Reviewer: Juliet Signed [Report This]
Date: July 30 2015 4:02 AM Title: Lauren's Sock

The story definitely does good in what you intended to do. It's short, a little bit funny, and there's an effort put into making the story erotic. I don't really find it as something I could masturbate to, but another person could.

I like that the interaction between the two girls seems like something that would actually happen. Humorously enough, on a website with giant women and tiny men, the dialogue tends to be the most unrealistic part of the stories here.

As I've said earlier, the story is pretty much perfect for what it's trying to achieve. I just don't find it to be something particularly stellar or ultraerotic.

Reviewer: hunterfury22 Signed [Report This]
Date: March 18 2015 8:36 AM Title: Lauren's Sock

Hey hope you write a follow up to where Ashley gets her revenge on Lauren. Really liked it

Author's Response:

Heh. We'll see :)

Reviewer: Trap Signed [Report This]
Date: March 17 2015 7:31 PM Title: Lauren's Sock

Simple story, but pretty sweet - just how I like it. This really revolves around one of my biggest kinks, so forgive me if I'm really squee-ish over it.

The beginning is absolutely perfect. Just leaps right into the action, and goes through the senses without feeling like a checklist. You definitely know the right elements of a foot/sock to focus on to get people's attention, and the right way to present relations and interactions between characters. Loved Lauren's casualness about the whole business - as the size threads are willing to tell us, math is always sexy. Really emphasized Ashley's position, and contributed to the narrative. The progression between scenes felt very natural, and it was a lot easier to follow than many stories on the same subject, I find. Perfectly encapsulated the fear and claustrophobia of being stuck in a shoe without the confusion.

Still, some bits here and there feel just a tad... Blocky, maybe? "She felt" occurs 3 times in the first 2 paragraphs, and a few other phrases repeat. Similarly, a lot of sentences close together begin with "Ashley" or "Lauren", which isn't bad at all, but just a bit more variety in sentence structure would be nice.

Also - this is not a valid criticism at all, and simply represents personal bias from my own trapped-in-shoe-based kinks - but I wish we could see what happened between the library and home, and a few more notes on the night. But that might've gotten in the way of the short, simple nature of the story - and I'm in no position to complain about story length. This story does the job well.

So, yeah - pretty much spot-on for what it is.

Author's Response:

Yea, I'm fixing it up as I go. I should've edited this a little more thoroughly.

And really, nothing of value happened between the library and the house. I could have gone into more detail but I wanted this to be quality over quantity, you know?

Reviewer: Afroking Signed [Report This]
Date: March 17 2015 3:59 PM Title: Lauren's Sock

wow 1st time ever i got 1st read.... ive been trying for years <8

Author's Response:

grats