Date: August 19 2013 1:48 AM Title: Trained Pets
There's something stirring about teenagers doing awful things to innocent people. Maybe it's the unsteady balance between a child's natural sadism with an adult's ability to empathize - they can (sometimes, at least) recognize the pain they're inflicting, but simply not care as long as it's pleasurable for them. Maybe it's the perfect example of a person who doesn't deserve any power - an immature, hormonal half-adult - being given absolute reign over human lives. Whatever it is, making her a scene bitch was icing on the cake.
Your story excellently shows the subtle aspects of domination as well. Beyond the obvious condescension and violence, there's also the little things - her giddy casualness toward owning a human being, an Altoids container being an inescapable prison, the overall sense of routine. Usually stories like this pretty quickly become WORSHIP YOUR GODDESS YOU INSECT and other completely ridiculous displays, but this has an at least semi-reasonable sense of progression. There's still some slightly weird lines like ""You can't even start to stand up to my pet, Martha. Do you think you can really do anything I don't want you to?" that make sense, but are a little cheesy, but that pretty much comes with this territory.
The fact that so little is explained - what is a Little, and how did they get that way? who was Martha before she was found? who was Angie? - makes this even better. It gives an overall sense of absurdity that makes the evil even more terrifying and confusing; Martha asks "How? How could anyone..." just like we are. It's a good choice that you're ending it here - anything more and it'd start getting into the usual moral acrobatics that these stories have to do.
Sorry this is really long, but I wanted to express how well done this story is. It's short, satistfying smut that gives the dreaded post-masturbatory "what the hell kind of person am I" feeling that any good sadism story should. Good shit.
Author's Response:
Oh goodness, never apologize for the length of a response. I also find adolescents and young adults to be the most exceptional subjects for this kind of work because I can very clearly recall the energy, passion, conviction and confusion of the age myself. There's less inhibition, more determination and greater disregard for consequence. This was my first completed story that I wrote on my own and I'm glad to come back years later and see it still stands up.
Thank you for your analysis and consideration, I really do always appreciate it.
Date: July 06 2013 2:24 AM Title: Trained Pets
Oh, so it's not an actual long story? That's a real shame, there's tons of incredible and wonderful story opportunities here. It's your choice, but I beg of you to strongly, strongly reconsider this, and instead choose to continue it. If you do, I can see this being absolutely adored by the entire community. The choice is yours, think about it.
And, as always, fantastic tremendous job!
[Report This]Date: July 02 2013 1:03 PM Title: Trained Pets
Great job with the build and the casual attitude that Katie treats her pets with. The disregard for there well being and the devotion that angie showed. Expierencing how katie was angies life it was almost sad to see her die at the end.
Keep up the good work.
Date: July 02 2013 10:06 AM Title: Trained Pets
This... is... incredible!
Please, please continue this! It's not easy to find a story of this genre that's also so well written, so please continue, this was great!!
A couple of questions, if I may ask: exactly how small are the girls captured by Katie? Are they always all the same size when shrunk down? Could Katie actually discover that she could shrink them smaller, and use that as a new form of punishment? Cause that would be awesome!
One last thing is, any chance Katie could have more fun with them barefoot, or is it always going to be with her shoes and/or socks?
Other than that, just please continue, and hopefully soon! Great, great job!
Author's Response:
I have this kind of loosely established world in my mind where Littles exist, and they're just another race of people that are around about an inch in size. I've written some other things referring to them, and they're always about that size. Anything bigger and they're a gross mess to crush, anything smaller and you can't really interact with them. As for socks and shoes, I have a crazy footwear fixation, but I do love feet as well. I'm just much more accustomed to thinking and writing about socks and shoes, since I love them so much.
[Report This]Date: July 02 2013 8:19 AM Title: Trained Pets
Wow, that was messed up, I really got attached to Angie and her will to do ANYTHING to survive...And th fact that she has always been doing right by Katie and then blam, betrayed and mushed in an instant! I guess the fact that she didn't see it coming helps me feel a little better. Im in the same boat as Dann, Im not usually into the killing and torture stuff but I like giving them a try. This was well written and interesting to read so Im looking forward to more of this story from you.
Author's Response:
I'm glad you liked it! This whole story came from the concept for that one moment, and I had a lot of fun writing it. I only just realized that I left it listed as incomplete, but it's very done. I don't think I'll be doing more, but it's possible I might revisit Katie a few years later in life. I haven't really defined the character very well, at least in my mind, so I'm still thinking about her to see where she goes and what she becomes.