[Report This]Date: September 12 2014 2:02 PM Title: Chapter 5
Heartwretching chapter!
I can totally understand how badly Alani must feel right now! That, combined with her already poor self esteem made her suicidal, but thankfully Lyric snapped her outta it!
And really, it's mostly Carls own fault that happened to him, although part of the blame also falls on Alani for risking it with no Roulean and for being so naive...
I kinda of like the childish naiveness of Alani, but hopefully someone teaches her that being too trusting and kind CAN be a bad thing.
Author's Response:
Indeed! Alani has a lot to learn. And perhaps others could learn a few things from her too. :)
[Report This]Date: September 12 2014 1:37 PM Title: Chapter 5
Well, with Carl hospitalized through his own greed, maybe the truth about the embezzled Rouean (whatever that is) will come out. And, Kenji can get himself a more honest foreman!
Author's Response:
Well, the story is complete. Five chapters, a play on the title perhaps. ;)
I'm considering having it be the first in a series, where each arch is 5 chapters. But I've got some other things I want to write first. :)
[Report This]Date: September 12 2014 1:34 PM Title: Chapter 4
Actually, according to the late Euell Gibbons and other nutrionists, certain conifers are supposed to have just as much Vitamin C as any citrus fruit. But, Carl strikes as having less brains than a newborn baby gibbon!
On a brighter note, I loved the alternating points of view on Kenji and Alani's conversation. If only because it shows that the growing attraction is mutual.
Author's Response:
Lol, too bad oak is a deciduous tree and not a conifer. :) Thanks for the feedback on the pov alternation. I was a bit concerned about that.
Date: September 11 2014 12:54 AM Title: Chapter 1
Welp, digging into this new chapter was interesting, first and foremost because of the unexpected viewpoint shift. I had to back-and-forward to be absolutely sure that I'd clicked on the right story!
Damn, you are a bit of a sadist, aren't you? You seem to almost like shoving your characters through emotional hurt. Not that I mind, but when those pains strike too close to home . . .
Okay, so Kenji indulges himself with pity parties and marijuana. Sounds like about half of the people I knew in high school, except we've some legitimate reason here. Interesting. I'm getting the feeling that, despite Alani's promise, Lyric's going to be finding out about this sooner rather than later. But that's just me.
It is rare that I want to breach the fourth wall. It is even rarer that this is for primarily selfless motives. At this point, though, if I were capable of it, I'd punch through that little barrier, hold my custom-made knife against Carl's throat, and get him to buy five times as much Rouean as he sold off just to present to Alani. Whatever else he may do, starving someone is not okay- there's a reason it's number 3 on the list of the most evil things one can do with a low budget. Asshat.
Anyway, as always, looking forward to the next chapter, and the moment when the hammer falls. Is it bad that I'm gleeful about it?
Author's Response:
Lol, it was a bit distracting for me to switch perspective like that, especially since I didn't make it clear whose head we were in until later. It was an experiment. I doubt I'll ever switch viewpoints when writing in first-person again. If I do, I'll make it more obvious.
Seems that no one likes Carl except Alani. :)
[Report This]Date: September 10 2014 7:03 PM Title: Chapter 4
So, doesn't Alani have any of the Rouean left, or did that freakin' Carl take it all?
Kenji toakin' on the ganja huh? Doesn't sound like he's much of a stoner though...
I wonder if that's homegrown? He should have a pretty good place there on the farm to plot a lil' patch eh? ;)
Why doesn't he just go ahead and get rid of Carl? He already knows that he's an asshole,...so, why trust him with Alani?
Leaving her there under his supervison, is not treating her right at all!
I'd CAN his Ass!
Author's Response:
She has some Rouean (I doubt Carl could have lifted the other two containers by himself). She must be trying to hold out for a few extra days so she doesn't hurt Kenji's finances.
Date: September 10 2014 2:31 PM Title: Chapter 4
uh oh
Author's Response:
Alani's got this all under control, right?
Date: September 09 2014 8:50 PM Title: Chapter 1
Hey, SpookyTaco,
(awesome handle, by the way).
I only stop by here occasionally, but reading your story actually forced me to register so I could make a comment,
The story has great characters and a fun, interesting storyline. It's one of the most original takes on the giantess theme that I've read in some time (and for some reason, I really like that they're reading Charlotte's Web. It seems to fit the story, somehow).
Thanks for this story. I look forward to reading more.
Rainman
Author's Response:
Thanks Rainman! As far as handles go, it's interesting you chose 11311, both an asteroid and a palindromic prime number. :)
Date: September 09 2014 5:46 PM Title: Chapter 4
All 3 of the main characters have their issues and problems. The only one thats prolly doing good right now is Carl from selling that expensive food. But hes screwing over not only Alani but Kenji and Lyric as well since hes practically stealing from them!
Author's Response:
Carl seems to think Alani can eat a few trees and be ok. Not that I'm in any way defending Carl.
[Report This]Date: September 09 2014 5:07 PM Title: Chapter 1
Lyric gets bullied, Kenji is struggling as a student AND as the head of the family, Alani is starving as she got tricked by Carl and I can see her suddenly collapsing as she keeps this to herself.
I really enjoyed the latest chapter, the moment Alani and Kenji shared although whether you're allowed to be in a relationship with a Fyth that isn't master-slave type is another thing. The little bits of world building are always welcome, particulary the part about the tragedy of allowing Fyth to eat trees which led to the decimation of an entire planet.
Kenji is too hard on himself, Lyric won't hate him at all when she gets older. Unless he lets that marijuanna habit get to him, not big on drugs at all but maybe Alani can be his new drug, something to ease his mind.
Keep it up, I look forward to seeing the rest of this story!
Author's Response:
Thanks! I generally deemphasize world building. I write a bunch of stuff out in notes and then force myself NOT to include it in the book until it seems natural. If I encounter more than 2 consecuitive paragraphs of pure world building while reading, I'm asleep, so I try to avoid that in my writing. :)
[Report This]Date: September 08 2014 7:26 AM Title: Chapter 3
Will "absinthe" make her heart grow fonder?*
*Oh, stop groaning! You _know_ that pun was inevitable.
Author's Response:
*Makes mental note to avoid all words that might tempt a pun* ;)
Date: September 06 2014 11:09 PM Title: Chapter 3
This story is awesome, can't wait to read the next chapter!
Author's Response:
Thanks, Dante! More coming soon.
Date: September 06 2014 5:02 PM Title: Chapter 1
Yay!
And I thought storys like this are no longer being written ...
well done so far ...
Author's Response:
Why thank you!
Date: September 06 2014 11:00 AM Title: Chapter 3
:3
Author's Response:
Good to hear from you again. :)
[Report This]Date: September 06 2014 9:58 AM Title: Chapter 3
Yeah, there's a whole lot of smut-storys on the web, but 'Quality-Smut' is really something that's missing lately,
... seems like there used to be a few storys that were 'well written' and they, just skimmed the surface, of crossing from 'R' to 'X'. That seems to be a thing that's just not done anymore. It's either 'Hardcore', or 'G' rated...
I would have figured that you were avoiding the 'naughty' side, just to see if the story could stand on it's own; without adding anything 'smutty' into the recipe. Your ability to create, sometimes amaze's me. You make it look so easy, yet,... I know that you've put some time into the structure of this story.
It will surprise me, if nothing bad happens to Alani. You have portrayed her as this kind-hearted angelic giantess, and she seems to be so giving, (to the point of self sacrifice), I would predict that she'll have some sort of 'Disaster' happen, and she'll need someone to help her...
And, I predict, that Carl will most likely be the culprit?
Ha! Sorry, I just got tired of leaving short reviews!
Author's Response:
Interesting predictions. :)
Date: September 06 2014 7:31 AM Title: Chapter 1
Since you mention Fyth's being expensive and far more expesnive than using machinery, that leads me to two conclusions:
1. He is inexperienced at running a farm so he needs a Fyth, someone who at least has experience since he can't operate any of it well.
2.Seeing as Lyric is his only family, Alani was brought in to ease that and for the first reason.
I am thinking the first of the two is the most likely and well...the second is probably just a development neither of them expected.
Author's Response:
Good thoughts. It's entirely possible that Kenji purchased Alani for more than her ability to help out on the farm. He clearly has a different way of thinking about her and treating her. Is he attracted to her? Or does he feel sorry for her? Or is there some type of an abolitionist movement? We don't know, at least not yet.
[Report This]Date: September 06 2014 6:53 AM Title: Chapter 3
Sounds like that green stuff is the verdant equivalent of moonshine.
Author's Response:
Or absinthe. ;)
Good thing it doesn't make Alani drunk. That wouldn't be pretty.
[Report This]Date: September 05 2014 9:27 PM Title: Chapter 3
The Childhhood innocents, is so fascinating from this perspective. Alana being such a loving indivigual, and the little girl so trusting of her...
Great Stuff!
Carl's got some beer money now. Maybe he'll take his new friend out for a drink?
They could maybe go a catch a movie at the drive-in!
'Attack of the Fifty Foot Farmhand' ;)
***
Just wondering, why did you stop writing the naughty stuff?
Author's Response:
Several reasons. So much of the web is devoted to 'naughty stuff'; I don't see a need to add more. That being said, I'll likely write R-rated material in the future, occassionally, for the sake of realism. Thanks for the review!
Date: September 05 2014 9:26 PM Title: Chapter 1
Oh dear...I don't blame Alani for being tricked by Carl , that bastard better get what's coming to him. Tricking her into giving him her Rouean is a dirty dirty trick to get back at her, she'll starve and Kenji won't know better.
I like the bonding between Lyric and Alani, the two of them would get along so easily.
You mentioned that Fyth are common as most of the farms on the planet can't afford them so it would appear that Kenji's parents left him money that would place him above the average farmer although the farm doesn't seem to be the most stable in terms of finances.
The story itself doesn't seem to be complex at all but it doesn't need to be. I've been looking for a simple but well told story for this for some time and here it is. Hope the rest of the story is just as amazing.
Author's Response:
I think you meant to say 'not common' (at least on Kenji's planet). Kenji had to sell his motorcycle to afford a Alani's food for a month. We don't know how expensive his motorocycle was, nor do we know how much Carl made by selling a container, but we're given the impression paying for Rouean every month can be a substantial expense. Other farmers likely could afford Alani, but by her reasoning, fuel for machines is cheaper.
[Report This]Date: September 05 2014 8:46 PM Title: Chapter 2
So far, this one of the best-written GTS stories ever. I'm rooting for the characters!
Author's Response:
Wow, that's high praise. Thanks, SmallFrye!
Date: September 05 2014 4:42 PM Title: Chapter 3
*points at chapter* CALLED IT!
Ahem. Anyway, I am beginning to feel a little sorry for Alani. At this point it's obvious that she's self-deprecating to the point of holding herself back, and that just . . . reminds me of a friend of mine. I just can't seem to build him up because of how long he's been put down by everyone. He's attempted suicide a few times, he's completely convinced he's utterly worthless, but he's one of the few people I will outright admit is smarter than me. He's creative, talented, and it just hurts seeing him tear himself apart. Alani reminding me of him hurts, because I feel powerless to help.
Now that I've spilled my guts to the Internet, I have to comment on the other elephant in the room: Carl is getting built up as a manipulative asshole, which means that you're going to drop the karma hammer hard.
Can't wait for Chapter 4.
Author's Response:
Lol. I suppose it's somewhat cliche that Alani is illiterate. However, literacy is still a major problem (25% of children in America grow up never learning to read). Not that I'm trying to make a political statement. :)
As for your friend, it sounds like he's depressed. I think that for many people, depression simply doesn't have a 'cure'. I see how you feel powerless. And you're right; you can't fix his problem. However you help simply by being there as a friend. He's shared all that personal info with you, and you still haven't abandoned him; that's what matters.
Sometimes depressed people withdraw. It's hard for them to be around others when in a dark mood (not all the time but sometimes). Other times they don't want to be alone, so it's good you're there as a friend for those times. These opinions are from my own experience since I was diagnosed many years ago (depression affects an estimated 10% of Americans). Take what I say with a grain of salt. Since my diagnosis, I've gotten a lot better, but it's still an illness that can be difficult (sometimes impossible) to shake entirely.
As for Carl, we'll have to see what happens. :)