[Report This]Date: April 01 2020 7:02 AM Title: Kostas
Oh my goodness, this was a rather powerful read. I can see what you mean about it being possible to read the chapters in either order. Though personally, I'm kind of glad that I read Kostas's chapter first. Because it really set the stage for what was to come. From his perspective it was easy to imagine the world the world as we see it now. With humanit as the dominant species. And the aliens, however large, to be little more than rare inhabitants or guests. The fact that he was something of an outcast among his peers is something that I can certainly identify with. And was rather endearing as you were given a spectacular glimpse into his thoughts. I found myself at once excited and terribly sad for him. Hoping that even some small measure of his fantasies would prove true.
On the other hand, Lennu's chapter illustrated how very limited his perspective was of the world they lived in. And gave rise to a great many mysteries and questions. As it's hinted at that the human town is little more than a walled off colony on this entirely different planet. Leading one to wonder, how the humans got there. And how they are viewed by the wider population of alien species. The fact that for all her incredible size, Lennu was still but a tiny spec in the cosmos, was an incredible but haunting surprise.
The whole thing was woven writen in such a way that it felt very poetic, and made for a very wholesome read. Thank you so much for sharing this!
Date: January 20 2019 5:33 AM Title: Iennu
Really lovely work. I almost don’t really have anything else to say, really. It’s surprising to see a good, short, character-driven PG gentle/fantasy show up here, and very pleasant.
Author's Response:
Thank you so much for the review. It means a lot to get feedback from someone much more experienced. I've been slowly reading through "Julia" and really like it.
Date: January 19 2019 6:49 PM Title: Kostas
I love this, its the best story I've seen on the recent page in a long time!
Author's Response:
Thank you very much for the review, it means a lot.
Date: January 19 2019 4:01 PM Title: Kostas
This is beautiful.
Author's Response:
Thank you for the kind review!
Date: January 19 2019 1:59 PM Title: Iennu
This is really excellent writing. You did a great job world building with lots of little touches that paint a picture of this interstellar society. And you make the reader care about and empathize with the characters. I've felt the kind of futility and frustration that they're going through. It's really sad that Kostas was finally picked up by the object of his affection and never even knew it. I was hoping these two lonely people would become friends by the end of this but I guess that's not to be. In any case, great story!
Author's Response:
Thanks very much for the review!
I started to feel conflicted about the ending as I was writing, and I did consider trying to change it to something less bleak, but I concluded I couldn't make a happy ending work. It would have been a complete departure from the original inspirations, for one thing. A minor idea that I considered, but discarded, was to drop more hints that his dream of being carried at the end was a real memory and not a dream. For example having him notice some minor detail about her appearance, like eye color, being different from previous dreams. I decided that would be too blatant, but I'm wondering whether that was the right call; I was too focused on how many hints I was leaving for the reader and wasn't thinking about leaving hints for the character.