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Reviewer: Stubbornstain Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: November 22 2010 2:25 PM Title: Chapter 1 - There are no peanuts on this flight

This looks promising. I hope to see more stories from you in the future and not be discouraged from a lack of reviews. Once thing I will say though is that there seems to be a lot of dialouge and maybe the story could benifit from more decription of the scenery because I'm finding it hard to visualise some areas. But that's a matter of opinion.



Author's Response:

I'll see what I can do about that.

I generally make the scenery a bit too generic, mostly because it tends to pass by quickly (or there isn't anything really notable.) and that I don't like to get bogged down into details about geography (A jungle is a jungle. Lots of trees and rain... or a bunker is cramped and covered in metal and concrete)

When I did roleplays a few months ago, this one guy said I focused a lot on characters rather than anything else really. 

Thanks for your review, it really does help me :)

Reviewer: michaelo Signed [Report This]
Date: November 15 2010 12:36 PM Title: Chapter 1 - There are no peanuts on this flight

We look foward to more chapters of this great story.It is true that very few stories give the smaller characters any chance vs the giantess.Your approach makes the action more exciting and less predictable.Good work!

Author's Response:

Thanks for the review :)

Chapter 2 will come... eventually. My schedule has been busy and in my free time, I'm too busy playing the games that I draw inspiration from to actually write :D

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