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Peter stood by the computer, sipping his morning coffee as he watched Brian work on the movie's website. The last few days had gone remarkably smoothly. They were almost done shooting all the scenes for their movie, for one thing. Not to mention their bank account had just been seriously fattened thanks to all the online advertising deals they signed, so for now, they had more than enough money to feed Meg. And once they were finally done with the movie, the box office revenue and DVD sales would rake in even more. And on top of all that, there was one other thing...something Peter was waiting to rub in Lois's face at just the right time. He even set up the 'Peter Was Right' banner in the living room again. Hopefully the new clown was still alive.

"Well, that's just about all we can do for now. All the advertising banners are in place, and the second teaser trailer is up and ready for download," said Brian as he continued typing away. "However, there's one last thing we need to decide on...."

"And, uh, what's that?" asked Peter.

"We still have yet to decide on a title for this movie," said Brian. "We're almost done shooting, the editing won't take too long...we should decide on a title now."

"Hmmm, I dunno...." mused Peter as he scratched his chin. After a few seconds, though, the answer came to him. "I got it! We'll call it...'Attack of the 100-Foot Meg Griffin!!'" Peter said enthusiastically. Then he noticed the harsh, piercing stare Brian was giving him. "What? You think it's a bad idea for a title?"

"Oh no no. I'm not saying that at all," Brian said quickly. "I'm just struck speechless by the brazen unoriginality of your suggestion," he finished darkly.

As Brian wrapped up the update, Lois walked in. "Ugh, you're working on the movie's website again!?" she asked accusingly. "It's bad enough you're making Meg star in softcore porn without plastering her face on the Internet to promote it."

"Uhh, not to play Devil's advocate or anything, but that website promoting softcore porn is what's going to make sure Meg has food in her stomach for the next few days," Brian pointed out. "Oh, and before you go and start a rant about Peter not caring about how Meg feels, just wait until you see today's front page."

Peter smiled smugly at Lois as Brian said this. The blank, confused look on her face was just golden. All the nagging she had dished out this past week, accusing him of being a lousy father...once she saw today's paper, Lois would be forced to eat her words.

And as fate would have it, Chris had just returned from his morning paper route, and stormed into the room. "Dad, we did it! Check out the front...." he began, but he ended up snagging his foot on the carpet and falling flat on his face. The paper he had been holding flew out of his hand, and was quickly caught by Lois. She unrolled it and gasped when she saw the bold-faced headline that greeted her:

MEG GRIFFIN TO RECEIVE KEYS TO THE CITY AT CITY HALL THIS EVENING

"WHAT!?" she exclaimed, convinced that this had to be some kind of prank. She forced herself to read on. Apparently, Mayor Adam West was willing to risk a backlash from all the citizens still weary of Meg to publicly honor her as a hero for rescuing all those people from that fire. "What the.... I didn't think.... H-How did...." Lois stammered incoherently.

"Well, all that flak about not caring about Meg just got me thinkin', so I pulled a few strings, asked Joe Swanson to get the force to put in a word for her, and before I knew it...." He let the sentence dangle, eyeing the front page himself.

"P-Peter, I don't know what to say. I-I...."

"C'mon, let's go tell Meg," Peter suggested, brushing past Lois, all the while relishing the speechless look on her face. Admit it, Lois, I kept the promise I once made to Meg and made her a superstar. She was about to be honored as a hero, and this movie would make sure they were all filthy rich even after Meg was cured, more than enough to get Meg into any college she wanted. And he had no doubt she'd be the most popular girl in school after this. Never did it occur to Peter that something could - and would - go horribly, horribly wrong....

They all walked out into the backyard, which, of course, was occupied almost entirely by Meg's tent. However, Meg's head was poking out from the entrance to the tent. Not only that, they saw that she wasn't alone. Neil was in the backyard with her, using a hose with a spray nozzle to douse Meg's forehead. For some reason Meg stood still and let him do it, watching him blankly with half-opened, bloodshot eyes as cool water splashed all over her forehead.

"Hey, why the hell are you spraying water on Meg!?" demanded Peter.

"Uh, it's because she asked me to," replied Neil matter-of-factly, looking a little flustered.

"Wait, why the hell would...." Peter began, but was cut off when a deafening moan resounded all around them.

"Ugh, please, keep it down," muttered Meg. Even though it looked like she was merely whispering, it was loud enough to make everyone present grimace and cover their ears. "I've had a splitting headache all morning."

"Well, after what you did yesterday while shooting, it's hardly a surprise," Brian said flatly.


Meg stood in the middle of an intersection in downtown Quahog, right beside a building where a window washer's ledge was set up a few dozen feet above Meg. Cleveland and Quagmire stood on the ledge in window washers' uniforms, and they both looked scared out of their wits.

"OK, now all you guys gotta do is fall off while making it look like an accident, then Meg just catches you," Peter called out to Cleveland and Quagmire, speaking through a megaphone.

"Peter, I don't know how I let you talk me into this!" exclaimed Cleveland. "And I know how it is in these kitsch sci-fi movies...the black guy always dies!"

Meg just listened to their exchange with indifference, just wondering when they could finish shooting and go home. However, she then heard another noise cut over Cleveland's protests...a sort of blasting sound. Meg looked around, and spotted the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man beginning to climb a skyscraper, and the four Ghostbusters stood on the roof, cutting loose with their proton packs and filling the air with the distinct aroma of roasted marshmallows.

Meg walked over to the building, glaring at Stay Puft with a hawk-like intensity. Stay Puft eventually noticed Meg and looked down at her. "What!?" he asked impatiently.

All of a sudden, Meg grabbed Stay Puft, threw him down onto the street and jumped on top of him. The air was then filled with obnoxious chomping and slurping sounds, along with Stay Puft's blood-curdling screams of agony. "AHHH!!! OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!!! THAT'S MY ARM!!! OH GOD, AUGGGHHH!!!"

Globs of marshmallow gunk splattered all over the walls of nearby buildings as Meg continued to devour Stay Puft, and the Ghostbusters just watched blankly as Meg did their job for them. Eventually, Meg had completely cannibalized Stay Puft and simply walked away. Her face and shirt were covered with globs of marshmallow goo, and she licked her lips as she walked away.

The Ghostbusters simply watched as Meg left. Dr. Peter Venkman finally broke the silence. "Would it be horribly inappropriate if I made a joke about...."

"YES!!" cried the other three Ghostbusters in unison.


Meg squinted, trying to get a better look at the headline on the newspaper awkwardly held between her fingers. Even then, she could barely make out the lettering, and there was no hope of reading the rest of the story. For several moments, she just stared at the tiny headline, not sure what to believe, or even think. The pounding headache she was forced to endure didn't help her thought process any, either.

"Well Meg, what d'you think? Daddy said he'd make sure everyone in Quahog would see you for the special girl you are, didn't he?" Peter said jubilantly. Meg flung away the newspaper to look down at her father. She was still lying on her side, so Peter was only a dozen or so feet away from her face. Seeing her family up close like that...somehow, it made them seem ever weaker and punier to her, driving home how freakishly huge she must seem to everyone else. She found it hard to believe enough people in Quahog thought she deserved this honor when she still caused a panic just walking down a street.

"Dad, I don't know. This seems too good to be true," Meg said, voicing her doubts. "Besides Dad...well, don't get me wrong, I appreciate the lengths you went to to do this for me, but spending hours in front of a crowd and getting gawked at isn't exactly my idea of a fun evening."

"Meg, you really shouldn't think of it that way," Lois said. "First of all, like you said, your father went through a lot of trouble to get the mayor to do this."

"And if you ask me, this is the perfect opportunity for everyone to see you for the goddess you truly are, a benevolent protectress watching over the citizens of Quahog," said Neil. Meg instinctively rolled her eyes. She had let Neil hang around her for the last few days because, as much as she hated to admit it, he really had grown on her and she was grateful for the company. But still, his fanatical worshipping of her never ceased to be tiresome. Especially now, when she embodied everything he desired.

Meg looked down at them again, noting the expectant looks on their faces. She didn't want to look ungrateful by refusing to attend this ceremony, but some instinct was telling her it was a bad idea. She desperately wanted to believe enough people in Quahog genuinely felt this way, but her gut told her something else was going on....

"Oh, and did we mention there's free food in it for you?" Brian said suddenly.

"Count me in," said Meg quickly.


Meg had had nagging doubts about this ceremony before, but soon after arriving, what little optimism she had was pretty much gone. It didn't help that, on the way to city hall, the angry curses of disgruntled citizens drifted up to her ears as she carefully made her way through he steer, and she could practically feel the middle-finger salutes behind her back. To make matters worse was that, by noon, grey storm clouds had begun to settle over Quahog, which perfectly punctuated her dismal mood.

However, she knew her mother was right. It would have been wrong to refuse to show up after all the trouble everyone had gone to to set up this ceremony. And so, she sat in front of Quahog's city hall building, where a large stage had been specially constructed just so her little brother and his old band could put on another performance, this time for everyone else who had gathered.

Meg looked down at Chris as he sang, then her gaze slowly drifted to the crowd. She immediately spotted Peter somewhere in the middle of the teeming masses, holding his camcorder and diligently filming everything. Neil stood by him, snapping away with a digital camera. Meg sighed. Fine, snap away if you must, Meg thought. But if I catch any of those photos on those websites you were talking about, your family'll have to scrape what's left of you off of my sneaker. At times, Meg noticed how other people would gawk at her, but when they realized she spotted them, they would instantly direct their attention to the stage, pretending to be interested in the performance.

If that were the only problem - being stared at as if she were some monument - then perhaps this ceremony wouldn't have bothered Meg so much. Unfortunately, there were more reminders of how unwelcome she now was in Quahog. All around the front of city hall, the police were deployed and cordoned off the area, beyond which many protesters had gathered, waving signs that she couldn't make out, but knew they didn't say anything inviting. The cops were the only thing keeping those protesters from storming in and ruining everything.

Except maybe their fear of me, Meg realized glumly. It was still depressing, being thought of as a menace after saving those people from that fire. Meg tried to put it in the back of her mind as she reached into a huge portable pool filled with thousands of chocolate chip muffins, baked especially for her. Meg gobbled down another mouthful. They had an odd taste, but Meg thought little of it and kept listening to the band.

At last, Chris's band had finished their encore, and it was time to get on with the ceremony. Good thing, too. It looks like it'll start raining any minute, she thought, looking up at the dismal grey sky. As Chris and his friends gathered up their instruments and equipment, Mayor Adam West walked onto the stage.

"Good afternoon, citizens of Quahog," said Mayor West, speaking into the microphone. "Today we are gathered here to pay tribute to one special individual who walks among us...."

And has nearly stepped on a few people in the process, Meg added silently, shaking her head as the mayor continued with his speech. Let's just get this over with....

"She is someone who is constantly watching over us, like Gamera, ready to use her gaseous emissions to propel her way to wherever there's trouble," said Mayor West, prompting Meg to clutch her legs close to her and bury her face in her knees. "And she will tower over those who would do us harm, like one of those summoned creatures in a role-playing game, which of course have summoning animations lasting several minutes, giving you ample time to go get yourself some creamed corn...."

I can't believe I once worked for this guy, Meg thought acidly, conveniently forgetting that she once did more than just work for Adam West as an intern.

Eventually, Mayor West wrapped up his verbose, nonsensical speech, getting to the only part Meg cared about: getting that damn key and leaving. "And now, with out further ado, for an act of unselfish heroism, I proudly present this key to the city." The mayor turned around and looked up at Meg, motioning for her to lower her hand. Meg complied wordlessly, and the mayor deposited the golden key in the palm of her hand.

Meg stared at the key intently; it was so small, it almost blended in with the rest of her palm. Well, I finally got it. Now I can....

"However, before we all leave, we should close with some parting words from our local hero!" the mayor suddenly added.

"Huh!?" Meg blurted out, not sure that she heard right. She looked down at the mayor, but from what she could tell, his face betrayed a seriousness about making her say something. Meg hadn't counted on this. She thought she merely had to show up for the sake of courtesy, accept the key, then leave so she could sulk in her depression some more. What was she supposed to say? She scanned the the crowd, noting everyone's curious, expectant faces. "Well, I, er.... That is, I, uhhhh...." An odd tingling sensation in her lips and the back of her throat suddenly distracted her, but truthfully, she was at a loss for what to say anyway. Oh God, I'll never wish to be a superstar and the center of attention ever again, Meg silently vowed as she felt the weight of all those stares.


Meanwhile, Peter continued to film Meg, eagerly anticipating what she was going to say and completely oblivious to her uneasiness. "Oh, this'll be great for the DVD extras," he said.

"Peter, enough already," said Lois. "Can't you see how nervous she is...and come to think of it, doesn't Meg look a little pale to you?"

Peter absentmindedly took note of how pallid Meg suddenly looked, but thought little of it as he kept his camcorder aimed up at Meg. "Come on, Meg. Say something," he muttered under his breath.

Meg's lips parted slightly, but her words seemed to be caught in her throat. But just when it looked like she was finally about to speak, a strange sound rang out...something that sounded vaguely like a catpult being fired. A second later, what looked like a garbage bag soared through the air, headed right for Meg. It collided with the side of her head, and what looked like pink paint splashed all over her face. Meg cried out in shock, instinctively reaching for her face. She stared blankly at the pink paint that oozed all over her fingers. Then, more paint-filled garbage bags following, and soon Meg was covered with several colors of paint.

"Hey, I didn't know Mayor West was gonna do this," said Peter stupidly, assuming this all part of the ceremony. "What's this supposed to be like, dousing the coach at the end of a football game or something?"

"No, you idiot!" snapped Lois irascibly. "Someone must've thought it would've been a real gas to prank Meg right when she got the keys to the city!" she shrieked, enraged that what was supposed to be a special day for Meg was ruined.

"And I think I might know who," Brian added sourly.


Meg just stood there, mortified and paralyzed with shock as the paint trickled down all over her. Who had done this!? She knew plenty of people were still weary of her, but to go out of their way - and risk a very unpleasant reprisal - to pull a prank like this!?

The raucous roar of laughter and cheers from the protesters held back by the police pounded into her ears. Among the crowd, most of them were as still and silent as her, staring blankly up at the giantess doused with paint. Eventually, though, some of them burst out into snickering, then full-blown laughter, adding to the din created by the protesters and making Meg's heart swell further with embarrassment and rage. She remained rooted to the spot, breathing heavily, her heart beating frightfully fast.

Meg had no idea how long she stood there, frozen in place as laughter erupted all around her. It was as if her mind had shut down. Of all the embarrassing things...at least today she was supposed to be honored as a savior, and now it was obvious how foolish it was to believe even THAT! Once again, she was a laughing stock of the entire town! Meg then felt like simply running away to hole herself up in her tent, but a sudden shout snapped her out of her shock. A mocking voice from down below, speaking through a megaphone.

"Hey Meg, like your new makeover!?"

Meg recognized the voice instantly. She glared down at the stage. Right beside it stood Connie D'Amico. From what Meg could make out, her expression was of smug self-satisfaction, completely devoid of fear.

That had to change. Finally finding the will to move, Meg stepped right over the stage, making sure to deliberately plant her foot only a few feet from where Connie D'Amico stood. However, Connie stood her ground, showing no sign of fleeing in terror. That only served to enrage Meg even more. "YOU!? What the hell do you think you're doing!? Aren't you supposed to be in Florida!?"

Connie grinned maliciously. "Well, when I read how a few people in Quahog were insisting that a fat, whiny loser like you actually deserved to be hailed as a hero, well, I decided to head home and see for myself," she said slyly, this time without the megaphone so only Meg could hear her. "And I thought I'd show my respect in my own way...or rather, my utter lack of it."

Meg clenched her fists so tightly, her nails dug deep into her palms. "You couldn't stand that for just one day, it was me in the spotlight instead of you, could you!?" she shrieked down at Connie. "It disgusts me to think I once wanted to be your friend. Now I see you're really nothing but a spoiled, self-centered bitch!"

"At least I don't have an ass that outweighs a herd of elephants. Or have to star in fetish porn just to earn enough for my next meal," said Connie haughtily.

Rage almost got the better of Meg. The urge to stomp on Connie and grind her into the dirt was overwhelming. No, that's too good for Connie. I'll have to come up with something more creative, like.... But a sudden rush of lightheadedness interrupted her thought process. Meg's hand rushed to her forehead, but she kept glaring daggers down at Connie, who seemed encouraged for some reason.

"Oh, and about how you're in the spotlight...do you really think there's enough people in this city who'd admire a fat loser like who, much less a freakishly huge fat loser? You thought your idiot father got this organized? I've got news for you...it was ME!"

"You...WHAT!?" cried Meg.

"That's right...I'M the one who really got the mayor to agree to this, just so I could humiliate you in front of the whole city!" shouted Connie. Then she turned her head, a shameful look in her eyes. "And you wouldn't believe the things I had to do to convince West to do this...."


Connie stood in front of Adam West in the mayor's office, hunched over from exhaustion and she repeatedly licked a Tootsie Roll Pop over and over and over again; she looked ready to pass out any second.

"1386, 1387, 1388, 1389, 1390," counted Mayor West. "By God, by the end of this day, we'll REALLY know how many licks it takes to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Roll Pop!"


That last statement was like a knife through Meg's heart. She had doubted that enough people in Quahog thought she deserved this ceremony, but she had hoped she was just being paranoid. Now it sounded like her paranoia was justified. Meg didn't want to believe it. She shook her head furiously, but suddenly she felt feverish as well as lightheaded, prompting her to hold her head in her hands. "You're lying...." Meg muttered, only half-believing what she said.

"Oh, and that's not even the best part!" Connie went on. "Your family really did have a hand in this, too! And they KNEW what I had planned for you!"

Meg glared back down at Connie, trying to fight off the feeling of lightheadedness. "Now I KNOW you're lying!" she thundered. "They'd never...."

"Oh really, you think so!?" Connie shot back. "I seen what they're like around you. Can you honestly say that they're weren't ashamed of you before, and that they don't want an ugly, worthless, Godzilla-sized fatass loafing in their backyard!?"

Meg simply refused to believe it. Her family came down on her hard at times, but there was no way they'd go THIS far. It was time to shut this skank up here and now. "That's enough out of you!" said Meg maliciously, cracking her knuckles. "It's time to do what I should've done a long, long time ago!" Meg thought this would finally strike some terror in Connie, but Connie still stood her ground. Why was she so confident? Did she have another trick up her sleeve?

"Oh, I don't think so, Megzilla! You see, I'm not a moron like you! I knew there was one surefire way to get you out of my life forever!" With that, she held up what looked like an empty plastic jug, then threw it at Meg's feet. Wondering what Connie's game was this time, Meg picked it up. She stared at the jug between her fingers, trying to make out the tiny lettering. When she finally did, she nearly had a heart attack.

It was peanut oil.

"That's right, your peanut allergy!" shouted Connie jubilantly when she saw the fearful look on Meg's face. "Those muffins you ate, didn't they have a fishy taste!? I'll have to thank Neil Goldman for that little nugget of information. You'd be surprised what he knows, having stalked you for so long...."

Meg's eyes got even wider. "NEIL!? He...he'd NEVER!!"

"You think so!? Use that oversized brain of yours! You now know that there's plenty of freaks like Neil who have jackoff fantasies about ginormous girls. You'd soon have hundreds of people around the world courting you! You think an obsessive freak like Neil would stand for that!? You made it crystal clear, all these years, that you despise him! He figured that if he couldn't have you, no one could!!"

Meg was once again frozen with shock, her heart beating dangerously fast, her breath coming in short gasps. If Connie was telling the truth...the only people she thought cared somewhat for her...her own family, even NEIL! Betrayed and backstabbed by the only people she thought she could even remotely count on!

"Well, if that's the case," said Meg as she raised one foot, her rage momentarily winning out over her terror, "then I'll get rid of them all before I go, STARTING WITH YOU!!!"

A collecive gasp came from the crowd as she lifted her foot, and Connie finally seemed taken aback. But just as Meg was ready to bring her foot down on Connie, she suddenly gagged involuntarily. She almost fell over, and stumbled backward as she struggled to keep her balance. It was then that Meg felt her airways constricting. *Oh God, no no NO!!!* Meg thought, terror clawing at her heart as she desperately tried to take a breath. Her hands clamped around her throat as she fought to take in air, but her airways were swiftly becoming more constricted as her body overreacted to the allergens in the peanut oil.

Meg dropped to her knees, her whole body convulsing as she kept on trying to breathe in. However, she soon realized it was futile. She was going into anaphylactic shock, and there was no way she could be treated at her size.

She could still hear Connie's sadistic, self-satisfied rantings. "Come on, come on, keel over you fatass bitch!" Needless to say, Meg was even more determined to make Connie pay. With a valient effort, she got back on her feet. As she continued to fight for breath, Meg raised her foot again. It hung there for a second, trembling along with the rest of her body....

And then Meg's eyes rolled into the back of her head, and she started falling sideways. Her titanic frame crashed onto the stage, immediately flattening it. The sound of lumber being crushed and splintered resounded throughout the area, and pieces of splintered wood flew everywhere as a large plume of dirt and dust rose from what was left of the stage.

The tremor nearly knocked Connie off her feet, but she stood her ground, shielding her face from the dirt and debris. When the plume of dirt finally cleared, she looked up to see Meg's motionless body lying atop the remains of the stage.


All this time, Meg's family had stood in the crowd, not sure what was going on, listening to Meg talk down to whoever had confronted her.

But when Meg had starting going into analphylactic shock, needless to say, they were finally spurred into action.

"Comin' through, comin' through!" shouted Peter panickingly, plowing through the crowd with the same skill that had made him part of the New England Patriots. Lois, Stewie, Brian and Neil followed in his wake.

When Peter had finally reached thr stage, however, he arrived to learn it was far too late. Meg had tumbled backwards, falling onto the stage and smashing it to pieces. Peter reflexively turned away to avoid the cloud of dirt. He felt bits of broken wood painfully bounce off of him. A few seconds later, he looked up again, only to see Meg's unmoving body lying on the remains of the stage.

For several moments, a deafening silence fell over the crowd as it was all taken in, only broken at first by a clap of thunder in the distance. Then, the protesters held at bay by the cops, burst into cheers, and soon some people in the crowd cheered as well. However, Peter and the others heard none of it, staring with disbelief at Meg's unconscious body. Until Brian spoke up....

"Connie D'Amico! I knew it!" Peter heard Brian shout. Peter turned to Brian, and saw where he was pointing at. Right beside the ruined stage, Connie D'Amico stood, beaming with triumph as she looked over her fallen rival. "What did you do to her!?"

"Oh nothing much. Just offered to supply some ingredients to bake a little something for Meg," said Connie, smiling sadistically. "Like, oh, about 200 gallons of peanut oil."

Predictably, the significance of that was lost on Peter. "Eh, I don't get it."

"Mr. Griffin, you mean to tell me you are completely ignorant of your daughter's potentially life-threatening peanut allergy?" asked Neil, glaring at him.

"OH NO!!! You mean my little girl...you POISONED her!?" Lois shrieked hysterically. Like everyone but Peter, she knew that if that was the case, there was no hope for Meg. At her size, treatment for anaphylactic shock was impossible.

"NO!!!" came Chris's cry of anguish, having finally arrived, showing up beside Connie and holding his microphone and stand. "Don't worry Meg, I will see you avenged!" With that, he began swinging his microphone as if it were a ball and chain. But in the blink of an eye, the microphone wrapped around Chris, and he fell to the ground, helplessly bound in wire.

Everyone stared dully at Chris for a moment, but soon Connie spoke up again. "Yes, I got the peanut oil! And I'm the one who got Mayor West to agree to organizing this ceremony for Meg! You somehow thought YOU were the one who convinced the mayor!?" she snarled, pointing at Peter. "A retraded freak like you!? Don't make me laugh! It was all me! Just so I could humiliate Meg at just the right time, while she was in the spotlight, right before her allergy killed her!"

Peter stared back stupidly. "Wow, that's...that's quite an elaborate plan you had there," he said, with a tone flirting dangerously close with respect.

"Peter, what are you saying?" said Brian exasperatedly. "Connie poisoned Meg and humiliated her in front of the whole town right before Meg's allregy killed her!"

"I know, I know. But still, you...you gotta respect that sort of dedication," Peter replied.

A blinding flash from a bolt of lightning illuminated the area, and a gentle drizzle began to descend over the city. But no one took any notice, especially not Brian, who glared at Peter intently. Eventually, he turned to face Connie again. "Meg was right. You COULDN'T stand that Meg was in the limelight instead of you!"

"Well, there was that, and there was THIS!" Connie spat, brushing the hair over her forehead aside to reveal the scar Peter had given her. "You think I would just FORGET about that run-in with the fire extinguisher!? Oh no, I haven't! And I haven't forgotten how you mortified me at the prom, Snoopy, or how the Little Einstein over there got me arrested!" she finished, pointing at Stewie. "Oh, and you know what the best part is!? I told Meg that all of you had planned this along with me! So her final thought was that you had all betrayed her!!"

Brian shook his head in disbelief. "You know what, I take it back. You're not a bitch-whore. That's an insult to bitch-whores everywhere!"

Another flash from lightning covered the area, accompanied by booming thunder. And off in the distance, the jeers of the crowd could still be heard. Perhaps it was all this that shook Lois out of her shocked silence, who had been overcome with grief and crying non-stop. "Oh don't worry, Brian. She's not gonna get away with it," said Lois, taking a step toward Connie while cracking her knuckles threateningly. "Part of me's been itching to open up another can of tae-jitsu flavored wup-ass for a long time...."

"If I may, Mrs. Griffin, allow me to assist you," Neil said suddenly, stepping up beside Lois and striking a martial arts pose. "From time to time, I too have dabbled in the ancient fighting arts, thanks to material posted online, and as the one who was destined for your daughter I feel it is now my obligation to use it to honor her memory."

"Um, as amusing as it may be to watch such carnage unfold, I believe such retribution may be premature," said Stewie suddenly. "You see, I would hypothesize that, with a physiology of Meg's scale, perhaps the overreaction of the immune system due to allergens may not be quite as deadly. And if you'll look over at Meg's fallen body, I think my hypothesis has just been proven correct."

With a gasp, Brian turned to see what Stewie was talking about. And sure enough, Meg's foot twitched slightly, and they could see Meg's rise as she gingerly took in a breath.

Brian turned back to Connie. "Hey Connie, do...do me a favor. Try to picture the biggest fan that you can. I mean, imagine a big fan with the diameter of, oh I dunno, about a hundred feet. Now try to imagine if King Kong took a really big dump and threw all the aforementioed feces at the previously mentioned fan while it's running full speed. Because, I...I have this nagging feeling that that pretty much describes what's gonna happen to Quahog thanks to you."


Breath slowly flowed back into Meg's lungs, making her gag and hack up mucus. She tried to move, but found that her whole back ached with each attempt she made. For a moment, she struggled to remember where she was, and what had happened to her. She was dimly aware of raindrops splattering all over her face. Then there was the sound of thunder, followed by bright light from lightning filtering through her eyelids. Was she outside somewhere? She couldn't quite remember. As she tried to gather her thoughts, she became aware of the sound of...people cheering? Lots of people from the sound of it, bursting with joyous whooping, which sounded mocking and disdainful....

Then, all of a sudden, it all came rushing back to her. The ceremony at city hall, Connie's elaborate plan to humiliate her in front of everybody, then kill her. And from the sound of it, no one was sad about it. She was right all along. It was foolish to expect anyone to care about her. The fact that she had saved dozens of people from that fire meant nothing to them. All they saw was a mindless, monstrous THING, not a person. Which wasn't much different from how everyone viewed her before....

Including her family.

Her fists clenched at Connie's words rang in her head. They had conspired against her. Plotted to kill her. They hadn't exactly been the most supportive family before, but to go THIS far!? And even NEIL, in a fit of jealousy, had turned on her!

Acceptance. That was the only thing she ever truly wanted in life. That wasn't too much to ask, was it? And yet, throughout her whole life, at every turn, she was rejected, mocked, treated like a freakshow. And now, after a freak accident that was no fault of her own, she was labeled a menace and a monster. Even her own family...they'd finally shown their true colors! Even one of the only boys who ever showed any true desire for her had stabbed her in the back!

With that realization, Meg's mind finally snapped.


"I'll be damned...she's OK!" exclaimed Peter, watching with awe and relief as Meg slowly started to sit up. Meg brushed bits of dirt and splintered wood off of her. She took a deep breath, then once again coughed up mucus. It sprayed all over the crowd, eliciting groans of protest from them, but Meg paid them no attention as she slowly rose to her feet. Now the crowd gasped with apprehension, seeing Meg at her full, towering height. But once again, she paid them no mind, looking down at everyone by the smashed stage, her family, Neil, Connie....

"Damn Meg, you had us all worried there for a sec. You...." Peter began, but his words slowly trailed off when he noticed the way she was glaring down at them all. Her eyes blazed with smoldering, fiery hatred.

For everyone.

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