Date: January 27 2017 4:45 PM Title: A Fresh Perspective
Very Nice! It's a shame that Antistia only grabbed one tiny with her one foot rather than one tiny in each, leaving only one to scamper off.
I do have to ask, since these women(?) poccess some magic, do they end up killing their tinies, or did part of the shrinking spell make them durable and nonparishable? Perhaps Antistia controls them so completely she brings them back to life. Imagine the tiny in her shoe crushed to a dead, bloody, mushy pulp with her every step, only to immediately reform completely healthy and alive again once she lifts her foot up (though he'd probably be stuck more to the bottom of her foot than flopping around loosly beneath in her slipper).
I myself, I'm just speaking for myself, always liked the long, drawn out subjugation to a giantess that not being able to die forces upon tinies. Imagine if Antistia ate a few tinies along with her diner, only she doesn't allow them to die as they pass through her. (Either people are going "EWE!" or "YAA!" after reading that)
Being chained to Turia's boot is pretty hot. It would be neat if when Liam is finally released from her foot that he'd see tinies laced in place within each boot against the tongue inside (perhaps not noticable prior due to only the faintest slither of the flesh of their backs peering out between the eyelet flaps and beneath the laces). Heck, since their knee highs the entire length beneath laces could be lined with helpless tinies.
It would be funny if Antistia and Turia do nasty things occasionally to the tinies in the cages. Maybe spitting at the ones dieing of thirst, flicking an unfortunate onlooker in the head with their giantess fingers, spinning a cage around really fast, putting a cover over a cage and burbing inside of it, sneezing a bunch of snot in one full of desperately starving and dehydrated tinies. And so forth, you get the idea.
Keep up the great work.
Date: January 23 2017 1:52 PM Title: An Introduction
You're off to a really great start. You're story line has so many potential avenues, such as all those little cages hanging from the ceiling no bigger than for a rat or hamster. Perhaps Liam didn't notice when he walked in, his gaze being cast down for the most part, that the cages were all full of tinies, some packed with several. (Just a thought).
If I could make one criticism, loose the word "would" when describing actions. It makes the entire story seem like he's fantasizing rather than it's happening now or in the past.
Can't wait till the next chapter. Great work!
Author's Response:
Thank you for your review kind sir! It is greatly appreciated and I love your idea. That's a wonderful image and just the sort of atmosphere and theme I'd like for Antistia and her lot to have.
Your criticism is noted and appreciated as well. The story is intended to be in the past tense and 'would' can be a handy word to use in certain instances but I have taken your advice into account as I write chapter two and I think you will find it is used significantly less. Hopefully this allows for the story to be more immersive for you and other readers.
Thank you again! Chapter two will be posted either later this afternoon or early tomorrow I hope.