Date: August 10 2017 8:53 PM Title: Chapter 1: Izzellah
I thought the small comforts idea by real IRS was great. Loved it.
Author's Response:
It was a BAD idea! Small Comforts is horrible! Haven't you been paying attention!? Small Comforts = BAD!!
Date: August 10 2017 5:51 PM Title: Chapter 6: Training Day
I like that Sabrina is taking charge. This will help izzy in the long run. I hope the mother and some teachers or whichever lady comes along gets to hold izzy. I also hope this dr smith eventually shrinks and his female assistant takes over. I enjoy this story a lot.
Later,
Diesel
Author's Response:
Yes....the long run. Her experience with Sabrina will help her in the long run..and that's it. Gloria's featured a bit more than usual next chapter soooo look out for that I guess.
And trust me your not the only one hoping "Doctor" Terrence Smith shrinks and his overworked and unpaid college intern takes over. She'd be writing term papers based on painful experiments he's used as a test subject for by nightfall if I had my way. Alas I don't control the fate of Dr. Terrence Smith. He's actually just a small Erica's house reference. Just like Small Comforts the horribly incompetent products company for shrink victims. Ask realRS what happens to him.
Date: August 10 2017 3:03 PM Title: Chapter 6: Training Day
Oooof, bumming me out. Great chapter, feeling sorry for Izzy and looking forward to seeing where it goes.
Author's Response:
Don't be bummed out. Izzellah had to learn! She was way too full of herself! She's "rough around the edges"....Next chapter will be significantly lighter so you can look forward to that. Gracias for the written input!
[Report This]Date: August 10 2017 1:15 PM Title: Chapter 6: Training Day
Excellent story! Normally, I'm not into cruelty, but I love the way you've presented it here. Sabrina is young. She makes mistakes, but she truly cares for her sister. Izzy on the other hand has a lot of rough edges. Fascinating to watch how you show the mental breakdown, how she eventually submits to her younger sister, accepting her fate for now.
Can't wait for next chapter!
Author's Response:
"rough around the edges?!" You insult young Izzellah my good haunted Mexican foodstuff! She's the example of respect and decorum! To anyone not directly related to her. This is a horrible situation and Sabrina is a monstrous, sugar addicted, spoiled, lucky as sin, brat who's taking advantage of her older sister's vulnerability! How dare you?! "rough around the edges." Such insolence!
Truthfully they're both just trying their best. Wish them luck that this doesn't end horribly for all the Ivorys. Thanks to you for commenting. That's very noble of you. Not insolent at all. Some else wrote that rant above while I wasn't looking!
Author's Response:
"rough around the edges?!" You insult young Izzellah my good haunted Mexican foodstuff! She's the example of respect and decorum! To anyone not directly related to her. This is a horrible situation and Sabrina is a monstrous, sugar addicted, spoiled, lucky as sin, brat who's taking advantage of her older sister's vulnerability! How dare you?! "rough around the edges." Such insolence!
Truthfully they're both just trying their best. Wish them luck that this doesn't end horribly for all the Ivorys. Thanks to you for commenting. That's very noble of you. Not insolent at all. Some else wrote that rant above while I wasn't looking!
Date: August 10 2017 12:20 PM Title: Chapter 6: Training Day
Well if there is a positive to the training is that it has allowed Izzellah and Sabrina to grow closer as siblings than they have been.
Author's Response:
I laughed harder at this comment than I should have. You're not wrong. You. Are. Not. Wrong.....Izzellah would probably hate you. No offense. Thank ya for the comment!
Date: August 10 2017 11:54 AM Title: Chapter 5: Sabrina
Hello! I've actually been a fan of this story since it started, but I never got around to review it! I'm sorry it took so long, but please know that I have LOVED this story!
I really like the dymanic between Sabby and Izzy. In particular I like how Sabby both cares about Izzy, but also loves to use her for her own pleasure and enjoys controlling her. I hope to see this continue. Also, that scene with the ice cream and Sabby's mouth...GREAT! PLEASE have lots more of stuff like that! :)
Author's Response:
Thanks for working up the courage to comment! I appreciate as much as an anonymous author can (which is a considerable yet appropriate amount. Like more than a high five but less than a free lunch.) Although do feel free to skulk in the shadows reading as you see fit with no obligation to make your opinions known. That's YOUR right IamtheWalrus!
Sabrina really likes the dynamic too! Izzellah could take it or leave it (mostly leave it.) There might be a few more fun situations, but not too fun! Peace!
[Report This]Date: August 02 2017 9:34 PM Title: Chapter 5: Sabrina
Great stuff, looking forward to more.
Author's Response:
Great comment, looking forward to more.
Date: August 02 2017 9:27 PM Title: Chapter 1: Izzellah
I don't think Sabrina would mind her Therapist or a Teacher or her Mother handling little izzy for a bit. I get her protectiveness but it wouldn't hurt to show izzy off. It might make izzy more receptive to Sabrina.
Author's Response:
Well take into account ther are certain power dynamics Sabrina can't overcome as a twelve year old girl. You've already seen it. She couldn't stop Ms. Applegate from briefly holding her Izzy or putting her in a cage even though she KNEW it was a bad idea. As much as she insists to the otherwise she can't stop her mom if she wants time with Izzellah either. A therapist would hold somewhat similar authority if one appears in this story. T-h-a-n-k-s. Comments are caring.
Date: August 02 2017 8:27 PM Title: Chapter 1: Izzellah
Will Sabrina's therapist get to hold little izzy?
Later,
Diesel
Author's Response:
Not in front of Sabrina. Not if they want to live.
Later
NotSirk
Date: August 02 2017 8:24 PM Title: Chapter 5: Sabrina
Sabrina's taking charge. Not necessarily a bad thing. Or is it?
Later,
Diesel
Author's Response:
I forgot to respond to this comment! A bad thing? Who knows?
Date: August 02 2017 12:46 PM Title: Chapter 5: Sabrina
i can't wait to read about the training
Author's Response:
Izzellah would disagree with you on that. SHAME! But what you shouldn't be ashamed about is commenting. Thanksies!
Date: August 02 2017 8:51 AM Title: Chapter 5: Sabrina
Man, you're really sparking an itch to get writing again. Big fan of this story.
Love your casual use of terms like "augmented" and "small comfort".
I was thinking about doing a story that inverts our "big sister has to deal with begin dominated by little sister". I'm thinking of a relationship where an older sibling shrinks, and to deal with the big scary world tries to adopt the cute pet role to a reluctant sibling/friend. How would it be if someone like Izzy were the one trying to push the master/pet relationship?
Author's Response:
Hmmmmmmmmmm.....good question. That's actually so unlike Izzellah as I imagine her it's tough?
Okay here's what I'd do. I start by playing up the irresponsibility angle. I'll just use my characters as examples. Sabrina would see the shrink as no big deal, Izzy can take care of herself. Moving her around is annoying, she has friends she wants to hang out with. Izzellah gets abandoned accidentally and has a horrible experience. Maybe nearly dies by an animal or gets used by a human. You decide how dark it gets. She survives and reunites with Sabrina. Now the campaign begins.Izellah starts tagging along in secret. Starts doing small favors for Sabrina. Sabrina's friends like her now. She's a great accessory to have. Her intelligence (Izzy's main advantage) proves useful not just in school but in life. She starts getting invited to parties, her grades go up, she talks mom into A NEW CAAAAR! Whatever.
Sabrina being the uniquely possessive girl I've deemed her eventually forms a connection. Sure theres plenty of skepticism at first, maybe even flatout rejection. Izzellah could never relate to her sister and mistakes are made.....but Sabrina's starting to like her daily foot massage, or tiny hands working hard on a full body rubdown, someone to talk to, to ACTUALLY talk to. Big moment. Sabrina gets in too deep, maybe a boy gets grabby. Izzellah actually saves her! Position secured. Sprinkle some teaching moments in there because Sabrina has absolutely no idea how to care for a tiny and your ready to start.
I don't know if this works or is what you wanted. Feel free to change, add, or ignore all of it. Except for the part about Small Comforts being garbage! That's never not true!! Thanks for the comments. I'll pick em up later.
Date: July 31 2017 11:05 AM Title: Chapter 4: Schooled
Good lord, I thought Erica had become a badass by the end but Sabrina is brutal. Looking forward to seeing if Izza is grateful for the rescue or angry at being put in that situation in the first place.
Author's Response:
Brutal?! Naaaaah. Not sweet little Izzy. What hidden overly possessive dark side? She definitely isn't learning she might slightly enjoy the misery of others or love her new little sis way more than she thought she did! Sweet, innocent, Sabrina will never change. And Izzellah's gonna be happy forever! Oh and I replied to your email....almost a year late apparently. I've been busy, but by the time you read this you've probably already read thar so I don't even know why I'm bothering to type this.....Thanks for the sweet comments. They feed me in the harsh winters of mid summer California!
Date: July 28 2017 2:29 AM Title: Chapter 1: Izzellah
By the way thanks for the compliment on my last reply. If you add Mrs. Nelson that would be cool and well appreciated. She's a redhead and she usually wears tan pumps. I think the heels look great on her. I know that I give details and your the writer but you said if I believe and I do believe. I do appreciate it. I am enjoying your writing style.
Thanks,
Diesel
Author's Response:
What has believing ever actually done for anyone though?! ö_ö I mean now that I know things I can easily just change a name. That's the infinte power I hold as an author! HAHAHAHA! *evil laugh* But I redirect you back to my first sentence. Thanks for doubling down on the comments!
Date: July 28 2017 2:20 AM Title: Chapter 4: Schooled
Fun chapter. I like Ms. Applegate. She is disciplined. I would think that she might keep izzy on her desk sometimes.
The cage was a great idea. Love the hay. A true gerbil experience. Maybe Ms. Applegate should get a padlock that only she knows the combination to.
She will not accept fighting. Punishments all around. I like that izzy doesn't like Ms. Applegate. I doubt that attitude will serve her well.
Sometimes you just write Applegate, she should always be Ms. Applegate. I would assume that a woman of her stature at the school would expect Yes Ma'am as an answer.
This was a fun chapter. Looking forward to Thursday's a lot more now.
Thanks,
Diesel
Author's Response:
Well the idea was that she went from Ms. Applegate to just Applegate cause Izzy was slowly losing respect for her. I try to keep this story in her perspective and add stuff like that. For instance she's clearly addicted to cigarettes. I don't know if this stuff shines through or just makes my writing seem inconsistent though but I'm working on it. Once again I express gratitude at your commenting proclivity!.....I probably shouldn't call her Izzy. She'd slap me.
[Report This]Date: July 27 2017 10:16 PM Title: Chapter 4: Schooled
This story is great, I like how you didn't just jump into the shrink part but had some nice plot building. This Brenda girl seems awesome.
Author's Response:
Brenda's a nice girl. There's a bit of a secret in this chapter that will be hinted a little more next chapter. Brenda's involved in it. Not a big story thing but it'll be a nice surprise if you guess it now. Thanks an substantial amount for commenting.
[Report This]Date: July 27 2017 7:08 PM Title: Chapter 4: Schooled
Loved Erica's House, so I have to read this one! I love the relationship between Sabby and Izzy. Not too much sappy sweetness nor cold indifference. Looking forward to next chapter!
Author's Response:
I don't think you HAVE to read this one. There are soooooo many flaws. Here's one Izzellah says "bullshit" a LOT! It's basically a running joke. But you can keep reading if you want. Thanks for the comment..............................AndwhenareyougonnaupdateYOUTUBE:ELI!!!!...Whoa!...sorry.
Date: July 27 2017 11:57 AM Title: Chapter 4: Schooled
I have a feeling that Sabrina will be in trouble with both the teacher as well as their mother.
Author's Response:
Hrmmm yes. That seems very likely, but here me out. What if this entire chapter was a dream! ö_ö Guess you'll have to read the next chapter to find out! Thanks for taking the time to hand out a comment to a poor story in need!....Spolier: It wasn't a dream.
Date: July 26 2017 6:39 PM Title: Chapter 3: Little Sis.
Very enjoyable chapter. Love that she's scared. Who wouldn't be. Love Gloria's attitude. I am sure her threats and maybe a punishment will ensue.
Will there be a red headed teacher named Mrs. Nelson? That would be cool. Maybe a few Yes Ma'ams to her from tiny izzy. Maybe the teacher could show her to the class or keep her on or in her desk or an old gerbils cage for safety.
Author's Response:
Okay.....you actually kind of predicted something that happens next chapter. Sooo I was going to say this at the end of next chapter but I 'll just say it her now. There's a teacher in next chapter. (Obvious I know)...Her names not Mrs. Nelson sorry. If I hadn't written that chapter over a week ago I might have changed it because that's the kind of anonymous author I am!....but no. Don't give up diesel! Mrs. Nelson will exist if you believe hard enough. Thanks for the continued feedback on this exercise in mediocre storytelling!
Date: July 26 2017 8:32 AM Title: Chapter 1: Izzellah
@Nodqfan
DO IT!
Author's Response:
DO IT! DO IT! GIVE INTO ANONYMOUS PEER PRESSURE!