[Report This]Date: July 18 2007 9:20 PM Title: Chapter 1: How I Came To Be
This story was great. This could quite possible be my favorite story on the site. You did a great job. Will there be a sequel anytime soon? It looks like you left the ending to where you could end it there, but at the same time, it leaves the possibility of a sequel.
Author's Response: thanks alot, but a favorite? I think there are better stories out there.
Date: July 01 2007 9:14 AM Title: Chapter 19: The Big Surprise
great story! it keeps getting better
Author's Response: I'm glad you are enjoying it. thanks
Date: May 20 2007 12:50 AM Title: Chapter 1: How I Came To Be
This story is awesome. It keeps getting better and better every time you add to it. I check back here everyday, just to see if you update. Keep up the good work, you rock.
Author's Response: thank you for the feedback. I really appreciate it.
[Report This]Date: April 08 2007 4:42 AM Title: Chapter 11: A Long Sleepless Night (Part two)
Very nice! I enjoyed having him trapped in her nylons. This is a really fun story. Thank you.
[Report This]Date: March 16 2007 10:35 PM Title: Chapter 9: The Game
i like the way the story is going, hope u add more chapters
Author's Response: thanks
[Report This]Date: March 15 2007 9:42 PM Title: Chapter 1: How I Came To Be
Great story. I love the whole thing. You should bring back the woman from the beauty parlor, the woman whose toes he painted. You could bring her back as a punishment for him. But anyways, very good job with this. Please continue.
Author's Response: glad you like it....thanks
[Report This]Date: March 06 2007 4:53 AM Title: Chapter 9: The Game
Good Writing, needs an ending.
Author's Response: I don't know how to end it just yet.
Date: March 04 2007 12:05 AM Title: Chapter 1: How I Came To Be
I really like this story.
[Report This]Date: March 03 2007 10:51 PM Title: Chapter 9: The Game
This has been my favorite chapter by far. I love how despite her being quite evil, the relationship seems to be taking on an understanding. Poor Amber though, she's the kind of girl who other people have to help a bit and unfortunately that kinda girl usually ends up with the kind of guy who takes advantage of her appreciation for everything she's lucky enough to be given. I'm really enjoying this story and hope you continue it. Thank you!
Author's Response: thanks alot. I enjoy reading reviews like this.
[Report This]Date: February 26 2007 4:07 PM Title: Chapter 1: How I Came To Be
Jimmy, this is a great short story! cant wait to read the one your working on ! you are very good at writing, but then i a have a special interest in your stories !
[Report This]Date: January 29 2007 7:22 PM Title: Chapter 7: Working at the Beauty Parlor
Another thing about grammer. AVOID USING ALL CAPS. IF YOU USE ALL CAPS, PEOPLE WILL THINK YOU ARE UNPROFESSIONAL AND THINGS, AS YOU CAN SEE< IT"S VERY BAD. yeah, so, avoid that. Thank you and good story. I likie where this is going. Roxanne looks like a hero, very.
Respond
Zalrus IX
Author's Response: noted....thanks
[Report This]Date: January 26 2007 4:10 PM Title: Chapter 6: Confused, Used, and Abused
Yes! You can be taught! Very very very good improvement, just remember to end the quotations as well, and very good twist. I hope things work out in the end, but I think it will.
Respond
Zalrus IX
Author's Response: I do listen. thanks for the insight.
[Report This]Date: January 26 2007 11:21 AM Title: Chapter 6: Confused, Used, and Abused
I told you she was evil.. i doubt the father will see through her until it's too late for him to do anything to stop her.. and any attempts to expose her by the son will not be believed due to the history the son has with Cindy.. the father will just think that he is trying to get her in trouble out of revenge for turning him in as a pervert.. the best thing the son can do is go on the run in the house.. gather information on Cindy without her knowing.. in his current position she's in total control.. something needs to be done to change the situation.. or she will win.. i'm really enjoying this story as you can tell.. i hope you keep it going..
Author's Response: with reviews like this, I'd hate to end the story. thanks
Date: January 24 2007 4:49 AM Title: Chapter 3: In Cindy’s Care
I'm sorry. Ijust can't stand it. USE QUOTATIONS. We are writing Stories. Stories contain Dialogue Which require Qotations. Just do what you are doing now, but add quotations, otherwise people will not want to read any further. Good story
P.S. please respond to reviews. because if you do, more people will want to. Just look at Nfalc, and SW and others.
Respond
Zalrus IX
Author's Response: I appreciate your input and will do better with my writing in the future. Thanks
Date: January 23 2007 7:58 PM Title: Chapter 5: SPENDING THE NIGHT AT CINDY’S
I still don't trust her, but she is turning into a character that I can see liking. Going after both the father and the son is dangerous. I hope she's ready for the jealousy that is sure to happen when one feels neglected.. I look forward to more. :)
Author's Response: Glad you like the story. More is on the way.
[Report This]Date: January 22 2007 9:45 PM Title: Chapter 1: How I Came To Be
Girls like her are trouble.. I really like how this story is going, but I find myself wondering what kind of control she has on his father to get away with what she does.. It will be interesting to see what happens next, but I really don't like that girl, no matter how seductive and sexy she is, she's still evil and trouble, and I hope the father is able to see through that before someone ends up getting hurt. Thank you for this story!
Date: January 22 2007 3:05 AM Title: Chapter 1: How I Came To Be
Nice start.
Author's Response: thanks. I thought it was a bit drawn out, but I am glad you liked it.