Date: August 17 2014 5:23 PM Title: Chapter 1
Olá continuo esperando sua publicação em nosso idioma.
Abraço.
Date: June 27 2014 1:25 AM Title: Chapter 1
Ok, LaurieLuv's review was almost a week a go and you haven't made the changes. It was really kind of her to do so yet you don't seem to have taken the concerns into account. Is there a reason for this? I noticed LaurieLuv put a lot of effort into their review.
Author's Response: I'am sorry guys,I have been busy this month,traveling and studying a lot,I will get the stories going on as soon as I can,thanks for all the reviews,they really help and I owe thanks to all
Date: June 21 2014 12:09 AM Title: Chapter 1
Since you're imploring for criticism, I figure I can help. It's good to see that someone is willing to improve. I've copied your text into a google document and will be editing and commenting as I get the time to work on it.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/19aQRNQ3VHZesBTCxwYaBKeySjqw4qXub8ZOYmo50fq4/edit#
I've left comments open on it for viewers if you'd like to respond, or you can always just email me. ^^
Date: June 16 2014 4:07 PM Title: Chapter 1
I like this story so far.
Would like to see some unaware bare skin butt crushes. such as the 2 sisters fine a massive group of solders and have a competion of who can crush the most "ants" under their ass cheeks. or a platoon gets up on the couch and the mother comes in and sits down on the couch with little butt crack showing unaware of them to starts watching tv.