[Report This]Date: January 23 2007 1:54 PM Title: 7:30
So far so good. I like the different point of views here. Can't wait to see all of this develop.
Author's Response: Cool. Just wait until next weekend or so.
[Report This]Date: January 20 2007 8:00 PM Title: 7:30
Cery good. I was wondering what you were doing all this time. However, you switched tenses in the second paragraph (as I said before if you switch tenses a crow will eat your soul). Also theperson change was a bit confusing, but oh well, good stuff nevertheless, good stuff
Respond
Zalrus IX
Author's Response:
Yeah, it's probably bad to switch tenses. I try to avoid it, but it looks like I slipped up.
The change in narrators was meant to be disconcerting. There's going to be another in the next chapter, then it should settle into a fairly regular pattern.
Keep reading!
Date: January 20 2007 1:58 PM Title: 7:00
Too much action, not enough dialogue! :P
(It's a good thing he didn't read my latest....)
Author's Response:
It struck me as a rather cretinous comment as well.
Your latest is excellent, however, "too much dialogue" or not. Thanks for the support, DX.
Date: January 20 2007 3:47 AM Title: 7:00
me to just found your new storie today i like. keep it up can't wate to read more soon good job.
Author's Response: Thanks, angel. You'll probably have to wait a little while to read more, but not too long.
Date: January 19 2007 10:43 PM Title: 7:00
Came across this on your site today, so far so good--I think this should be fun.