Date: September 26 2015 4:30 PM Title: Eric's world shift.
Why the change from 1st to 3rd person? Totally unnecessary in my opinion. But it's your story...
Date: September 26 2015 4:21 PM Title: Eric's "true" nature...
Well that's an interesting turn of events. Why the change? I'm not sure you could brush of police searches that easily though. In reality, I think Cassie would be found out using CCTV footage or something neither of us have thought of.
Date: September 26 2015 4:13 PM Title: Cassie's true nature...
Cassie really is evil. But to know so much about Eric implies there is a reason he shrunk, like she has a condition to him. If that's the case, why is she so evil to him? By the way, I would have liked a little more detsil, but this chapter is mostly good.
Date: September 26 2015 4:03 PM Title: Divine Punishment
Eric can't survive jogging, surely. But he must have done because there are so many chapters after this done. Shouldn't Eric have suffered Stockholm Syndrome by now?
Date: September 26 2015 3:57 PM Title: Cassie's room
How will poor Eric survive? I'll just have find out. So Cassie has a big ego then? Not really surprising.
Date: September 26 2015 3:52 PM Title: It starts...
Is this going to be one of those stories, I wonder, where the writer keeps repeating statements about the main character being average when they in fact are not? First, let me start by saying that start you've provided isn't too bad; I've seen worse. Way worse. However I can't help but feel that this story would have been better with a prologue. You're writing is okay but some parts I found frustrating. And I keep thinking about Nostory's character Cassie from the story Downtrodden stupidly. Although I'm a bit worried about the scat/piss tags I decided to look anyway because you're a new author here; and it's always nice to see new contributors. Plus, I can skip any parts I don't like. But, also, I know lots of people put lots of tags on and then don't use them all so I might not have to worry to much.
[Report This]Date: September 25 2015 6:52 PM Title: Heart to Heart
That was a much needed chapter for me, I was thinking that even if I was in Eric's position. After being raped by her and another woman like a dildo I'd start to doubt my love. Her apologizing without him even asking was sweet. I don't doubt she will continue to dominate him, but it was getting kind of abusive.
[Report This]Date: September 23 2015 10:51 AM Title: It starts...
*Forgot rating*
Date: September 23 2015 10:44 AM Title: It starts...
Great stuff so far!
Though I'm wondering what will happen to all the townsfolk and stuff, and whether or not the situation escalates
Aside from minor nitpicks I can't really find anything to complain about, but then again, I might be slightly biased so take that with a grain of salt.
Author's Response:
That's too far into the plot, yet, there's a lot of stuff you guys dunno yet LOL
Date: September 19 2015 1:07 AM Title: It starts...
Glad to see you back !
Your style is pretty good and it's always enjoyable to read you !
Great stuff, keep it up !
Date: September 18 2015 8:11 PM Title: Eric's world shift.
I love the way you write. Chapter nine is Lusty! <3
[Report This]Date: September 18 2015 2:41 PM Title: PTSD
Wow! What a story! I'm starting to feel a little evil myself.
I think after a that Cassie did, she should put a man inside a balloon, take a piss, and shit inside it, then tie up the balloon, and shake it. I think that's the cruelest punishment I can think of that is somewhat sexy.
I love the emotional aspect of this story and how Eric keeps having second thoughts. It reminds me as a reader, whether or not I should feel bad for those who are punished or if I should cheer for Cassie's sadistic nature.
Good stuff, I can't wait for the next chapter!
[Report This]Date: September 18 2015 2:09 PM Title: It starts...
Write off of the top of your head, and make it extremely sadistic.....your style sounds a lot like mine lol. Loving the story so far!
Author's Response:
Awww, thank you. All of this story is on the fly, just a funny little project I thought I should try out.
[Report This]Date: February 11 2015 8:26 PM Title: The Void
Well,.. this was certainly a strange turn... The simple fantasy, has just turned into a nightmare.
Anyone in Cassies position might become even more evil, given such power over other people,... but, she seems to be concentrating all of her efforts upon Eric. Even her other victims are sacrificed right in-front of him,.. Not to mention, that Cassie even asked Eric for suggestions!
It doe's 'feel' real though, I could see an intelligent female becoming just like Cassie. I've even known some that were just as nice, ( and very pretty) that would probably be even worse...
I like your discriptions,... the inner-thoughts and Eric's narrative interjections that seem to project the full effect of the horrible atmosphere that surrounds him.
Good stuff,... you make it look simple, but,.. I can see that you've put some work into this! I like it! ;`)
Author's Response:
:D
Thank you, I appreciate it! I tried to make it apparent that her focus was, and will be on Eric.
I appreciate the kind words c:
[Report This]Date: February 11 2015 11:18 AM Title: It starts...
I normally don't like stories like these, but the state of our little hero has gotten me interested in this story. Also, I'd personally refuse to eat or drink no matter what if I was in his situation.
Author's Response:
Haha. Yeah. You'd have to kill me, because that's a big no no for me.
[Report This]Date: February 11 2015 10:07 AM Title: It starts...
Oh, I forgot to rate it!
Date: February 11 2015 10:07 AM Title: It starts...
Excellent! :)
I do wonder what's so special about our little hero though, why she keeps him alive. Besides her sister, we haven't seen any other toy.
Author's Response:
That's a secret~