Holy shit. Where do I even start?

-The Situations-

At every step, it felt like you took the hardest way out. Not only were you avoiding the path of least resistance (praiseworthy in and of itself), you were doing the exact opposite. Chapters 9-10 are probably the best examples; having Cathy show up uninvited, her finding Brian, and then not telling her the truth is a hell of situation to put your characters in. The foreshadowing to set up Allison smuggling Brian out was brilliant, too.

-The Subversion-

You definitely fooled me with that first chapter, but even that served a narrative purpose: setting up a status quo to be broken. It would've been easy to start it off cold like that, and just tell us what the status quo is. But no, you set the tone: you're going to show us. We have to see why Brian's case is special.

All the points about taking the hard way also apply here, since I thought, at every point at the end of Chapter 9, "Okay, there's no way he's gonna go there, right?" but then you went there anyway.

Chapter 11 was a very difficult chapter for me, likely by design. I've read punishment scenes like this before without any issue. It's not my cup of tea, but I can read it. But here, I'm really invested in these characters. It sort of feels like karma to the reader, in a weird way, for so easily accepting the violence characters in other stories experience. It was really interesting to see these common fantasies approached from "the other side", so to speak.

-The Writing-

Perfect grammar and spelling is rare enough. But this? I could do literary analysis to this. The repetition of phrases as a rhetorical device is genuinely reminding me of Slaughterhouse-Five in a way, so that's a good sign. Has the sort of black humor and wit, too. Also, you wrote this in less than a month?? How???

-The Characters-

Allison and Brian are both very well fleshed-out, enough to have me digging into my thighs in Chapter 11 waiting for the session to end. Not only do these details give the characters depth, but they're used for narrative purposes as well. The "Weekend" chapters, character development, and emotional journeys would all be impossible without them. Their interactions are lovely, too. I'm pretty sick of the giant/ess just being awful to the tiny, but Allison and Brian's relationship feels reciprocal and friendly. My heart melted into a puddle whenever they were together.

Wow, this got long. Y'know, I don't normally like writing essays. I guess, in summary, you're going above and beyond, doing all of the stuff real books would do. Please continue to write in the future! This was such a breath of fresh air.