[Report This]Date: September 20 2019 4:38 AM Title: Chapter 1: Small Summer Slip Up
I'm A Little Curious.. About Your Progress
Oh, I liked the last chapter. Is it just me or is Sarah designed to be fucking annoying? However I can’t wait for more dangerous mouth games, stomach trips and (nearly) fatal confusings :D
[Report This]Date: September 14 2019 3:06 PM Title: Chapter 8: Booby trapped
Yeah, one chapter... I just get into it too much and keep going. See http://www.giantessworld.net/viewstory.php?sid=7157 for example.
Date: September 14 2019 7:06 AM Title: Chapter 8: Booby trapped
Nice chapter. I hope Sarah's jaw dropped because of the items on the menu, and that for some reason she can't see Roy. Though I doubt it. At least there is now someone else who might vore him at least. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Author's Response:
Hah! We will just have to see. I will try and get that next chapter up soon!
Thanks for sticking with it 21!
[Report This]Date: September 14 2019 12:14 AM Title: Chapter 8: Booby trapped
Nothing wrong with long chapters. You should see some of the 10k monsters I’ve written!
Author's Response:
Wait 10k as in just one chapter?
Either way Gershwin, that's pretty badass!
Date: September 13 2019 11:47 PM Title: Chapter 8: Booby trapped
Holy crapoli, mama mia, it's back
I thought you had abandoned this story but not only is it BACK (and with many updates in short order) but it's showing real signs of improvement too. The dialogue and descriptions are still good and vivid, bonus points for perfectly describing every diner i've ever been to. I like how your main characters, despite already being best-friends, seem to be getting closer, or rather just more comfortable with their current awkward situation. It's always hard in these sorta stories to write the part where the giantess starts to take the situation a little more lightly, once th shock and stuff has worn off, but you've paced it really well. To that end, the part in the previous chapter where it doesn't occur to her that he can't leave the room very fast while tiny is a good subtle way of making it seem like she's treating this more and more like a normal day with her best-friend.
So glad to have you back, there are not nearly enough "childhood best-friend" shrinking stories on this site, and this is definitely one of the best. Can't wait to see where it's goin, keep it up!
Author's Response:
Hey again Bluegoose! Thank you again for the review. It's always good to see your comments! I utilize so many tools now. Like word counter and spell check.
I hope I can keep the pace up. More soon! Thanks again.
[Report This]Date: September 10 2019 4:39 PM Title: Chapter 1: Small Summer Slip Up
Oh, I can’t wait for Roy to really experience Mimi‘s stomach :D
I hope you’ll be able to write more regularly :)
Author's Response:
Haha! I'll do my best! Thank you for that Mcpb0! ;D
Date: September 08 2019 7:41 AM Title: Chapter 7: Let's get goin
Nice chapter. Is it bad that I hope Roy ends up inside mimi's mouth as she eats, and is actually swallowed(finally)? Looking forward to the next chapter.
Author's Response:
Storyreader, that's not bad at all! Haha!
[Report This]Date: September 08 2019 1:52 AM Title: Chapter 7: Let's get goin
Really enjoying this story. The relationship seems cute and somewhat realistic in it pacing. I look forward to the eventual payoff! I personally hope the eventual vore remains “fun” and not the “killed for a brief moment of pleasure” variety, but it’s your story and I’ll enjoy it either way.
Author's Response:
Thank you so much for that Gershwin! I will continue to do my best with this! I also hope everyone is pleased with the eventual pay off haha!
[Report This]Date: July 02 2019 3:57 PM Title: Chapter 6: Sleeping Slippery Sinkhole
OMG :D Honestly, I thought you'd stopped writing; glad you didn't!
The last chapter is really nice, the indecisiveness; the loss of control when you've gone too far and you can't do anything anymore, the real risk of fatal incidents and the (suggested) complete lack of Mimi's awareness – I mean, if she had swallowed him, the only way to know would be looking in her waste – and then it's too late :P
tl;dr: I love it :)
Author's Response: Hey no worries! I will continue to write. XD I haven't given up yet and neither has Roy. His journey's will continue on. Thanks again for reading Mcpb0!
Date: July 02 2019 9:54 AM Title: Chapter 1: Small Summer Slip Up
Please more.
great story.
I like how it is described in detail.
roy adventures will non fatal ?
I like non fatal.
sorry my English is poor.
Author's Response:
No problem at all Bartek21! There is more story on the way, don't you worry!
Also thank you! I don't like spoiling things so I can't answer questions like that. But I hope you continue to come along for the ride.
[Report This]Date: July 02 2019 6:21 AM Title: Chapter 6: Sleeping Slippery Sinkhole
An excellent continuation. I love the sense of being unsure what he wants. It's a familair feeling - the sense of "I want this" but also the "I don't want to die over a fetish". I hope they to get to have some non-fatal fetish fun, but that's just me. I'll enjoy it wherever it goes.
Author's Response: Thank you so much Gershwin! I am sure a lot of us would struggle with this kind of thing if it were real. Also thank you so much for the review!
[Report This]Date: March 21 2019 6:02 AM Title: Chapter 1: Small Summer Slip Up
Hey, I recently read your story again and I just wanted to say that – if you need some motivation and you’re still on this story – I’m here :D
Author's Response:
Hey Mcpb0! That's super nice of you! I will continuing for sure. This needs an ending. Let me know what you think!
Also this has been very motivating! Thank you. :D
[Report This]Date: December 03 2018 4:58 AM Title: Chapter 5: Can I Be Your Shrimp?
Nice story; you’ve created a really nice pred-prey-relationship here.
I hope your prey will not be invulnerable because IMHO this really kills any tension – but since you’re the author it’s up to you :)
You still want to continue this story, right?
Author's Response:
Roy will find himself in some more troublesome situations for sure. I plan to see this through. There will be more Roy a d Mimi soon I promise.
As for him being invulnerable, I would have to say no he's not actually invincible. However he has already proven he can handle a lot haha!
[Report This]Date: October 07 2018 2:41 PM Title: Chapter 5: Can I Be Your Shrimp?
Excellent stuff, love the close vore action, and his conflicted acceptance. Hope to see more vore action :)
Author's Response:
Hey thanks Gershwin!
Vore is my favorite category so we will definitely be seeing more of that.
Though I have a "Short" story coming out soon for Halloween season. It's gonna have vore and.. other things. ;D
Date: October 06 2018 6:00 AM Title: Chapter 2: Give Us Some Alone Time
Review, part two (rhymes)
Again, very good dialogue. Although there are a couple odd points where contractions might have been more appropriate, at first I just thought it was an intentional choice for the father. The descriptions remain vivid, and you're still painting a really clear picture for the reader.
Excited to read more!
Author's Response:
Oh hello again Bluegoose! Thanks for the part two I really appreciate this. As for my grammatical errors all I can say is I do about 80% of my writing at midnight to 3am! Hahaha. I will try and be a little more clear in the future!
Thank you so much for the review! When it comes to grammer and typos I really appreciate it! I go through my stories twice before uploading but upon my third read I notice so much I missed.
Thanks again. More coming soon.
[Report This]Date: October 06 2018 5:44 AM Title: Chapter 1: Small Summer Slip Up
I'm gonna write this review before I finish reading the rest.
I gotta say, this is a really promising read coming from a new author on the site, the put it bluntly your characters...well, have character. Even the Mom, who only appears ever so briefly, is actually a fun and well written character. The key strength here in my opinion is the dialogue, you've got good banter that seems proportional to a lifelong friendship. Aside from that the standard prose is very descriptive too, lots of vivid description like "she said in a challenging low whisper".
I think I have a bit of a soft spot for this one because I myself grew up with mostly platonic girl friends, especially at this age, so I love these types of stories. I can't wait to see where this goes, keep it up!
Author's Response:
Thanks for the review Bluegoose! I love the banter between characters that are best friends. Having two people be the best of friends in any situation has always been my favorite in television shows and anime.
Thank you! I'll do my best!
Date: October 05 2018 6:58 AM Title: Chapter 5: Can I Be Your Shrimp?
Nice chapter. Kind of disappointed this was only a mouth play chapter, not a vore one, but plenty more chances. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Author's Response:
Indeed! As you said plenty more chances. They still have 11 more days till the vacation is over.
Date: September 30 2018 12:12 AM Title: Chapter 3: Mimi's Mini Mistake
This story is great so far! (As of September 30th 2018) I just really hope to see more soon. Been checking back, can't wait.
Personally, the more vore teasing, the better for sure. Not sure if it's in the plan, but if Sarah ends up finding Roy, vore teasing with her too would be amazing! Have a great night.
Author's Response:
Thank you so much. I try really hard to prolong the vore situations! Though sometimes I am just tempted to let Mimi have Roy! Haha
As for Sarah.. I have big plans for her! She will definitely be making an appearance soon.
You have a good night too buddy!
Date: September 14 2018 6:10 AM Title: Chapter 4: Lets Talk About What Happened.
Really enjoy the story - look forward to seeing it continue
Author's Response:
Thanks!
It's something I fully intend to see through to the end!
[Report This]Date: September 03 2018 4:32 PM Title: Chapter 4: Lets Talk About What Happened.
You’re right. Quite the lengthy chapter. It was written so well that I finished reading it rather quickly.
The whole “huge” and “giant” conversation was kinda annoying. Mimi should be able to understand that this all new to Roy and he is taking in a lot at once. When I first read this, I thought Mimi was genuinely teasing Roy about calling her huge, but she was actually angry which felt somewhat silly. In Roy’s perspective, she is huge. Of course he isn’t talking about her figure. This could have been a comical moment, so I was surprised to see this result in anger in Mimi.
I loved Roy’s description of his “dream”. It’s pretty accurate and a good way of describing a mouth. Used words such as slimy to describe texture, and also when you mention the restriction of movement when things got tighter. Loved it.
There is only one problem with this cliffhanger. I should be scared/nervous of Roy getting eaten, but I’m not. In the end notes, you say it’s still the first day so I know Roy is going to survive and is most likely going to have all his limbs intact. Only thing that might happen is a quick scare, but that’s all. Even if Roy gets swallowed, I don’t fear it. He stated he was invincible so the journey down his best friend might be fun for him.
Otherwise a good chapter. We had back to back mouth and vore stuff so far, and I would love to see other things included.
I can’t wait for the next chapter!
Author's Response:
Thank you again Speedy for your review! I really didn't mind having such a lengthy chapter. It gave me time to add some fan service without it being forced or shoehorned in. The only problem is it takes longer to write. Lol
As for the "Huge" conversation it was indeed meant to be funny. Lol I really do appreciate what you said though. This will help for future chapters and stories.