Date: October 30 2012 9:29 PM Title: Prologue (Part 1)
This is a great story, but there's one negative that stands out.
For a world crafted so wonderfully, the characters are not.
You don't give the giants a description, it'd help to know WHAT the face that was staring at them looked like. Was she blonde? Brunette? Did she have blue eyes? Was she wearing a dress? Professional attire? Details like that are kind of important if you're essentially describing a colossal figure.
I do like your imagination, though I wish you could describe its contents a little more fully.
Date: October 26 2012 10:17 PM Title: Prologue (Part 1)
My only constructive criticism would be to add more detail. You'll say "She stepped on them with her shoe" but we know nothing about her shoe, what else she's wearing, what height and weight she is... You don't gotta do long division math or spend five pages describing each woman... but a paragraph would be nice. Don't get me wrong, I have an imagination. But it'll make your story much more full if you add some details.
Date: October 23 2012 9:47 PM Title: Prologue (Part 2)
Nice addition. Keep up the good work.
Date: October 17 2012 11:48 PM Title: Prologue (Part 1)
Awesome story. Can't wait to see the next chapter.
[Report This]Date: October 16 2012 12:50 AM Title: Prologue (Part 1)
Very nice intro. Well written and a creative premise. This has alot of promse. I'm intriqued and hope to see more. ...and since everyone is throwing in their two pennies worth...unaware buttcrush? A well-rounded posterior crushing and grinding a settlement or 6 underneath its unconquerable buttocks? and i'm always down for some eatin's...or not, its your story and whatever directions you want to go. Im sure it'll be good anywhich way.
Date: October 15 2012 7:24 PM Title: Prologue (Part 1)
Great start! if like to see it remain unaware. Maybe some vore?
Either way great start
[Report This]Date: October 14 2012 3:45 PM Title: Prologue (Part 1)
A very cool chapter Wholia! I like it a lot!
I know that cleaning ladies usually wear pantyhose with their shoes.. I wonder if any will try to climp them or at least make it to the tops of their massive feet..
But never the less I'm liking what I'm reading so far and you have me vote to continue!