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Author's Chapter Notes:

This was originally a commission by Lancealot501 (go read Terra, it's awesome). The idea came from one of his suggestions which can be found in his library. I had a whole lot of fun writing it, and I hope you enjoy reading it. 

 

Tags: Gentle, Amazon (7-14 feet), breasts

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***It’s A Date Then***

 

"Wait, wait! Hold on!"

 

Damien had only just strapped himself into the cart seat when the cry caused the attendant next to him, a Beta like himself, to look up.

 

"Can I still get on? Is there a seat left?" The voice continued. It sounded, based on the slight pitch down, like an Alpha. A girl Alpha. There was a certain tone of urgency present in her voice, and that made Damien a little nervous- most Alphas were nice if you got to know them- just like Betas, only a little over twice the regular height. Still, their height gave them something of a... Social advantage when it came to getting what they wanted. At just under six feet, Damien was a certified Beta and avoided Alphas whenever he could- bad memories from high school. 

 

Still, despite himself, it was with not only a little bit of schaudenfruede that Damien realized he'd taken the last seat on this roller coaster. He'd practically sprinted to get here before sunset- today was the last day before they closed this coaster for a month-long overhaul and safety check. It was his first ride of the day, and he promised himself that nothing would get in the way of that. He kept his promises, even on the last of the seats of the last of the day's rides.

 

"Sorry ma'am, rides full. You'll have to wait until next month. Repairs start tonight and it will take a long time. Sorry."

 

Damien heard what sounded like a huff, and he found himself thinking of pufferfish. He glanced to his left and saw an older Alpha woman look down at him and roll her eyes, apparently enjoying the schaudenfruede as well. He felt a little bit of relief- the Beta attendant was with him on this one, and so was the older Alpha lady. His nervousness melted away. 

 

"Oh, come on," the huffing voice continued, almost reaching a nasally tone, "there's got to be one left. See, look there, in the back!"

 

He heard a gate open and footsteps coming toward his cart. The Beta attendant shuffled nervously towards the sound. 

 

"Ma'am, uh, ma'am. You can't be back here, ma'am..."

 

"I know, I know," the voice grew louder, "but look. There's one empty seat!" 

 

Damien began to grow nervous once again, this time at a very uncomfortable pace- the girl had come in anyway! What's more, she'd probably force him off. He shifted again, now suddenly uncomfortable in his restraints, trying desperately to undo the buckle that held him securely in place. 

 

"Um," he mumbled involuntarily, his fingers not quite dexterous enough.

 

Curse these engineering fingers, he lamented. He could safely transport minute drops of chemicals from one tray to another, and never miss the aqueous waste bucket, but why, why oh god, why could he not do this?

 

A shadow fell on him, followed by the soft smell of a fragrant and fruity perfume.

 

"See, look! This one's empt- oh." 

 

Damien turned his head, as his eyes went up and up and up to meet the  face of miss Oh. There she stood, looking down and her lips in a pout, the sudden realization that yes, in fact, the attendant hadn't been lying about there being no seats left available.

 

The second thing he notice about her was her hair, a vivid and stark red, and how it draped over her face. It wasn't quite long enough to drape completely, but not too short that it looked prudish or pixie. Her green eyes, visible even in the shadow of the canopy that covered the roller coaster platform, looked up and down on him- not quite disapprovingly (though that had happened frequently in Damien's Beta-Alpha conversations), but maybe disappointedly. 

 

She was quite beautiful, at first glance. Still, her beauty and her Alpha-size (Damien guessed she was a 13-footer) set Damien into a slight panic. Was she going to kick him off? Was she going to berate him like so many others have done to him? Old memories of football jockery and bros swam up from the subconscious, bringing back old bile. 

 

He was prepared for the worst. 

 

But then she spoke. 

 

"Hi."

 

"Uh... Hi?" Damien offered a wry little smile and wiggled his fingers at her. 

 

Her mouth contorted (rather cutely, he decided) and then quickly grew into a bit of a smile.

 

"I don't suppose you'd want to... Let me on?"

 

That feeling- that anxiety for what he was going to say next. She'd be upset, no doubt. Maybe even angry. But still, fairs fair, and he got here first. Though Alphas were slightly more like to get what they wanted, Betas had rights too. Still, he supposed, what was the right thing to do? Giving up his seat was a good thing, yes, and given the circumstances, the fact he'd probably not be able to ride this particular coaster for another year or so (his college funds were lacking)... He might even be nominated for sainthood.

 

After a few seconds deliberation, he had made up his mind. He was going to-

 

"Wait," she blurted, snapping her prodigious fingers and pointing at him, "hold that thought. I'll be right back!"

 

She scurried off, her sneakers tamping on the concrete deck rather loudly.

 

*************

 

This was ridiculous. Insane. Idiotic. Irresponsible. Dangerous. Liable to legal recourse. Stupid. 

 

Comfy.

 

How he got conned into sitting in her lap for the ride... He'll never know how that happened. But even still, as the lackadaisical attendant (so lackadaisical, in fact, that he responded thus- "do you mind if we ride doubles?" "Ma'am, you could kill someone in front of me and I wouldn't care.") strapped them in, the very first that he noticed was how... Cushiony his ride mate was. It was soft, unlike anything he'd felt before. It was warm- though that might well have been the late summer sun. It was also fragrant- that fruity perfume that he couldn't quite place (it might've been cherries, strawberries... Or snozberries) washed over him, and not in an unpleasant way. 

 

He set his own hands on his own lap, but only once accidentally set them at his sides- that only lasted for about  a quarter of a second after feeling warm flesh that was not his own, but the embarrassment and the stifled, melodious giggle that accompanied it lasted a while longer.

 

After ensuring that both participants were secured (or thereabouts) fit the ride, the attendant came on the loudspeaker. 

 

"Yeah so like keep your arms and legs and whatever in the ride or whatever. Hey Dave I quit." *kkkkkzzzzh*

 

With that on their minds, with not a few wanting suddenly to get off the coaster, the ride lurched to a start and they were off. As they climbed up the very long slope up to where they would find their energy and inertia needed for the ride, Damien was faintly aware of a buzzing in his ears. 

 

He leaned back, and feeling the plush and warm breasts sink beneath his head, snapped right back forward.  Trying his hardest to not scream from embarrassment, he tried to get a better view of his surroundings. The highest coaster in the park, he felt just a slight sense of vertigo overtake him, but it soon passed. He rarely got sick- of course, the way this day was going, it would be par for the course if he ralphed all over this soft, fragrant girl he sat upon.

 

Again, that buzzing. He was faintly aware of there being some shouting, but only shortly did he realize who was talking to whom- the Alpha at his back was talking to him. 

 

"Thaaaanferboodi."

 

"What?"

 

"I said," she said, slightly louder, "thank you for doing this."

 

"You're welcome," he shouted back perfunctorily. Given both how absurdly awkward and heavenly comfortable he felt, he wasn't sure which he really felt. Should he be thanking her for not kicking him off? Giving him (literally) the seat of a lifetime? He didn't know. She certainly wasn't pushy like many Alphas- she had practically half begged half apologized with her head low when proposing the idea to the attendant. 

 

"What's your name?" She shouted over the din. The first carts had slipped past the edge, and their occupants were screaming in childlike joy and thrill. He didn't understand the first time.

 

"My name?" He shouted back, cupping his hand so the sound reverberated to the back of him.

 

"Yeah!"

 

"My name's Damien."

 

"Damien." She said it ponderously, as if weighing the name in her mind. "That's a nice name."

 

That made him crack a smile- Alpha or not, she was still a pretty girl, and that pretty girl had just given him a compliment. It made him feel pleasantly male. If she had been looking at him directly or he had flipped on her lap so as to face her (god help me, he thought), she might've seen his face redden.

 

Over the edge they teetered, the soft pause you hear at the apex of a climb that lets you stop and think and see for miles around and forget the fact that you're on a contraption built by the lowest bidder and designed by the 'C's get degrees' school of civil engineering.

 

Then, like the b-b-b-bass in so much of the music he liked, they dropped. 

 

The Alpha at his back, his bottom, currently clutching him along the stomach, may have said her name, but he did not hear it- the Alpha next to him and the one he sat upon were screaming too loudly for him to hear anything anyhow. 

 

Up and down, side to side the coaster went- deft turns and stomach-lurching drops all assaulted Damien every second. His body, made sway to the forces of inertia and counter pressure, was often forced back, despite his attempts to lean, right into the body of his riding companion. It wasn't so bad, he thought- if it were not for the fact that every time it happened his head was wedged between two of the largest breasts he'd ever felt or maybe even seen before. 

 

The sensation was riveting, despite himself. The idea that he was practically experiencing something few young men his age had ever had the chance, nay, the privilege was unique- but how soft. How squishy. How fragrant. 

 

He found himself... Well, enjoying it- at least, that was what the semi he was nursed the entire ride indicated. He decided, in the end, to be a bad boy, and enjoy this ride for what it was.

 

He smiled to himself- the late summer sun was shining, the wind blowing through his unkempt black hair. It was too nice of a day to be worried about niceties. He would enjoy himself, and he and this girl would soon part and never speak to, of, or look upon each other ever again. Pure fun.

 

And soon enough, he found himself screaming too, waving his hands up in the air, absolutely tickled as the forces played havoc on his inner ears as he screwdrove, looped, and lurched ahead on what had to be the best roller coaster ride on his life.

 

*************

 

Damien all but powerwalked towards the coaster platform's exit. He was intent to leave the premises as soon as possible, and had practically leapt off the Alpha once the restraints were unlatched. 

 

A part of him felt bad about it- leaving the girl who had been kind (and insightful) enough to suggest they both ride. Still, this guilt was immediately overridden by the embarrassment of having inadvertently accomplished everything short of 3rd base while on that roller coaster and having to face that very woman or ever look her in the eye again (not that that was too difficult- Alpha-Beta height difference and all).

 

And on he walked. He had just sailed past the ticket counter and was almost to the cotton candy stand when he heard a tmp tmp tmp getting louder and closer to him. 

 

"Hey! Wait up!"

 

Oh fack, he thought.

 

"Damien! I said hold on!"

 

Damien suddenly felt and saw the shadow loom over him, but he kept on walking, stubbornly and full of teenage pride (though he was technically nineteen). Still, despite his trudge, the busty redhead had slowed her trot in order to keep pace. 

 

"Hiya! Where you goin'?"

 

He kept his eyes forward, fixed on the road ahead, hoping to see an exit indicator soon- the sooner he was out of this theme park, the less embarrassing it would be. 

 

"Back to my apartment. I need to unpack for semester."

 

She seemed to ponder this.

 

"I see. Hey, me too, actually. I need to unpack my boxes and put on my bedsheets. They're new, and I'm so excited..." She stopped herself, then shook her head. She then smiled dazzlingly and looked back down at him, tilting her head slightly. 

 

"My name's Rena, by the way. I'm a junior. Over at State."

 

"Nice to meet you, Rena."

 

"Nice to meet you too, Damien." Then, hurriedly, "again, I mean. Hey listen," she began, "you did me a really big favor. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have gotten to ride that coaster for at least four months! My parents visit me out here during winter break and we come out to the theme park. Thank you so much for that!"

 

"You," Damien replied, "are very welcome. Have a good night, Rena."

 

"Good ni- hey, actually," she trotted ahead of him a little bit, getting ahead. She turned round and walked backwards. "Can i buy you dinner? I really owe ya one..."

 

"I'm not hungry, thanks."

 

"Oh. Okay... Um... How about..." She twisted her head round and searched. Visual clues. "How 'bout a funnel cake? Wait, that's food, isn't it..." She contorted her lips while in thought- Damien thought it was downright adorable, if not telling.

 

She snapped her fingers- an idea.

 

"How about a drink then? There's a great dive bar down the road from here."

 

"I'm only nineteen."

 

"Really? Oh wow. I thought... Well, nevermind. But hey," she quickened her pace once more, then too a couple of steps right in front of him. She knelt, and he found himself face to face with this girl once again. She smiled and her soft green eyes lit up her face, soft features highlighted in the waning sun. A button nose. A low cut shirt. Short shorts. Black high top sneakers. Light freckled skin, opposite of his own black hair and olive complexion. She set a soft, lithe hand on his arm, and he felt her warmth. It was very pleasant. He felt his spine unstiffen just a bit.

 

"Listen, you did me a really nice favor back there, Damien. The least I can do is buy you a milkshake. Can I at least do that for you?"

 

She smiled at him, just a little sadly, and she cocked her head pleadingly. Captive, he realized. He was embarrassed, yes, but how could he make himself look like an asshat on top of that? How could he resist?

 

***************

"So you're going to Greensfield University? That's State's rival!" 

 

She delightedly took a sip of her strawberry shake, her cheeks fluctuating slightly from the vacuum. Something in the way she said it didn't make it hostile- she was simply stating fact, and by her smile, it told him that she was interested in this conversation.

 

"Uh huh," he nodded, stirring his own purple huckleberry ice cream- he had requested extra milk- so it wasn't as thick. After hearing this, Rena had done the same. He then grinned, and asked, "is this okay? Buying a shake for the enemy?" 

 

Rena smiled and pushed her straw around.

 

"I guess this one time. So what are you studying?"

 

Ahh, the old standbys. This wasn't a date by any means, but he supposed it was only natural two college students turn to academics to make conversation.

 

"Chemical engineering. You?"

 

"Oh, so you're like, super smart then!" She ignored his query but Damien didn't mind. "What do you want to do with your degree?"

 

He shook his head. 

 

"Not sure. Might go into med school or pharmaceuticals. Lots of money to be made there." He sighed, trying to look cool for this next part. "I want to help people with my work. Make them healthy through medicine or drugs. Who knows," he tried, "maybe I can find a way to make Alphas smaller. Eliminate the Alpha-Beta divide."

 

She flared her eyes.

 

"That's possible? Making people shrink?"

 

"Well, maybe, with enough time and research..."

 

"Whoa," she concluded succinctly. "Super smart."

 

He chuckled, played with his spoon again. 

 

"Well, I wouldn't say that..." He smiled and realized that he was nervous. Weird. Still. The compliment did wonders for his fragile little Beta ego. "What about you?" He continued, eager to move on. "What's your major?"

 

"Me? Oh, now there's a story..." She rolled her eyes. "Freshman year it was pre-med, then it was communications..." She squinted her eyes up at him. "You're nineteen, so you're a... Sophomore, right?"

 

He nodded. 

 

"Yep. Going into second year."

 

"Cool. Okay, then... Um... Oh yeah, majors. Um," somewhere in her brain, Damien suspected that gears were creaking back to life. "Well, my major right now is fine arts. Dancing, with a minor in singing."

 

"Oh, a showgirl, huh?"

 

She nodded.

 

"Yep, something like that. I love to move my body and express myself. I like to entertain people, actually- I hope that after I get my degree, I can become an actress and make people laugh." 

 

"Yeah? Well you certainly have the face for it."

 

She giggled when he turned red, realizing what he had just said. He cleared his throat and moved on. 

 

"So, um," he tripped over his words, "do you have a boyfriend?"

 

Shiiiiiiit why why why did I say that, he berated himself.

 

Rena, God bless her, only cast him a sidelong glance and a grin. With a chuckle and stirring her milkshake (nearly half done, he realized- where did this girl put it all? She was pretty cut! Then again, she was a dancer...) She spared him the further humiliation and simply answered his question, clearing her own throat. 

 

"Well, no, not right now..." She shook her head a bit. "Charlie and I just broke up." She scrunched up her little button nose that made Damien almost smile. Just too damn cute. 

 

"He has his commitment to football and his coach told him he had to focus completely on his game and cut away any excess if he wanted to be scouted for the National League, especially considering he's a quarterback. I guess," she said, during the first time her emerald eyes did not shine that evening, "I was one of those excess things."

 

For a second, Rena looked like she might cry. Damien had no idea how to follow that. He considered putting his hand on top of hers but he thought twice- it might not have been well received. 

 

The stark white knight in him creaked to life- how could someone break up with so kind a person? Then again, he didn't have the whole story. Maybe there was more to this then let on, he thought- science had made him cautious like that. Still, even so, the white knight lawful good paladin in him roared his holy righteous indignation. This Charlie had some nerve, making a girl like Rena cry like that. Who cares if he was a quarterback for State? Chivalry dictated that one does not make ladies of the court cry... 

 

Wait. 

 

Charlie, a QB for State.

 

No. Way. It couldn't be. 

 

"Wait," Damien asked, tentatively, "Charlie... Denham? You dated Charlie Denham? The QB for State? The guy who singlehandedly tossed  the winning pass over seventy yards?"

 

The look that passed Rena's face made him immediately regret his question- her eyelids narrowed and she pouted her lips. 

 

"Ah. A fan of his, I see." 

 

Oh, the look he must have had on his face. Apparently, she saw it, as she cocked her eyebrow shortly after her own accusation.

 

"Well, I, I, I... Rena, you gotta understand, f-football is a tradition in my family, and we know all the players in the state, s-so..."

 

He must've looked a nervous wreck. 

 

"No, I know, I understand," Rena began with a lilt in her voice, "he's a big deal. I get it, I do. He's a dang good player, for sure. And I'm happy for him, really..." She stirred the last bit of milkshake, skewing a strawberry whole on her straw. "I just wish he would've shared his time, you know?"

 

That struck him hard. How could it not? Damien wasn't a monster, and he could empathize with her- it must've been difficult, breaking up with a high profile guy like Charlie. A whole gamut of emotions right there, high profile or not.

 

Suddenly to him, Rena looked very small. For a second the divide wasn't there, and he was more interested in comforting this friend of his than getting the hell out of Dodge after his little roller coaster fiasco. 

 

He took a chance, and his hand reached across the table, clutching her few outstretched fingers near her shake glass. 

 

She looked up and regarded him with wet emerald eyes. The setting sun caught in them and he could see the minute patterns in the iris of this woman. The way slight lines pointed to the pupil, darkening slightly in a mesh that made him realize that her eye color was not a single shade of green but many. Emerald, viridian, new leaf, pine, grass. The eyes, the eyes. He felt as though he could fall in and swim forever.

 

He was caught out of his reverie when he felt her thumb of the hand he reached out to touch and press firmly on the back of his own hand. It startled him at first but the smile she directed to him told him that he was fine, this was okay. 

 

"I'm sorry, Rena," he began. "For everything. You probably didn't deserve to be tossed aside like that. From what I know of you, you're a generous and considerate person. I can't imagine why Charlie did that. I'm sorry."

 

Then, because people like to be comforting and say things that are certainly well meaning and and well intentioned but not entirely reflective of their thoughts, he said,

 

"If there's anything I can do."

 

And just like that, her eyes lit up.

 

"Great!" She suddenly burst. The yelp startled Damien not a little, and he nearly flung his hands to his ears to protect them from the prodigious sound coming from the Alpha. "It's settled then," she spoke again, a little more softly.

 

She rose up from her seat and walked around the table to where Damien was sitting. Without any trouble, she took him by his aides and lifted him from his chair, only a small yelp of protest spilling out of his mouth.

 

"You'll spend the evening with me then!"

 

"I... I will?"

 

"Yep!" She set him on the ground and put her hands on his shoulders. Again, he felt captivated by those green eyes. "Since we're both here alone, it's only natural that we enjoy it together- these kinds of places are always more fun with company, don't you agree?"

 

Slowly, Damien nodded, unable to do anything contrary to it.

 

"Uh huh... I guess."

 

She smiled wide and stood back up, still gazing down on him.

 

"Great. Let's get going then. This will be so much fun!"

 

She gripped him by the hand, and she practically yanked him with her, off to see the sights and sounds of the rest of the theme park, she whistling to herself and him wondering just what in the hell had happened, leaving the rest of his huckleberry shake behind. 

 

******************

 

Nestled in the heart of the park next to the food court (where Rena had bought Damien his milkshake) was the arcade. During the night, most of the coasters and rides were closed (with the exception of the haunted house, which didn't open until an hour or so), so most of the parks patrons contented themselves with the kitschy carnival style games of skill and luck. Among the electronic arcades were ring toss, bottle throw, water squirters, and other classics. Most of these were occupied, so it was with only some hesitation that Rena took Damien to the electronic arcade. 

 

They passed a Beta-scaled Whackamole machine, which Rena simply stated at.

 

"What is it?" Was her query. 

 

"Wait, you've never played this game? Whackamole? It's super fun." He confided. He ambled over to the machine and inserted a couple of quarters. Then, like Thor wielding Mjolnir, he hefted the foam bat and set to work.

 

It was a lot more difficult than he remembered, he found- for some reason he couldn't keep up with the tumult of noises and butt ugly mechanical rodents that popped their heads out once every so. Still, within the first ten seconds he started to get the hang of it, and racked up points like a pro. It came easy once you got the rhythm of it down pat.

 

"33,000," he declared magnanimously. He looked up at Rena proudly who was softly clapping her hands. 

 

"Look at you go," she cooed, "but now it's my turn. It doesn't look so difficult..."

 

Her performance proved otherwise- even with her Alpha arm length and speed advantages on the Beta machine, Rena struggled to hit any of them. The rodents, seemingly aware of her novice status in such a game, chirped and whirled mockingly at her. 

 

"12,000," Damien read, nodding his head up and down. "Not too bad for a beginner," he tried to console. Rena wore an annoyed pout on her pink lips, squinting at the machine. Then, she held out her hand to him, looking and grinning mischievously at her little friend.

 

"Another quarter, please."

 

He gave her one, and stepped back- was she going to try again? He supposed that really said something about her- determination and effort. What would she do differently this time? 



As if in answer to that question,  he saw her kneel down and place, perplexingly, her very prodigious breasts onto the game board. She was able to cover three of the seven rodent holes with her boobs- quite the feat. 

 

He felt a bead of sweat curl down his neck, despite the evening cool. He had the passing thought that he would have liked very much to be that game board right now.

 

"What are you..." He half whispered to her, but she was not listening. Her tongue stuck to the side of her mouth for concentration, she set another quarter in, and she began again. The mechanics whirred an wizzed, but she was not deterred. She did a lot better this time- she was able to concentrate fully on the top four holes and manage the rodents there with ease, while her prodigious mammaries bounced every so often up then down quickly. Again, beads of sweat continued to trickle down his neck at the sight of them jiggling.

 

Despite the... Well, cheat, she did very well- each rodent that popped up on her boobs registered as a hit, and with her concentration on the top four, she was able to get essentially every hit. 

 

62,000!

 

"Heyyyyy," Rena droned lazily, grinning kid-like, "I did pretty good." She glanced down at her companion once she stood up and brushed her knees off. "See? Not so hard once you get the trick, right?"

 

Damien simply grinned mirthlessly and nodded. 

 

"I suppose... Still, that'd be like me having you chase me through a Beta jungle gym- I'd have the advantage, like you did here!"

 

She giggled melodiously, endearingly.

 

"Aww," she mock cooed, "is Damien sad because big bad Rena beat his high score?" She laughed and squeeze him on the shoulder. "Come on, you- let's go see what that game over there is."

 

'That game over there' was a small little stall with six steel milk bottles stacked in a triangle. At it, an Alpha blonde with a State baseball jersey hucked old baseballs at the milk bottles, knocking them clean off and making them crash to the ground.

 

"Oh, phooey," Rena pouted her lips adorably, "someone's using it." She scanned the area again then squeezed Damien on shoulder lightly. "Come on, there's another game this way!"

 

She brought him over to a tower where you could strike a square on the floor with a mallet. When struck, a weight would zip up and, if you struck true and hard, ring the bell some 20 feet off the ground. A test of strength. 

 

Damien noticed that every three or so feet, there were tiered levels of strength, ranging from 'Wimpy Baby' at the bottom to 'Herculean Hero' at the top. He had sinking feeling. How could he compete with an Alpha? Even more so on a Beta level game?

 

He felt a pair of hands push him in the direction of the game, urging him on. 

 

"Well, go ahead! Show me what muscles you got, big guy!" She smiled coquettishly, enough to make him forget how stupid he was about to look. 

 

Guys lose their upper brains around girls, son, damien's father had warned him early on as a child. Now, on the cusp of manhood, he was beginning to see how true that really was. 

 

Still, despite him knowing he was about to truly embarrass himself, Damien dug in his pocket for a quarter and handed it to the aged Beta attendant, who shook his head forlornly. 

 

"Tough break, kid," he said, like he was some oracle of that gave bleak futures of lowered expectations and unimpressed females. He handed him the sledge hammer, a weighty piece of iron that he half expected was purchased at a pawn shop or liquidation sale at the meat packing plant.

 

One breath. Two. He raised the hammer high above him, arched his back, and brought it down with all his might. Up the weight went...

 

And it peaked at fourteen feet- safely in the middle of the tier that designated him as 'Macho Man.' 

 

He heard a clapping behind him- Rena was cheering him on and jumping up and down, the ground tremor in slightly as she landed.

 

"Muscle man!" She chanted, and strangely, he couldn't help but feel embarrassed. But then again, it wasn't a bad embarrassed. He took a slight bow, a smile on his face. He then trotted over to her, and offered up the hammer to her.

 

"Now... Your turn, right?"

 

"I suppose so..." 

 

Rena paid the attendant, who backed away and simply watched. 

 

"Careful now, miss- this here is a Beta machine. So no goin' crazy, y'hear?"

 

She gulped and nodded her head at him. The weight of the task suddenly dawned on her, and she looked nervous.

 

"Y-yessir!"

 

Rena turned to Damien who chuckled. He held up a solitary hand and wiggled his fingers. She seemed to get the message. She gripped then, the hammer by the bottom with one hand and raised it up slightly. Then, closing her eyes, she brought the iron down, splitting the square immediately. The weight shot up, faster than Damien could imagine. Past the tiers it went, and it slammed into the bell with a thunderous clang, short lived- the bell ripped from the screws that held it fast, and they watched helplessly as it flew up some ten feet higher, suspending beautifully for about a half second, then soared back down and hit the concrete with an ugly song. 

 

Most of crowd around them had stopped to see what the commotion was. The silence that followed seemed to last a lifetime, even longer for Rena and Damien. Then, God rest whomever it was, someone began to clap. A single bit in truth, but then someone took up the call and began as well. Soon enough, the tumult started, and whoops and shouts and clapping hands filled the air. 

 

Despite his initial embarrassment, Damien couldn't help but clap himself. It was funny, to be sure, but it was also pretty interesting. He was amazed at how strong even one handed she could swing. Was that attributable to her Alpha size or was she really swinging with all her might? He couldn't tell. Either way, the prospect was terrifying- God help him if he ever made this woman upset. 

 

Still, Rena seemed pleased (or at least tickled) by the sudden applause. She smiled softly and then took a graceful curtsy, belying her skill as a dancer. When it died down, she trotted over to the attendant with a sheepish grin on her face, reaching out and handing him the sledge. 

 

He took it with reverence, thinking a moment and then saying,

 

"I've worked here some thirty years, young miss. Never once have I seen that happen."

 

Then, a big old grin passed his mouth and he gave a toothy smile. 

 

"And now I can finally say one of my life goals is fulfilled- seeing just that. Thank you, young lady."

 

************

 

The milk bottle game was still being occupied by the wannabe major leaguer and and his gaggle of women, both Alpha and Beta, each pining for a favor, to win her this toy or that. 

 

Rather than wait, the two decided to go to the haunted house instead.

 

Neither had been there before, and while Rena admitted she'd passed by it once or twice thinking she'd brave it by herself, it never happened. Not alone, anyhow. But, she explained, now that she had a friend to go with, she could do it. 

 

"But won't you still get scared? Even though you're with someone else?" He asked. 

 

To which, Rena smiled saccharinely and looked down on him. 

 

"Maybe," she admitted, with a roll of her eyes, "but you'll protect me if I do, won't you?"

 

Damien chuckled and kept walking towards the entrance of the facility, a big, creaky looking house that played corny, almost royalty-free sounding thunder and ghastly moans. Strobe lights flickered in the night sky, giving the place an admittedly convincing appearance. It might have even passed for spooky if not for the theme park's mascot standing outside smiling. 

 

"Yeah, I suppose I will. Kind of funny though, right? The chihuahua guarding the Great Dane?"

 

She laughed, a melodious sound.

 

"Oh, my hero. I don't even speak Danish." But then, she added, "but they are delicious. My favorite is cherry."

 

The haunted house was... Quite the spectacle. Several actors dressed in gory and obscene costumes hammed it up and did their best to contribute to the spooky atmosphere. Most of the rooms were meant to build up an atmosphere and then have an actor jump out and try to startle you. It was effective, but rather predictable- though for Damien it did startle him occasionally.

 

There was one very special room that neither of the pair quite expected. All sorts of red and crimsons bedecked the room, walls splashed Jackson Pollock style to look like blood splatters, red silk shades overhanging from the ceiling, and even those lighted red cloths that danced under a light and fan to imitate a fire were stuck intermittently along the wall. 

 

As Rena and Damien and the little mixed group they were lopped in with made their way across, some hellish voice cackled and and echoed throughout the room, from some unseen speaker from what Rena thought was below her. 

 

A smokescreen appeared and a demon face materialized from the motes of light sent by the projector above them. It grinned like hubris at them from behind empty, reddened sockets. Despite himself, Damien couldn't but help tense up. Rena apparently did the same, as he felt two hands wrap onto his shoulders with quite a bit more than was comfortable. 

 

"Welcome, honored sacrifices!" The demonhead roared in a guttural rasp, "you have come into my lair, and now we shall bathe these unholy walls in your blood! Send forth the demons to collect them!!"

 

"Jesus Christ, this is a kids' theme pa-ack" 

 

Damien's sentence was cut off with a sharp tell as Rena picked him up, literally, from the ground. A few actors, clad in red robes and disturbing masks, came out of the door behind the smokescreen and corralled their little group into the next chamber, where no doubt their desanguination was to commence. Rena, upon arrival of these actors (mostly Betas), squeezed Damien tight as a vice. 

 

"R-Reen." He squeaked out, feeling helpless. "Leggo."

 

His words, made already small and weak by her arms wrapping around him and forcing the air out his lungs, were completely drowned out by Rena's high pitched scream. It wasn't a terrible cry, or one that caused discomfort, but it was very very loud. It might've almost seemed comical to him if he hadn't felt like a rib was about to break. They'd be bruised, though, for sure. 

 

Still, it was not without its comforts- she had held him close to her front end, the majority of his body and pressed against a soft (but not flabby) midriff; his head, he noted in utter but agonizing delight, was squished between her two Alpha-grade boobages. 

 

They were soft. Warm. Rumbly, as followed her screaming. For a second, the pain melted away from Damien's body and it was just him the breasts, one with the universe in so moksha-esque oneness. They felt flush against his cheeks and, he realized, he could smell the fruity perfume he had encountered earlier at the roller coaster. What's more, the claustrophobic walls and heat of the haunted house, along with Rena's own fear, had caused a thin sheen of perspiration to form in the crevice of her breasts. In addition to the fruit was the distinct scent of woman (no, of her), fresh and alive and blood coursing inside of her. 

 

Being of the nerdy variation, Damien wasn't the most skilled in the arts of... Really, anything to do with the opposite sex. It didn't help that the school of engineering tended to be a sausagefest at his university. As a result, this embrace that Rena had locked him into was a very novel (or at least unfamiliar) sensation. He felt warm. He felt safe. He felt secure in the arms of this woman he had just met, even just barely knowing her. It made his insides stir, his stomach do backflips and his heart palpitate flutteringly. It made him, without his permission he lamented, nurse a semi in his pants. 

 

He just... Felt good. Like he could stay there next to forever.

 

Another squeeze and yelp, however, alerted him to the present. In his reverie, he failed to notice that they had reached the end of the haunted house, exiting from the stuffy acrid smoke and into the clear night skies and breeze. Rena held him firm, however, and it was only a short trot to a patch of vividly green grass that she let go. When she did, he dropped unceremoniously onto the ground with a thud.

 

"Oh no, Damien!" She knelt down over him and placed a hand on top of him. rolling him over onto his back. "Are you okay?" She said, sounding on the verge of tears. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to squeeze you so hard."

 

He chuckled (which hurt) and set a hand on her knee. 

 

"Did a demon get you?"

 

She sniffed loudly and cocked her eyebrow. 

 

"What?"

 

"Did the demons get you. Did I protect you from them?"

 

Rena laughed at that and rolled her eyes. She set a hand on his own and squeezed (considerably softer). She set her hands under him and lifted, setting him on his feet. 

 

"You did, my little hero!"

 

"Oh good. I charge by the hour, you know. For body guarding, I mean.

 

***************

They rested briefly, Rena apologizing the entire time while Damien rubbed his ribs, and then headed off. The milk bottle game was finally free. It was getting pretty late and, most of the park patrons being of the younger crowd, the park had nearly emptied. Some of the games had closed down for the night, their canvas covers closed and zipped up tight, but the milk bottle one still had its attendant, looking very bored and her nose dug into her phone.

 

"Yall wanna play?" She asked through a mouthful of chewing gum. She was an Alpha, eleven feet tall. "Only a buck for three balls."

 

"Sure," Rena beamed, pulling a crumpled dollar from her short shorts pocket.

 

The game was simple- knock down all six bottles, and she had three chances to do so. It was harder than it looked- the bottles were weighted, no doubt.

 

This was evidenced by the second try (the first ball had sailed over the bottles harmlessly)- the ball struck the bottom middle bottle dead center- and didn't even budge! 

 

"What the..." Rena scowled.

 

"Ya gotta chuck'em real hard, miss," said the gum chewing Alpha, smiling and somehow admitting that they knew the game was difficult. 

 

But Rena was determined- she took on the pose of a big league ball pitcher, planted one foot, twisted, then threw hard, her other sneaker-clad foot acting as a counterweight. The ball flew by, causing Damien to feel the slight vacuum by her movement, lightning fast. 

 

No doubt, it would have knocked all six bottles to the ground- had it hit the middle. Instead, it struck the top bottle with a mighty metallic clang, sending it hurtling into the back canvas (put there to stop its momentum and catch it).

 

"Aww, phooey!" She pouted, kicking up dust with the toe of her shoe. "I stink."

 

Damien chuckled, setting a hand on her arm. 

 

"Hey, these games are tough. I remember never getting these the first time either."

 

She looked down at him and smiled. 

 

"Oh yeah? Why don't you try, then?" 

 

Her tone wasn't hostile or teasing- but he noticed (and really found cute, he noticed) her eyes flash and sparkle at that mention. She genuinely wanted him to try- and maybe even succeed. 

 

Who is this girl, he wondered, she barely knows me. 

 

He nodded, and took a dollar out, setting it on the counter.

 

"Okay little man, gimme a second to get the Beta set ready."

 

The Beta set was the same game, only scaled down- proportioned to Damien's size- it would be unfair for him to try and knock down an Alpha- they being eight times the weight of his set. When Damien explained this to Rena, she wore confused look on her face. 

 

"Gosh," she said after a second, "I don't get it. But Damien, you are so smart. Super smart!"

 

It made him blush, and he quickly turned his attention to the three balls set before him. The first, like Rena's, sailed over harmlessly. The second, however, with. Little bit of aiming, knocked down all six.

 

Rena clapped and cheered when he did so, picking him up and swinging him around and yelling 'you did it you did it you did it'.

 

"So what prize ya want," asked the tired attendant, once Rena set her friend down. 

 

Damien, only a little dizzy, pointed to a large pink stuffed unicorn hanging by a hook on the wire walls. 

 

"Can I have that one for her?" He pointed to Rena who smiled and blushed.

 

The attendant, however, chuckled and shook her head sadly, to which Damien cocked an eyebrow.

 

"Sorry, but Alpha prizes are for Alpha games only. Sorry, yall." 

 

Damien was about to choose another Beta prize (maybe she could use it for her car or something, he thought) when the attendant spoke up again, her smile a little more hopeful.

 

"However," she continued, "seeing as how y'all're my last tonight, I thinks we can make it a little interesting." 

 

She began to pick up the fallen bottles and stacked them up. 

 

"Tell yall what, you can knock these over again in one shot, I'll let ya have the pink unicorn for ya friend."

She walked over and bent over, pressing the ball into Damien's hand. 

"You miss or don't knock'em over, you get nothin'. So, little guy,"

She looked up at Rena and then back down to Damien, the flutter of hope and possibility flying in his stomach.

"What'll it be?"

**********************

"I love it! It's so soft and squishy!" Cried Rena for what might've been the nineteenth time. She hugged and squeezed the fluffy pink unicorn close  to her and rocked back and forth.

Damien favored her with a patient smile, happy that she was happy. It was fun to this girl, a girl who had been so full of surprises tonight, enjoy herself and have almost a childlike glee. It was both refreshing and surreal- surreal by way of seeing a girl more than twice his height act like a kid, refreshing in the way that she had a sort of innocence, kindness. She had teased him tonight, yes, but it was far from any sort of malicious ridicule. In short, she was sweet, he realized- she was kind. 

She opened an eye and peered at him, suddenly self conscious. 

"What," she asked, rolling her eyes. "I'm excited about my new stuffed animal. He'll be a great pillow on my bed tonight."

"Yeah?" Damien asked, setting his hands in his pockets. "That thing is nearly the size of me."

Rena held out the fluff and examined it. It reached about her legs- he was right.

"I suppose so. Huh. Still!" She yelped, embracing the pink nightmare once again, "it's so comfy and fluffy. I love it so much! 

They rounded the corner onto the main plaza of the park. It was closing time, and all the gift shops and food vendors were closed up. Garbage crews had come out and began emptying the trash and recycle bins, some street sweepers going up and down the side walks. The summer moon was out, shining brightly. Soon it would be the autumn moon, and school would be in full swing. He had to get back to his dorm soon- there was still stuff he had to unpack.

"Well Rena," he said, checking his phone's clock, "I guess this is good night, huh?"

She looked down at him and smiled sadly.

"Yeah, I think so. Do you need a ride back to campus?"

“No, my car's in the parking lot."

"Oh good," she stopped walking, still clutching the toy tightly. "Actually," 

The notice made Damien turn his head to look at her. She was scratching her head and looking around.

"I think there's a... Oh, there it is- come on, this way!" She started to walk to the corner of the plaza.

"Where are we going?"

There's a photobooth over here. Let's take some pictures, I want to remember this night!"

Damien followed but chuckled. 

"What," he teased, "wasn't your stuffed animal memorabilia enough? Gee, aren't we being greedy..."

She turned her head and poked a tongue out at him.

"Yes, it's enough, but I want you to have something too."

"That milkshake is sure doing... 'Something' to my stomach..."

"Oh, hush you. See, that booth is still open!"

"But that's a Beta one."

"So? We can both fit in...” 

Setting her unicorn on the roof of the booth (she had apparently named it Leopold, as she said 'okay, Leopold, stay put'. Then, like trying to push laundry into a drawer that doesn't have enough room, she went in, her butt sticking out and her feet flailing. Soon enough, she was in, and she beckoned him to join her.

*******************

The whole idea of photobooths are to capture moments- it's different from the regular camera on your phones or your overpriced Nikon (yeah, sure, try and justify your expensive ass hobbies by taking stupid amounts of dumb pictures- thirty pictures of your bland Ragu-grade spaghetti sauce? yo marinara game weak af, son. #lavostrasalsasucchiacazzo )- those cameras capture individual moments- usually posed or preplanned. Photobooths, however, offer a more unique experience- it offers the possibility of movement, and discovery. Change within a short time. Some cameras take quick successions of photos now, sure, but you don't have that same spontaneity that emerges solely at photobooths. Happy accidents happen in photobooths, life happens in photobooths. For example, life happened for Rena and Damien.

Observe- their photobooths prints out six photos two times (two copies so couples can each have a copy). 

The first photo was standard- silly faces and peace signs. Collegiate fare.

The second was a serious photo, both adopting a formal (as possible) manner and affect, the only marring feature being the cracks of a telling smile at the corner of Rena's lips. 

The third is where it got interesting- as it was a Beta booth, it was quite cramped- especially for a busty girl like Rena to be in there. We might infer that Damien tripped, or turned his body wrong- it shows him falling down with an understandably alarmed expression in his eyes- and, it's not hard to see why- his vector suggested his stopping point would be the two full, already hiked up breasts that belonged to Rena. Rena herself looks teetering on the border of humor and concern.

The fourth- Damien is head first in her cleavage, and Rena is blushing as red as the hair on top of her head. 

The fifth, and this is where we see the change- both are looking at each other- maybe, we can guess, really and actually looking at each other for the first time. The light in their eyes is different. They're softer, more gentle. Green eyes turn to emeralds, brown eyes to topaz. They see not the person, not the physically, but perhaps the 'something more.' Something beyond. Both are blushing, both of them have their eyes half closed and mouths half open. They are considerably closer to each other (perhaps in every sense of the word- physically, emotionally, maybe even spiritually). 

The sixth and final- they kiss, lost in each other's passions.

The instantaneous photographs they have paid for, spitting out of the printer in completion not thirty seconds after their last photo is taken, are swept up by the wind after printing- the two, however, do not come out of the photobooth for five minutes after their photos, their capture of change, has blown away.  

 

**********************

"So," Rena asked, reaching her car that Damien has walked her to. Her skin was tingling, her finger rubbing her lip wantonly, lasting memories of the ending night, "when can I see you again?"

Damien, a little more bold, a little more confident, walked over and set a hand on her hip, crossing his legs and trying very hard to look cool.

"Well," he began, "how does next weekend sound?"

"I'd like that. Perhaps We could go for that dinner I offered tonight?"

He smiled warmly, taking out his cell phone.

"That sounds great. But only if I can buy you a milkshake after."

She smiled warmly, more than she anytime during the night. "Deal."

They exchanged phone numbers, both of them secretly adding their own favorite smiley emoticon to the end of the name. Both hoped, ironically, that the other didn't pick up on that action. 

"Great then," Damien stood back up and looked up at her. "It sounds like-"

"A date?" She finished, twirling a lock of her hair between her fingers absently. 

He nodded, satisfied.

"Yeah, a date."

Both smiled warmly, both admiring each other in the summer moonlight and stars. It was clear tonight. Rena dropped to both knees, and leaned in, offering Damien a bear hug that engulfed him completely. The embrace, warm and flush and making him feel all sorts of wonderful feelings he'd never felt before, lasted for a long time- which, to be fair, neither minded. 

She release him from the hug, still gripping him by the shoulders. She looked over at him and then, gingerly, tenderly, with the full passion of someone recently infatuated, she leaned in and kissed him once again. 

Her lips covered a good deal of his face, but he embraced it full on, doing his best to accommodate her and kiss back.

The kiss was not very brief, but was soon over.

"Damien," she began, soft as a mouse. "I had a wonderful time tonight. Thank you so much."

"I had a great time too, in fact. The best," he admitted. Then, maybe his body taking over, he said, "I can't wait to see you next week."

"I can't wait either."

They parted, Damien watching Rena drive off with a smile and a wave. Then, her car not more then a speck across the parking lot, he turned, pulled his own keys out of his pocket, and walked back to his car, flipping the keys around his finger and whistling something by Michael Bublé.

~Fin~

 

 

 

Chapter End Notes:

Here's a recipe for marinara sauce. STEP UP, SON.

 

BASIC BITCH MARINARA SAUCE

HERE'S WHAT YOUR BITCH ASS NEEDS.

12ish HEALTHY-ASS BIG TOMATOES (or equivalent amount plum tomatoes). GO TO YOUR LOCAL FARMERS MARKET AND BUY FROM THERE. BUY LOCAL, DONT BE A FUCKIN CORPORATE SHILL. 

1 BITCHIN SWEET ONION. THEY'RE MORE EXPENSIVE BUT WORTH IT. WHITE ONIONS WILL DO IN A PINCH BUT YOU'LL MISS THE FLAVORFUL CULINARY EXPLOSION THAT IS VIDALIA.

6-8 CLOVES OF GARLIC FRESH OFF THE GODDAMN BUNCH.

2 TABLESPOONS ITALIAN SEASONING. USE STORE BOUGHT IDGAF

OLIVE OIL, BUY GOOD QUALITY, NOT THAT WALMART GREEK WINO CUM.

A BOTTLE OF MARSALA COOKING WINE. SERIOUSLY, DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND GET IT- ITS DELICIOUS AND WORKS FOR OTHER ITALIAN RECIPES LIKE CANOLLI AND SHIT. A TABLEWINE IS FINE IF YOU CANT GET REAL DESSERT WINE, BUT REAL TALK- I'VE BOUGHT GOOD QUALITY MARSALA IN NAZI UTAH; HOW HARD CAN IT FUCKIN BE TO FIND ELSEWHERE?

 

1. GET TWO BIGASS POTS. START BOILIN' WATER IN ONE OF THEM.

2. WASH THE GODDAMN TOMATOES, TAKE OFF THE GREEN SHIT

3. CUT A SMALL SHALLOW 'X' IN THE BOTTOM OF THE TOMATOES. FILL ANOTHER BOWL WITH ICE WATER AND ICE CUBES, MAKE SURE THAT SHIT IS AS COLD AS YOUR EX'S HEART. SHE PROBABLY LEFT YOU BECUASE YOU'RE INTO WEIRD SHIT.

4. SET THE ICE BATH NEXT TO THE POT OF BOILING WATER- YOU NEED TO BE HUP HUP HUP WITH THIS SHIT, SO GET COMFORTABLE AND KEEP YOUR STATION CLEAR- AN UNCLUTTERED AND EFFICIENT COOK IS A GODDAMN GOOD COOK. GET READY TO BLANCHE THE EVERLIVING FUCK OUT OF THESE TOMATOES.

5. CAREFULLY PLACE HALF THE TOMATOES INTO THE BOILING WATER AND LET COOK FOR 60 SECONDS. SERIOUSLY, ONLY 60 SECONDS. THEN, LIKE A GODDAMN NINJA CYBORG WARRIOR, FISH OUT THE TOMATOES (WITH A SLOTTED SPOON, NOT YOUR HANDS, DUMBASS) AND PLUNGE THOSE DIRTY CUNTS INTO THE ICE BATH. REPEAT THE PROCESS WITH THE REST OF THE TOMATOES.

6. THE SKIN SHOULD COME OFF WAY EASY NOW, LIKE PANTIES AT A ROD STEWART CONCERT. DISCARD THE SKIN AND KNIFE OUT THE CORE. JESUS CHRIST, THAT FELT FUCKED UP TO WRITE. SET ALL THE TOMATOES IN ANOTHER CLEAN BOWL, AND START CRUSHING THEM UNTIL THERE'RE NO BIG CHUNKS LEFT. IT'LL BE MESSY, AND IT'LL PROBABLY REMIND YOU OF SOME SHIT YOU READ ON HERE. TRY NOT TO GET JIZZ IN THE TOMATOES, YOU SICK FUCK. SET ASIDE CRUSHED TOMATOES.

7. MINCE THE ONION REAL GOOD- ALSO HERE'S A TIP: YOU CAN PREVENT CRYING WHILE CUTTING ONIONS BY NOT BEING A LITTLE BITCH. 

8. HEAT UP ABOUT 2 TABLESPOONS OF OLIVE OIL OVER MEDIUM HIGH HEAT. THAT'S ABOUT 30 ML FOR ALL YOU OTHER COUNTRIES THAT HAVENT LANDED ON THE FUCKING MOON YET.

9. PUT THE ONIONS IN AND CARMELIZE THE EVERLIVING SHIT OUT OF THEM. WATER EVAPORATES FROM THE ONION AND LEAVES A PUNGENT ASS AROMA AND REALLY SWEETENS THOSE FUCKERS UP. DONT FUCKING BURN THEM OR I'LL SLAP YOU SO HARD YOU'LL CHANGE SEXES. MAKE SURE THEY ONLY GET TO BROWN.

10. WHILE THE ONIONS ARE DOIN THEIR THAAAAAANG, SMASH AND CHOP UP THE GARIC CLOVES. BIG CHUNKS LEFT OVER WONT KILL YOU, YOU PUSS. ALSO, MEASURE OUT 2 TABLESPOONS (30 ML FOR NON-MOON LANDERS) OF ITALIAN SEASONING. 

11. ONCE THE ONIONS ARE BROWNED, ADD THE GARLIC AND SEASONING- STIR THAT SHIT UP, THEN LET COOK AND BLEND FOR ABOUT TWO MINUTES- IT'LL BECOME FRAGRANT AS FUCK, AND YOUR KITCHEN WILL SMELL LIKE HOW FUCKING MONICA BELLUCCI FEELS (I ASSUME)

12. SPEAKING OF FINELY AGED ITALIAN WINE, ADD SOME SPLASHES OF YOUR MARSALA. SWING THE POT AROUND TO DEGLAZE THE SHIT YOUR BASIC ASS PROBABLY SINGED. LET THE WINE EVAPORATE OFF, LEAVING WHAT LOOKS LIKE A GROSS BROWN TURD EXPLOSION MESS. 

13. ADD THOSE CRUSHED TOMATOES LIKE YOU ADD AWKWARD TO YOUR SOCIAL INTERACTIONS. STIR THE SHIT UP TO HAVE EVERYTHING BLEND. IT'LL BE WATERY AS FUCK, BUT DONT YOU WORRY BOUT A THANG, BOO. ADD A PINCH OF SUGAR IF YOU LIKE, AS WELL AS SOME SALT AND PEPPER.

14. ONCE YOUR BRING THAT SHIT TO A BOIL, TURN YOUR FUCKIN BEASTLY OVEN TO SIMMER AND COVER THAT FUCKIN POT WITH A LID. LET THAT SHIT SIMMER OVER A LOW FLAME/HEAT FOR ABOUT 2-3 HOURS, TILL ABOUT ALL THE LIQUID BOILS OFF, OR LESS IF YOU LIKE WATERY SAUCE AND PROBABLY ALSO THINK IDA AMIN WASNT SUCH A BAD DUDE. 

15. SERVE THAT SHIT WITH SPAGHETTI AND GARLIC BREAD. CONGRATULATIONS, YOU ARE NO LONGER A WEAK ASS MARINARA SAUCE FUCKBOY.

 

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