[Report This]Date: May 22 2011 3:04 PM Title: Chapter 13: Sole Survivor
I love the foot torture depictions. I also think the end of the story, if not the brother's life, is near and at hand. I could obviously be mistaken, but feel that even Carly is beginning to realize that there's not much more she can do to destroy her brother's humanity. That said, he seems to be thinking the opposte, that Carly plans only to keep him around as her house-broken, tiny brother-pet. That may be what she's thinking but I guess I'm hoping for the "dark side" to win out, and to do so in the most humilating, painful, and soul-massacering fashion as possible! Thanks again and keep pounding chapters out like a champ!
Author's Response:
indeed, the story is drawing to a close. i have it all typed out, but i thought since this is the end, i'd make the effort to actually read over my stuff this time before posting it. it's not that i'm lazy, i'm just so gut-bustingly busy right now these things would never get out if i editted each and every one. they'll be up soon; thanks for reading.
[Report This]Date: May 22 2011 12:32 PM Title: Chapter 12: The Amazing Human Chewing Gum
just when i thought the story couldnt get any better, you managed to do it.
Author's Response:
a blatant defiance of the laws of quality! haha, i'm just kidding; thanks for your consistent reviews
[Report This]Date: May 22 2011 7:55 AM Title: Chapter 12: The Amazing Human Chewing Gum
Wow that was great, I just love how helpless Jack is in this chapter. Just when I think there isn't anything left to do to this guy. You come up with something awesome like this. Great job.
Dave
Author's Response:
jack may be my personal "fictional character i might consider wanting to die before being"
[Report This]Date: May 21 2011 11:58 PM Title: Chapter 11: Inconvenient Surrealism
Wow what a chapter. I loved it. The double teaming in the dream was awesome.
Author's Response:
I just couldn't resist bringing Jenny back for one last visit
[Report This]Date: May 21 2011 11:35 PM Title: Chapter 10: Tongue Twister
I love how jack is humiliated but feels good in Carly's mouth. It must really be messing with his mind. This was a great chapter.
Dave
Author's Response:
hehe, thanks. my basic, unspoken goal of each chapter seems to be, "how can i screw with jack's mind even more this time?"
[Report This]Date: May 21 2011 11:12 PM Title: Chapter 9: Anatomy Lesson
Wow what a humiliating and original rape scene. I also love that you can write chapters so fast and still have them be so fantastic.
[Report This]Date: May 21 2011 10:15 PM Title: Chapter 11: Inconvenient Surrealism
One really smart thing you've done is write most the story before posting sections of it in separate chunks. I can't say how many authors (me included) have started a story, only to burn out after a few chapters or so. You're lucky these stories have flown so well!
I apprciate you not taking offense to my emphasis on the foot stuff, particularly the smell aspect of it. It's my favorite aspect of this fetish, but excellent writing like yours, makes any size-related domination exciting and fun to read! Now, that said, from some of your characterizations and scenes seem to indicate that Carly's feet pose a deep sense of dreadful aprehension for her brother. She also seems to realize this. Stories like this inspire me to try and finish some of my own tales, currently laying about, collecting dust!
Author's Response:
hey, it's all good, they're your opinions. i certainly can appreciate the foot stuff, perhaps not at the level of depth that you do, but I have enjoyed including a lot of that kind of stuff in the stories to make a cohesive whole with all of it
[Report This]Date: May 21 2011 8:46 PM Title: Chapter 11: Inconvenient Surrealism
I appreciate your consistent chapters. You've got great discipline to shoot new stuff out consistently! I really liked this latest chapter (11), as it's showing how emotionally wrecked he is. I also believe you're near a final conclusion and can honestly say, I have no idea of what will happen!
It seems as though you've probably got a conclusion sorted out at this point, but if you're looking for suggestions, mine is that Carly finish him off in some fashion. While it looks like he's a goner by way of her teeth an/or digestive tract, I'd obviously love to see him forced to endure her feet like in the first part of the first story. Perhaps even have the hellishly pungent stink force him to ejaculate against his will, only to have Carly slowly, agonizingly, and cruely, smush him as she painfully scrunches her toes over him. Now, predicable I may be, but it's just my two cents. You've done a superb job and you should be truly proud of your effort!
Author's Response:
i have got the weirdest working brain; when i try to think of a story, i either get zilch or i get a massive load of random ideas to use. as the latter has been happening in the last week or so, i was able to just toss the chapters out like hotcakes. you are correct, i actually do have a conclusion written out as i write these in quick little spurts of a few chapters at a time, and while your idea is a bit different from how it ends, i think you'll still be pleased with some of the content the end contains
[Report This]Date: May 21 2011 9:44 AM Title: Chapter 8: Sip of Death
story of the year nomination from me!
Author's Response:
aww, you're makin' me blush :) in seriousness, thanks
[Report This]Date: May 21 2011 8:58 AM Title: Chapter 8: Sip of Death
That was awesome. The whole escape from the closet was really exciting. And jack realizing he had to drink sweat from his sister's sock to survive. I loved it. It had to be so degrading for him to realize that.
I'm starting to wonder if Jack should give in to Carly before she really does start to not care about him at all. I think I would have given in by now. But I guess if he did the story would end. I'm not quite ready for that yet. :-) Great job. Keep up the great writing.
Author's Response:
thanks for the wad of five stars you keep giving me, bud. i'm glad you enjoyed that chapter; it was one of my favorites to write, since i really wanted to try and use jack's solitude to let him try and reason out what to do, which i try to make sure i do on occasion throughout the story to keep the "human" connection there, but i of course had to make sure that his mini adventure ended a bit on the unfortunate side :)
Date: May 21 2011 4:11 AM Title: Chapter 1: Painful Aftermath
Just wanted you to know that I added you and your stories. To the favorites part of my account here. Keep up the great work. And thank you for writing such entertaining and fun stories.
Dave
[Report This]Date: May 21 2011 3:19 AM Title: Chapter 7: Carly's Mouth Kitchen
This was an amazing chapter. You are becoming my favorite write on this site. The way you have Carly taking care of Jack but at the same time torturing and humiliating him is fantastic. I hope there ls a lot more to come.
Dave
Author's Response:
i'm flying by the seat of my pants here; as long as i can sit here and think "hmmm... this would work," then there will be more ;)
[Report This]Date: May 20 2011 11:13 PM Title: Chapter 1: Painful Aftermath
Wow, you are such a talented writer! Thank you so much for your work so far in both series, they've been immensely enjoyable. Cheers.
Author's Response:
thank you very much; when you're stuck in a little room surrounded by final exam study material and all your friends are doing the same and the only free time you can have is on the computer, it's a very enjoyable distraction
[Report This]Date: May 20 2011 2:22 PM Title: Chapter 1: Painful Aftermath
I have to say, I'm really enjoying reading your stories. In fact, I only signed you up to leave you this review and thank you for the good work.
Your prose is awesome. Extremely descriptive and I love the way you don't rush into things and just leave the story to develop at the right pace.
Far be it from me to make reqests of you, but I would LOVE it if either in this story or another you delved into an unaware scenario with a slightly smaller (say 1cm tall) protagonist.
How about Carly finding a way to let Jack be "punished" by his mother without her even knowing?
Author's Response:
thanks for taking the time to do that; i'm sure there are lots of other authors who would appreciate your thoughts, as well. and i honestly haven't really thought about where i'm going after this story. i will say, my interests (and thusly, probably best abilities) lie in stories where the girl is aware of the guy, but i'm willing to try other stuff; i'll keep those suggestions in mind
[Report This]Date: May 20 2011 12:49 PM Title: Chapter 1: Painful Aftermath
It's great to see you continuing such a fine story! You're very creative and I'm loving how many degrading things his sister can put him through. I'm also excited to see the forshadowing of utter humilation at the sister's feet again. I think she enjoyed instilling the fear of god into him at first, only to find that her feet were mostly fresh and clean! I don't think he'll be that fortunate again, though! Pehaps he'll be forced to "like" it this time, albeit agains his will. Keep up the good work. I'm really curious as to how you plan to end things!
Author's Response:
hey, thanks for checking in with the sequel. i will say, this one may be a slightly less feet-centric to make room for the countless other methods the character could be using, but hopefully you'll still enjoy what you read
[Report This]Date: May 20 2011 7:44 AM Title: Chapter 4: Kiss My Ass
I loved this chapter. I really like the Carly character. I love how mean and inventive she has been in these stories. You must be having a blast writing her. Keep up the great work.
Dave
Author's Response:
i am having an embarrassingly fun time writing her; honestly, she's based EXTREMELY loosely off of a girl i know who is of course a bit older than Carly, but she has a similar personality: not mean in any way, just kind of pushy, so i have a bit of inspiration there...
[Report This]Date: May 20 2011 2:46 AM Title: Chapter 3: Mistaken Misogyny
Wow I just read the first 3 chapters and I'm loving it. Cant wait to read Jack under Carly's butt.
Author's Response:
glad you liked it; i'm really trying to vary the kinds of ways she tries to get him in this story