[Report This]Date: October 17 2024 10:49 PM Title: Nadia (Soft Vore, optional scat, F/m, optional M/m)
پایان بندی دوم سادیسمی و احمقانه و خلاف انتظار بود و گویا نویسنده نقش خود را با نویسنده یک داستان پلیسی با پایان بندی غیرقابل پیشبینی اشتباه گرفت
Author's Response:
תודה על הביקורת.
[Report This]Date: March 12 2024 12:22 PM Title: Introduction and foundations
I love these stories i have read them many many times. I wish the the tiny would have been eaten in the bltt sandwich, but anyways great work
[Report This]Date: May 06 2023 3:59 PM Title: Nadia (Soft Vore, optional scat, F/m, optional M/m)
Very detailed 👍. There are a few grammar errors though. But other than that it's a good story 🙂.
Author's Response:
Thanks!
Yeah, you're right, English is not my first language and the grammar in my own language works completely different.
I'm glad you could still enjoy this story. I invite you to check my DA page for more content, I'm much more active there.
[Report This]Date: August 20 2022 1:43 PM Title: Coffee Flavored (Soft Vore, F/m)
"By the way, I don't even know if you read those responses, but I feel like it's right writing them anyway. " - I do read your responses. ^^
"Also, the first story ended with the main character being digested (and dead), so I'm not sure how would that continue LOL." Sure Tom is dead, but his devourer Svetlana isn't. Unless she by now shrunk and was eaten too.
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"[...], but natural reasons like genetic or viral shrinking could happen to almost anyone at any given time." - I just realized: Imagine a woman shrinking by genetic predeposition whilst being heavily pregnant... I guess Caeserean Section is no longer the bloodiest way to enter this world...
"Furthermore, if
already bothering making edible clothes, why not make them flavored?" -
Sure, why not as long as the flavor in question isn't "veggie" because
that would make no sense whatsoever. I have read this exact thing (with
tinies considered 'veggie' because they aren't animal meat) before
though. I think it was in a Story of VortexFoodsTM, but don't quote me
on that.
"I bet you would taste great in a BLTT (bacon, lettuce, Tiny, tomato) sandwich!" - It would've been amazing if I read this yesterday, as I had a BLT for Brunch.
"It is you! What are the coincidences?" - Spelling Mistake And I think "What are the odds?" would sound more natural.
"Oh no! Please no!"
"The stomach acids felt tingling on my skin,[...]"
I expected the teacher to pick our protagonist up and just dump him in her coffee on the side, so the whole system concerning at-school shrinking surprised me, but given schools tend to overcomplicate anything on the other hand...
He surely had the worst luck though. Shrinking in the class of a teacher he hates, then narrowly getting away from her by a technicality... Only to end up with (and in) her anyway after all is said and done.Author's Response:
Thank you Avid Reader, I'm glad you enjoyed that too!
- Pregnant shrunken woman- I actually have one story in this collection with a pregnant shrunken woman. I don't remember if I made her shrink before or after getting pregnant, but it's a really cruel story with multiple stuff in it. If you're interested, it is the "Tinies Caviar" one.
- Usually I like to think of tinies as the meat, and have them eaten with veggies. However, I do like to use different approaches in different stories, sometimes having them eaten with meat, sometimes considered as a live animal food (won't be eaten by vegans), and sometimes as legitimate live food (would be eaten by vegans). So it depends on what I felt like writing.
- "What are the coincidences?" LOL I have this problem, even in my own language when I speak. Sometimes there are two ways to say the same thing (or two words even), and my brain haven't decided which one he wants to use, and I end up sayin half and half. In this case I probably mixed up "what are the chances/odds" and "what a coincidence" . This problem gets even worse when I'm speaking, trying to decide between "excellent" and "awesome" and what goes out of my mouth is "awe-xcellent".
- Well, I'm against writing about underage characters if any sex is involved. Tbh, I try to avoid writing about them even when it's just fetish without describing sex or any sexual stuff. However, I had a HUGE fantasy back when I was in school myself, to be (shrunk and) eaten by my teachers. So I try to be very careful when writing about this.
The idea of a teacher dumping him in her coffee on the side is awesome too, but here I tried to go with something a bit new.
- Yes, I like to use cruel narratives a lot, trying to play with giving a false sense of hope, or trying to mislead the reader at first to intensify the evilness of the cruel twist at the end.
On personal note- I like you ideas and thoughts on this world and fantasy, it's always a pleasure to talk to other people about this things, hear new ideas.
By the way- From time to time I try to read again on of my stories, finding out spelling and grammar mistakes and fix them (if I even find them lol). I haven't got to all of them, so some might have more mistakes than others. Apologies.
[Report This]Date: August 18 2022 3:16 PM Title: Ethnic Food 2 (Hard Vore, F/f)
"[...]Are you going to be tiny? Oh if you shrink can I eat you? Please! I really want to swallow you!" " - Emily's initial reaction is a little disturbing.
"After a couple of days, they got used to it." - Spelling Mistakes
"But don't worry, we have Iron Dome system, it shoots down the rockets from the sky." - So Tamara and Emily are in Israel (alias Palestine). So that's why you didn't want to claim out say it.
"But here, even if Emily would have kept her there was still a high chance she would have been confiscated at the airport." - That actually wouldn't be a bad premise either. -> "You cannot take a live tiny onto a Plane. Eat it now, or we will dispose of it." Analog to how bigger containers of let's say Shampoo is handled now.
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I am not necessarily disappointed but surprised. Given this chapter is called "Ethnic Food 2" I expected a direct sequel. Not what it is, yes. But still a good one.
Author's Response:
Hey there! Thanks again for your feedback, I always appreciate it.
By the way, I don't even know if you read those responses, but I feel like it's right writing them anyway.
- Emily's reaction should be kind of disturbing I guess. The general narrative I like to use is cruel, so it's natural when some of the things are a bit disturbing. That being said, it's sometimes very hard to write dialogue with the correct intended tone, it depends a lot on the association that went through the readers mind. In that specific sentence, I meant cynically playful. Some people aren't used to sarcasm so much.
- Misspells - Yes, I'm sorry. I wrote this quit recently, and recently my keyboard is messing up with me. I use MS Word to write, and the spelling correction there isn't 100% mistake proof.
- Yes, I clearly meant Israel (Not Palestine). I would have strictly written "Israel", but I just know some people out there, specially with Arab or Muslim origins, might rule it out and decide they hate the story on the spot. I wanted to make it not so clear at first, and only hinting it so it will be easier for politically sensitive people to put it aside and just enjoy the vore story. If you wish to talk about it more, feel free to send me an Email or we can chat in discord :)
- Surely some skilled people can find a way to smuggle a Tiny on board an airplane. The point here was to briefly tie that end and give an excuse to why Tamara had to be abandoned to her doom. However, it would be a nice concept to see someone trying to smuggle her shrunken friend to a plane, but she end up having to eat him herself or hand him over to be processed and sold on a local food place.
- About the name- Well, it started in my head as a very similar Idea to the first "Ethnic Food". I thought of calling it "Another Ethnic food" or something, but went with #2. Also, the first story ended with the main character being digested (and dead), so I'm not sure how would that continue LOL.
I'm glad you find this one to your liking (at least at some level), and I hope you'll find some of the other ones to your liking too. My greatest hope is to introduce a new concept for someone who haven't thought about it that way before, and will end up liking it.
Date: August 16 2022 10:36 AM Title: Ethnic Food (Hard Vore, F/m, F/f)
"I didn't want to join the "Free the Tinies" movement to not draw any unwanted attention, yet I cringed every time I saw someone from the rival group, especially when they dramatically demonstrate how they think Norms should treat Tinies." - I just realized: Are there PeTA-like organizations on either side of the argument?
"Maybe if I can somehow sneak into the train home I might survive." - Is that supposed to be a "hope" instead of a "home"? Even if, this sentence is just weird.
"It was cramped and diminishing." - I thought Shrunks would be beyond the point of "diminishing"? :P Given this clearly unhygienic storage - Can people with the Tiny Gene contract the Virus and shrink even smaller?
Generally, diseases are a problem with Tinies. Wild Tinies live without actual clothes, proper healthcare, etc. (I sound like an ad for "Farm-bred Tinies"...) Yet there is a reason living livestock fell out of style after refrigeration was widespread. Dead Meat cannot contract diseases... Sure, it can spoil but that's easier to prevent.
"[...]Tinies are being exported to other countries, something about different flavor." - That sounds like utter bogus to me. Wouldn't the Shrunk's stature (fat-height ratio in particular) influence their taste and not their nationality(which is revoked in the moment of Shrinking anyway)? Also, this is never mentioned in Vore Stories, but I would shave the head of the Tinies I am about to consume. Hair is neither tasty nor digestible.
"Above me, there's the face of an eastern European woman in her 50's." A Spelling Mistake again, also a good idea of you to have the pred be a person in their 50ties. Usually, this role is always fulfilled by a beautiful young woman due to... let's call it happenstance.
I like this first short story. The journey of Tom, the Norm with the Shrinking Gene to his final fate as a Shrunk (ingredient) ;) is a good introduction to this world. It gets how much the Norms don't care for Tinies across well.
Author's Response:
Hey there! Thank you very much for this review again!
- About organization like PeTa and such- well it depends on the story. On each story that it is relevant I try to write about it briefly. To be honest in most of the stories I try to focus more on the being eaten part, the background is just "another excuse" to get you there.
- "... sneak into the train home..." No I did not mean "hope", I meant home, as if "the train towards home" or "the train that will take me home". I thought that writing "the train home" is understandable enough. English is not my main language, maybe a native English speaker would write this sentence differently.
- That's the point, shrunken people still see themselves as regular human. They have false hopes that society will treat them equally.
About mixing genes with virus and getting extra small- Maybe, I don't know. If such a thing would have happen it would probably be rare, and the final size will be really small, less than a millimeter, which is hard to find. If such people exist, they would probably just disappear without someone noticing them to actually study the phenomenon.
- Well, people who came from different places in the world are exposed to different foods, different ingredients, different environment. This might cause different flavors when they are shrunk and eaten. Is that actually nuisance? Maybe. Does that stops Norms from eating different Tinies, believing that different race or origin resulting in various tastes? No.
About the hair - LOL. I am bald, and so I usually forget to specify and write that the shrunks hair is sometimes being removed (if processed). Generally, I don't always full describe appearances of characters, so the the reader can imagine them however they like, according the the association that was build in their head.
- As said and mentioned, misspelling and better grammar is something that I try to improve. And yes, I LOVE mature women preds.
Thank you, I'm glad you liked this one.
a279;
Date: August 15 2022 1:45 PM Title: Introduction and foundations
"[...]retard units if you like. – lol, sorry if anyone got offended, it was half a joke." - I am not offended (I am a "metric person" myself after all I find it funny. They are usually referred to as "Imperial Units" albeit the Empire that promoted them is dead, the country where they originated no longer uses them either and the only major country that still uses them is offended whenever someone calls them an Empire. Talk about a, quite fitting, problem with the naming convention.
"The industrial shrinking process is not cheap and not very common accordingly" - That sounds like if you are rich and diagnosed with a 'ticking time bomb' in your genes you could undergo this industrial shrinking process as a precaution to not be shrunk in a potentially life-threatening situation. Maybe you can even learn to cope with it by shrinking in steps instead of all the way down to a few centimeters in height all at once...
"[...]claim they have some ways to lessen the odds of one catching the Shrinking virus or having their genetic condition erupt." - So you thought of this.
". There are also some small organizations that advocate Tinies rights." Simple Spelling Mistake
I don't know if that may already be in one or several of the Short Stories.
As this is my introduction to your world, I don't know whether they already be some, but you should consider writing (a) Multisize Scenario.
If the Society at large sees Shrunken ones as worthless there should be a clear 'I am bigger and therefore more human than you" hacking order in Tiny Farms (if they are a thing), which could lead to interesting interactions. Let's say two 10 cm Shrunks constantly bully a helpless 3cm Tiny and all three of them are sold to a teenage girl who intends to play with them before killing them and giving them to her Mom as simple tiny meat for cooking. I am sure mixed mashed meat may as well have Shrunks in them in this world anyway.
They would probably still retain their unreasonable superiority complex over the 3cm boy but compared to the girl they are just as helpless as he is. And if she realizes that the two bully the tiny one she probably would dislike that and show them comeuppance. Nobody likes bullies no matter the circumstances. Granted, "Mr. Smallest" will probably thank her, but still fully knows that she will eat him anyway.
Author's Response:
Ok WOW!
Thank you very much for this review, it helps a lot! Clearly you are a very interesting person to talk with about shrunken people and vore ideas.
About metric vs imperial units- I'm well aware of that. In fact, as an ex navy man I had to use these units and know them well. few years ago that whole "retard units" thing was a meme, I wrote this introduction a while ago.
Misspelling- Yes you are right. I'm sorry for that, and whenever I read my work again I notice few more, I really try to pay attention to them and I think I'm improving.
About the other ideas and suggestion about the construction of this world- Well, if you go on and read the stories, or just a few of them, you'll see that I develop the world. also, each story might introduce a bit different social construction, with different treatment towards shrunken people.
Your great review makes me think I should rewrite the introduction, make stuff more clear, and maybe cut the parts that might be offensive.
Thank you for this and I hope you'll find some of the stories inside (as chapters) to your liking!