"So she's cheating on you but you're going to just ignore it and stay with her?"

"Yes."

"Why would you do that to yourself? You know that she isn't going to be good to you."

"I don't know, I don't know. I just want someone to be with me. I don't want to have to lay around with no one with me anymore. I hate how it feels to have no one there for me."

"Do you really think that no one is there for you? Do you think that I am not right here, being there for you right now?"

"You don't understand, it's not like that, I don't mean there for me like that."

"So what do you mean then, what is being there like that supposed to mean?"

"I want someone who can be there for me on a level that's above what you can do. I can't come into my room at night and see you in my bed and just lay there and think with you, you can't do that can you, you can't lay there and think with me like not even touching each other. And I even know that you don't want to do that, when we have these conversations I can tell that—"

"What are you talking about right now, what are you even saying to me?"

"—when you talk to me you don't want to be around me anymore. I wanted for you and I to connect over this summer so I talk to you so much and you seem so impossible to interact with, who are you even, what did I do wrong, I don't understand any—"

"Why didn't you tell me any of this beforehand? You always seem so distant to me, you never seem all there when we talk anymore. If we're not sitting in silence you're telling me about Sofia or something that happened with your family—"

"—more I miss the old you so much. I miss what you and I used to be, you know I've never had better advice than the time that you told me that a relationship isn't about being friends, it's about being lovers, because I feel like that changed Sofia and I so much when I shifted my attitude toward her and—"

"—so what the hell's your major malfunction then?"

"—and, and... I don't know anymore."

"Why didn't you just tell me, then?"

"I don't want you to get tired of me. I'm so scared that you'll get exhausted of me, with us always talking every day and going out to the movies every single weekend, how could you not be drained from that? I never leave you alone."

"If I was drained we wouldn't be speaking right now. I enjoy every moment that I spend with you Jade, I don't want you to think that I'm never not happy when I'm around you. This summer has been one of the best in my life."

"This summer has been too good to me, I don't know what it's going to be like when it ends."

"We can cross that bridge when we get there."

"What's going to happen when you have to move and it's just me and Sofia, when I can't come to you for advice anymore?"

"Have you ever heard of texting or Skype or facetiming, you knew that was a thing right?"

"Yeah, I know all about that, but I'm so much happier when we see each other in person. I feel that we can share a bond that's special compared to what you and I are saying to each other over the phone. What if you're on the toilet while you're texting me?, I wouldn't know that. That just totally ruins the moment for me."

"Oh my God, is that actually what you're going to be stressing out about right now? What if I told you I would never use the bathroom while I text you. Or better yet we can only facetime so you know where I am all the time, does that help?"

"Okay I didn't mean that far, we can text, I'll take your word."

"Really, I promise, I'll help you with Sofia whenever you want."

"That's good."

"But listen, I'm going to really tell you the truth here, and I don't want you to get upset about anything, because you're my best friend and I wouldn't ever hurt you if it wasn't going to help you."

"You want me to break up with her, I know."

"Please, you need to do it, if you let her control you like this then you're never going to be happy, all you'll do it hurt yourself over and over and what happens when you've been hurt so much that you can't feel yourself anymore?"

"What happens when I already can't feel anything. As of lately I've just been so suspended in my own guilt over what I did to Sofia that I don't know if I'll ever feel again."

"Listen to yourself, you seriously think that what you did means you deserve what's happening right now?"

"It's just karma."

"Fuck karma, what the hell, you know that's bullshit right? You don't deserve a single shred of what you've been putting up with. I don't care about what you did to Sofia, no one cares about that, it wasn't her fault either way. You need to reevaluate where you've put yourself if you actually sit down and think you deserve anything bad, ever."

"Don't try to tell me that what I did was okay."

"Sofia pushed you, Jade, how can you not see that? Sometimes your actions aren't on your own behalf, and you'll do something you really regret. But you need to understand that what you did was by no means your own fault in any way."

"Stop saying stupid things."

"What else am I supposed to tell you? I'm not going to tell you that you're right, because right now you're just wrong."

"Whatever."

"I'm sorry."

"..."

"Jade."

"..."

"I just want you to be happy. That sounds really dumb, and it's a cliche thing to say, but I want you to be happy so much that it physically hurts me sometimes. Seeing you like this could actually kill me."

"Well I don't know what you expected when you decided to start saying stupid stuff like that, were you expecting me to just smile and tell you that it makes sense to me and that I would just break up with Sofia?"

"I want you to break up with Sofia, so yes, that's sort of what I was expecting."

"Okay well let me tell you right now, I'm not going to break up with Sofia, and I'm not going to let you talk me into it. Why would you try to push me into that?"

"Do you think you're dependent?"

"..."

"Do you?"

"Probably yeah. I understand that what I'm doing is going to be the wrong decision, but I want her and I to pull through this, I've been with her so long and she's one of the most amazing people I've ever known, I want her and I to pull through this and mend our relationship. I don't want to be alone again."

"You won't be alone, you'll have me, I promise you that I'll be there for you, whenever you want, we can lay down together and think and not even touch each other, we can just lay there and think if that's what you want us to do. Please."

"I'm just so lost."

"I can tell. But I want to help you find yourself."

"I know where I am, I'm here right now, I'm here with you."

"I don't mean like that, I mean I want you to find yourself like... find yourself mentally. Don't make me sound like a big idiot, don't make me explain myself!"

"Alright, okay, you can do whatever you want. You don't have to have me stopping you from doing what you have to do."

"Thank you. Do you think you can do it now?"

"No. I'm sorry, I know that you're trying to help me right now but I don't want to do it, so I'm not going to let you tell me what to do."

"Then I hope that you can maybe sleep on that decision, and think long and hard about what you're choosing to do. Because you heard it from your best friend that you're just going to end up hurt, and upset and sad, and I know that your biggest fear is to be alone, but that's how you're going to be if you continue down this path you're setting up for yourself."

"..."

"..."

"Why would you say that? What's your problem?"

"Remember when I told you that I would never hurt you unless I knew it would help you, and I want to help you and make you stop hurting right now really—"

"Maybe you need to listen to yourself, you're the one who needs to do some listening. If you actually think that saying that would ever help me then your efforts are just so misplaced right now."

"Why are you so mad whenever I tell you the truth to the best of my ability? Any time I manage to muster up some statement that I think will be helpful to you, you react so negatively and you just never are happy are you with what I say to you? You're never going to be satisfied with what I say."

"I'm sorry."

"Well whenever it comes to the point that any single thing I say can and will be used against me in some form or another then it makes conversation really discouraging. Don't turn this into a minefield of bad things I could say that are going to set you—"

"I'm sorry."

"—off. I can't be given the burden of making sure everything I say is sugarcoated and ensured to make you happy, what—"

"I'm sorry, okay! Why don't you just leave me alone already? I'm pretty sure I've made my choice here, I don't want to hear what you're saying to me anymore, okay, why can't we just end this conversation right now?"

"I don't want to end this conversation with you stuck on some dumb idea that you deserve anything bad that happens to you."

"Leave that alone, who cares, who cares if I deserve anything, leave it alone."

"Fine, whatever, what are we going to do today then?"

"I don't think we're going to be doing anything today. I'm going home."

"Wow, are you really going to take it that negatively and go home? Is that seriously what you're going to do right now? Don't act like a child, seriously, please."

"I just want to go home and think. And I want to do it alone, not with someone laying next to me thanks, so let me do that. We've talked for a long time now and I just want to think about it, okay? I'm not mad."

"You're not mad?"

"I'm not mad."

"Okay, fine, if you really promise you aren't angry with me then go home. I promise that I wasn't trying to make you mad at me, I just wanted you to understand where I'm coming from."

"Alright. Thanks for talking to me. Love you."

"I love you too."