time jump at the end, when the system is settled, make the ending one of the most haunting I have ever read. At times it seems as though Summerlyn was speaking from beyond the grave, while telling the readers of her legacy, though it can be assumed she is still alive at that point in time. It is really painful to see her, one who was in direct and intimate contact with divinity, in her twilight years, body deteriorated and withered, an undisputable and final proof of human frailty. In a universe, where humanity was defenseless, she took it upon herself to be its advocate and ultimately she shared the fate of those she tried to protect...
Finally, I have to relate to the structure of the whole story: it bears resemblence to Dante's 'Divine Comedy' (more accurately, its inverse) in more than name. In the first act the Protagonist is experiencing bliss and love; in the second act she sees misery, but one that is not directly connected to her and victims of which believe it serves some higher purpose. Finally, her life takes the most ruinous of possible paths, ending with the promise of bleak and hopeless future. From a narrative point of view though, among the books I read, it is best compared to 'Till we have faces' by C.S. Lewis...
I like to entertain the thought that, at least in this world (as hinted by Merphomenee), death is not the end and other powers exist, and maybe, jest maybe, valiant Summerlyn's journey is not yet complete...
Probably the best story on this site. For better or worse, completely unforgettable.
12/10
Author's Response: 12/10? That is a flattering assessment, and I deeply appreciate the thoughtful review! I think, for me at least, I told the story that I wanted to convey, so I leave poor Summerlyn to her unhappy fate and have nothing else to write concerning her or Merphomenee. I've often kept in mind a word of advice I was given: "Your story is your attempt to convince everyone else that these people are real." Because of this I want to craft stories with memorable characters whom my readers can relate to, love, or pity. But I'm also often hesitant to post my writing, since from what I understand most readers here are only interested in the fetish aspect and would be bored with my long worldbuilding or slow-paced plot. For someone to call my writing completely unforgettable is a response I will cherish. Thank you for always being devoted enough to read and leave me thoughtful feedback!
[Report This]Date: June 23 2019 2:07 PM Title: ACT III: L'heure fatidique
Yep. That was sad. That was very sad. I expected that but I was hoping I would be wrong. Merphomenee didn't even let Marry live. That was rough. I do kinda wonder what the right answer for Summer was. How can you be friends with someone like Merphomenee? I also really wonder if Merphomenee is satisfied with the outcome. Of course she wanted Summer to her own but she also loved her. I wonder if after she ruined Summer if she went home and cried herself. She's regreted mistreating her in the past. It's a shame this story is over. I always looked forward to reading it every sunday. I really hope to see more work from you. You did a great job of capturing the complexities of the relationship of the two and the outcome of this story always felt like it was in question. I never really knew how it would turn out. Solid work!
Author's Response: I'd like to take this time to thank you for being a devoted reader, Ajacks. I will keep your advice in mind about striking a balance with white space and text, and I'm glad you enjoyed my posts week after week! ^^;;
[Report This]Date: June 18 2019 1:26 PM Title: ACT III: Chat et souris
Ajacks has already written a review I can fully back, so I will just describe my feelings while finishing the read, to cite a classic (and do excuse my French - pun intended):
"HOLY SHIT FALLS!"
Author's Response: I hope the next and last chapter exceeds expectations!
[Report This]Date: June 17 2019 10:46 PM Title: ACT III: Chat et souris
Merphomenee makes me sad. She lived her entire existence (thousands of years most likely) alone and finally found a friend. Then she lost her, because of her own actions and she just can't make the changes to get her back. Her treatment of Summerlin in Theraverian was traumatic. Merphomenee made her watch a massacre and in some way be apart of it. That'll mess a person up. Not to mention all of the other stuff like the threats. Merphomenee loves Summerlyn but because of who she is she cant have that reciprocated. On top of that she's clearly done none of the work that would be needed to mend this., and now she's killed friends of Summerlyns, it was going to be hard to walk things back before but now I’m sure it's Impossible. It's just so...sad.
Another great chapter. Throughout this series you've done fantastic work marking Merphomenee really feel like a Goddess. Its not her daunting size that makes her dangerous is also the fact that she can control the weather. She really does feel like a force of nature. They way she haunted Summerlyn was really spooky. The dialogue was great too! I’m really sad story is wrapping up. I’m going to speculate that the next chapter is going to be dark. Merphomenee threatened to destroy Louelle so that's going to be hard to read. I really am hoping that Merphomenee has some kind of a change of heart but if that conversation in her bath after the first rampage we witnessed didn't get through to her i'm pretty sure nothing will. The Goddess of Tragedy indeed.
Author's Response: I knew I wanted to write a tragedy when I started this story, something less uplifting and more somber than my previous writing. Poor Summer and Merphomenee are like a couple whose marriage steadily falls apart, aren't they? ._.
[Report This]Date: June 16 2019 2:17 AM Title: ACT III: La princesse revient
Merphomenee's return was just a matter of time, considering the very first paragraph of the first chapter, but its nature remains unknown. I suspect Summerlyn will be somehow involved, but inviting M out of selfish reasons after sacrificing herself to prevent M's rule seems more than a little out of character. Hmmm...
Author's Response: That is a very good question, how will she return? Chapter eight is up to sate your curiosity!
[Report This]Date: June 09 2019 1:20 PM Title: ACT I: Emissaire de loin
Wow, this story is incredible. The detail in the writing and the emotion this evokes. I’m so excited for the next two chapters. Merophenee is such an interesting goddess. Why did she come back to the place where Summerlyn is? Does she want to rekindle or break her? It will be interesting to see if real change is on the horizon.
Author's Response: Thank you for the response! I hope chapter eight answers all the questions left by chapter seven.
[Report This]Date: June 09 2019 4:24 AM Title: ACT II: La calamité des indésirables
One of the darkest chapters I have read and at times really painful, definitely not a piece of lightweight entertainment. Merphomenee's stance, so devoid of empathy, stands out even on this site, where fate is rarely kind to the powerless. Of course, this is hardly the first massacre on such a scale, but serious tone of the story gives it all the more weight. Vivid descriptions on the other hand create an almoast cinematic effect and make it impssible to stop reading.
The conversation that follows, though completely bloodless, is maybe even more tragic and the most important question it poses (at least in my opinion) reverberates long after the read is finished: to what extent are we willing to change?
Author's Response: I nearly cried several times writing chapter six. u.u Especially when the writing turned from visceral to emotional at the end.
[Report This]Date: May 30 2019 6:34 AM Title: ACT II: Les cadeaux du monde
Sometimes when I read a story, one that presents specific character's point of view, I wonder what makes them special and most fit to tell that particular tale. At times the answer is immediate, The Tragedienne, however, is not such a case. And so I am left with a question: what makes Summerlyn different from other highborn people who came in contact with Merphomenee? She is a princess, but so were many of M's 'pets'; she is eloquent, well-mannerd and bright, but these characteristics are also not unique to her. One might argue her being 'special' is due to her better understanding of the magical nature of the universe (multiverse?), but the existence of other worlds is presumably a common knowledge to the inhabitants of Illyrica and her injury left her a de facto disabled person, unable to perform even the least impressive acts of magic (which, if i remember correctly, is commonly used to solve day to day problems in Illyrica) - making her seem rather pathetic in the eyes of native Illyricans rather than unique.
In spite of being left with questions (or maybe due to it?), I eagerly await next chapters. At this point the plot is difficult to predict and so the story is all the more engaging. Chapter V itself kept up with my expectations and, though lacking in action, was by no means a boring read. Descriptions were as vivid as inprevious chapters (maybe even more so) and the whole experience very immersive.
Criticism: It can't be sunshine and rainbows all the time you say? Personally, I find the usage of real world names of regions slightly unnerving. It does not take anything from the story, but somehow does not fit and breaks the otherwise splendid immersion.
Author's Response: Thank you for expressing your questions! It helps me to hear what my readers wonder as they read through the chapters so I can gauge if I am spinning the impressions I want to leave. Your thoughtful critique is also gratefully received; I will try to keep it in consideration.
Date: May 22 2019 10:34 PM Title: ACT II: Comment j'ai récupéré
I love how you convey the scale of Merphomenee and her palace. The humans seem quite insignificant and helpless. I also like how the goddess alternates between playful and dangerous. She's quite unpredictable and terrifying.
(Oh, also the Tolkien fan in me got a kick out of the reference to mithril.)
Author's Response: Thanks for the response! I hope that my readers will catch all the literary and classical allusions in the story.
[Report This]Date: May 19 2019 6:44 PM Title: ACT II: Comment j'ai récupéré
Another great chapter full of great descriptions and details. It’s very refreshing compared to other stuff on the site. You do a great job at describing Merphomenee as a truly terrifying entity. A force of nature in her own right, one that a lone person cannot hope to fight. The Goddess of Tragedy...yikes. They way she treats the Princess is very interesting, it keeps the reader guessing. I feel very bad for her. She isn't the first princess that Merphomenee has befriended, and she turned Renias home to dust and broke her spirit. She clearly doesn't see humans as anything special. And I’m interested to see what she meant by “...her nature…” and excited to see where this will go.
Also, some other feedback; maybe a little more space from paragraph to paragraph. I’m invested in this story but at a glance I can see how a new reader might be a little intimidated by walls of text. Anyway, great job, looking forward to the rest.
Author's Response: Vibrant description and setting are very important to me as a writer and well-rounded characters who exist as more than just sex objects are too! Hopefully the remaining chapters will explain any lingering questions which tantalize at the moment. I admit that my writing is often dense, so I will experiment with spacing the passages and see if that helps!
Date: May 19 2019 3:09 PM Title: ACT II: Comment j'ai récupéré
Dear Sir/Madam,
regarding your last response, it definitely was not a mistake to post the story here, at the very least you satiated one reader's desire for something entirely different. As a fantasy genres enthusiast, I highly value immersive worlds and multi-dimensional characters one can relate to (though the latter should be present no matter the genres).
Your writing style requires some attention, so The Tragedienne is not the easiest read, however should one be willing to give it a chance, they will be greatly rewarded.
Yours faithfully,
C
Ps. As the story transcends what we came to expect from GTS stories, it should be reflected in the grading, hence 11/10.
Author's Response: You really are too kind! I can only hope that the next chapters continue to meet your expectations!
[Report This]Date: May 16 2019 11:22 PM Title: ACT I: La convocation
Damn. Great story, great chariters and a fantastic and well thoughtout world! What an ending to part three too! I cant wait for the rest! You did a fantastic job of putting doubt into Merohmenee's intentions at the end. Did she kill those men because they tried to hurt her friend or does is she a killer? I love all of this. Cant wait for the other acts!
Author's Response: I'm glad that people appreciate the care in my worldbuilding! Thank you for leaving feedback and I hope you enjoy the rest of the story too!
[Report This]Date: May 12 2019 3:39 PM Title: ACT I: La convocation
Dear Sir/Madam
You have taken a completely different approach to a size related story, one that is focused on worldbuilding and unique storytelling, thus making it feel like a true dark fantasy novel. Each scene, no matter how mundane, is painted meticulously and vividly.
I cannot be the judge of French inserts' correctness, having no eperience with the language whatsoever, but the English part seems really well-crafted (though I am by no means an expert, being a non-native speaker).
Overall, The Tragedienne is a quality read and, given the solid foundation laid in the first three chapters, has the makings of a real masterpiece.
Best regards
C
Author's Response: I admit I was a little hesitant to post my story at first, since I conceived of it as a story with giantess elements rather than a giantess story per se - but reading reviews like this give me encouragement! Thank you very much for your kind words and I hope you enjoy the rest of the tale!
[Report This]Date: May 05 2019 12:48 PM Title: ACT I: Emissaire de loin
Wow, I love the writing style and you are a great author.
The character names I am finding hard to remember although I do love the language being used. Reading your work makes me feel stupid, It's not a bad thing.
Keep it up, I look forward to your next addition!
Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing! Maybe I should have included one of those fiction novel character glossaries, but then that would give away the fun! ^.^
Date: May 04 2019 9:08 AM Title: ACT I: Emissaire de loin
Interesting setting with its French influence. While courtly ettiquette and rituals are not particularly my thing, you are an excellent writer.
I love the idea of her keeping a miniature elephant in her bosom. I'm intrigued to see where this goes and what the goddess is really like.
Author's Response: Heeeeey, it's Pixis!! Thank you very much for the review and response! The story does start off a little slowly since I want to flesh out the setting, but I promise it's worth the time!