“Jamila? She did it?” Alvin said, unable to hide his own suspension of disbelief.

“No, she means a Titan used to be her own Wendy,” Jamila replied, surprised by Alvin’s misunderstanding.

Cassie had her head hung low, looking up and nodded, “ She’s right. Alvin, do you really think I have the perfect life?”

 Alvin answered quickly, without taking a moment to ponder, “ What’s not perfect? You’re tall, beautiful and a very intelligent girl from a loving family. Most people would kill for that kind of life.”

Cassie smiled but Alvin could see the sorrow within those eyes, filling up with her.

“ Maybe now but always. My parents always loved me, that was clear but…” She fished out her phone and showed him her lock screen to remind him of a very different period of her life.

Alvin, in his own mist covered rant had forgotten ugly duckling Cassie. “ Well, you still seem happy, couldn’t be too bad could it?”

Cassie sniffed loudly, shaking her head as if Alvin couldn’t be more wrong, “People called me Train Tracks Cassie, because I had braces and they  thought it was funny to make fun of me for it”

She chuckled, almost nostalgic about the past, odd since most people wouldn’t hark for a time when they got picked on.

‘But they never did it for long, I managed to find a way to blend in and soon only I remembered the moniker they gave me.”

“ Then one summer this girl,” She tapped her phone screen, her nails clicking and clacking against the screen, “ grew 30 feet, gained two cup sizes, lost her puppy fat  and when she came to school ,everyone wanted to know who the pretty freshman was.”

  “ Okay, then that creates the Cassie we see here?” Alvin asked with hope.

   “Not quite Alvin,” Cassie answered.

 “But I thought I was free of the bullying because you never see the beautiful person as the victim. Boy was I wrong,” Cassie let out an anguished laugh.

 “ Who would pick on you? You’re the queen of FDR high, you could probably get yourself carried in a sedan if you asked,” Alvin replied.

 “ Not quite,” Jamila said as she came closer, standing by Alvin.  

“ I might be,” Cassie smiled weakly although she hated the thought of being the school queen.

“ Before this though, I had to deal with Gail.”

“Gail Winters? The cheerleading captain? Isn’t she gone?” Gail Winters was a name nearly everyone knew, a very prominent and outgoing girl loved by all..

 A little lump formed within Cassie , the mere mention of her name filled her mind with uneasiness at best, panic at worst. She had worked hard to keep that down, buried it so deep only she and a select few would remember. Now here she was, plunging her hands into the darkness and pulling out the very demons she fought to keep down.

 “Long gone but I still remember her,” Cassie’s eyes hazy with gloom.

 “You don’t have to talk about it if it still hurts,” Alvin moved along the sink , as close as he could get to his friend. He couldn’t reach out and touch, the gap between them was too large for that but he sat as close as he could.

 “ I do actually. It hurts me to hear you think of me as this perfect girl,” Cassie’s voice was heavy with disappointment and sorrow as she locked her fingers together.

“ I’m sorry but you carry that persona so well, the aura you give off suggests all that,” Alvin replied, his attempt at lifting her up barely taking flight.

“ Which is why I need you to hear it from me,” Cassie paused as painful memories dived in and out of her consciousness.

“It started back when I just joined the cheerleading squad,”

**********

3 years ago, 2020

 Cassie tugged at her teal Adidas sports bra in the changing room, unaccustomed to how much skin it revealed. She had issues over the whole outfit, a pair of matching shorts which showed most of her pale legs.

  She had been one of the earliest to arrive and change but after looking at herself in the mirror, found it hard to even step outside in such clothes. Why had Gail even requested for it? It was so discomforting to attract attention this way, she could imagine boys undressing her with their eyes if they so much as glanced at her.

 “ Hey newbie, you okay?” Cassie turned to see a ginger tanned blue eyed girl, slightly shorter than her  in a fuschia sports bra and green shorts, a strong clash of colours.

“Just not used to showing so much skin,” Cassie answered timidly.

“Really? You?” Her new acquaintance shot back, skeptical over this.

Cassie nodded, “ I only just got into the swing of things, sports bras and shorts are new to me,” she smiled sheepishly.

 The redhead extended her hand, offering Cassie a handshake which she accepted, “ Well Miss ‘Just got into the swing of things’ I’m Jamila and we better get going or we’ll be late.”

 “Well I’m Cassie,” She replied as they went down the corridor and out on to the field, the afternoon sun. From what she could see, all the new girls were dressed the same as she was, a rainbow of sports bra and shorts all across while the senior girls were standing across them in the white and  blue uniforms, likely discussing the quality of the new girls.

 At least the Titan seniors were, the Amazons and normals were huddling together in a corner and having their own separate group talk but less enthusiastic than . Cassie counted about twelve of them compared to

 Cassie and Nadya took their seats with the other Titans, ten of them in total while a smaller group of Amazons and normals sat in front of them, noticeably less than the senior group which had far more of the smaller sizes.

   “ Ah, thanks for being late,” A tall green eyed brunette Titan stepped out from the senior group, indicating towards Jamila and Cassie.

“Sorry,” Cassie whimpered.

“Don’t do it again,” She glowered but quickly switched back to a more sunnier disposition.

Everyone there knew who she was, Gail Winters needed no introduction. She didn’t bother with one anyway.

“So,” She beamed at the new girls while the other stood behind her.

“Congratulations on being picked. I don’t need to tell you the privilege of being a cheerleader but you have to  earn your uniform,” She explained, Cassie finally understanding why she was in such skimpy exercise outfits.

“Now, get up for warm ups,” clapping her hands.

*******

“Sounds alright to me. Where’s Nadya, you only brought up Jamila?”

“Nadya came along later but that’s not the point,”Jamila replied.

“What do you know about Gail?” Cassie asked Alvin.

Alvin honestly knew very little, his position on the valence shell of the social circle meant he picked up very little.Even so, he had picked up a little information on her.

“Just that everyone loved her. The standard ‘ girls want to be her, guys want to be with her’ thing going on, does that sound like Gail?”

 Cassie nodded but it didn’t seem like Alvin had gotten it right, there was more to it.

“On a good day, Gail is like that cool motivational speaker you think is too good to be true. On a bad day, you know it isn’t true. Gail was and probably still is a demon in angel robes.”

*******

6 weeks after making the team

“Nadya, Tessa, Taylor and Cassie will form the base while Jamila and Carrie act as support for me, the tip of our pyramid,” Gail finished off a lengthy detailed plan involving a lot of cartwheels in the lead up to the pyramid.

 “I have a question Gail,” Cassie raised her hand studiously. All the seniors, especially the non-Titan side looked at her with wide-eyed, slack jawed shock. Cassie felt uneasy, as if she had crossed some imaginary taboo line.

 “ I’m sorry?” Gail shot her a look of disbelief, darker emotions bubbling with the captain.

“ A question,” Cassie timidly put down her hand.

“Okay, ask it,” Gail’s blood simmering now. As Cassie spoke, each word only intensified the heat.

  “Your plan is good but maybe we should find a way to include the smaller girls. It’s a good plan but we couldn’t we use everybody we have?” She answered with a slight shrug of her shoulders.

 “Why would I do that?” Gail asked, walking over to Cassie deathly calm, like a shark closing on its prey.

“ B-because,” Cassie stood up, feeling the danger in the air.

“ You have all these Amazon and normal girls, it would be a shame if we didn’t utilise them to the fullest. I know we’re big enough as Titans but you didn’t just pick Titans,” Gail stopped just a few feet away from Cassie. While Gail came up to Cassie’s nose, she had a real commanding aura about her; an aura that could bridge any difference in height.

“ So you’re saying, I shouldn’t have these girls here?” Gail paused, Cassie knew she was being baited but knowing it didn’t save her from falling into the trap.

“No no , I-just thought- ah!” She screamed as Gail grabbed her by the ponytail and yanked down. Cassie tried to pull free but she didn’t think her roots would hold ,her only option was to fall to her knees.

 “ Look at you, I haven’t even decided if you should wear the blue and white yet here you are, telling me what to do,” Gail ignored Cassie pleas to stop, something about the pain and how sorry she was.

Letting go, Cassie thought it was over but Gail pushed it further by grabbing and twisting Cassie’s nipple then pulling hard on the nub.

 “Gail! P-please stop!” Cassie’s eyes watered , what had she done to deserve it? Worse, why was no one jumping in to stop this?

“Fine,” Gail released her grip on Cassie, letting her fall by her side.

Cassie rubbed her sore breast while Gail issued her warning.

“Never question me Gissel. You’re nothing right now and if you get in my way, you’ll be nothing as long as you call yourself a cheerleader or student here. Got it?”

Cassie nodded, never had she felt more ashamed of herself.

*******

“That’s horrible!” Alvin was at a serious loss for words.

“ Why didn’t you help her? You could have stopped Gail?” Alvin asked Jamila who looked on guiltily.

“ You never saw Gail. She has a way with people, paralyzing them with fear,” Jamila said.

Cassie looked up, “ That was not the last time either, Gail made me her personal target for questioning her.”

*******

2  weeks after the suggestion

“God damn it Gissel!” Gail deftly picked herself off the ground,  left arm bruised but the real salt in the wound was Cassie’s failure to even hold up the pyramid well.

Cassie got up and backed away instinctively.

“Sorry Gail, I didn’t mean it!” She repeated to her as Gail advanced on her.

Cassie was sent reeling to the ground as Gail slapped her with all the strength she could muster, Gail on her the moment she got up.

“ You’re sorry? Now it's just a little purple bruise but tomorrow? Can I count on you not to hurt me or the rest of us?” She gestured at the other girls, scared stiff and not doing anything help. Shaking from slap, Cassie glanced at them before turning back to Gail.

 “ P-please its an accident,” She whimpered, hand against cheek, cradling it to ease the pain.

 “ Accident…” Gail spat at her, a glob of clear spit hitting Cassie on the forehead.

  Cassie recoiled in disgust, wiping it off but the damage was done as she crumpled to the floor in a crying heap.

“Take five everyone,” Gail said as she looked at Cassie without feeling any pity or remorse,just disappointment.

******

“You never told anyone? Not even an adult?” Alvin asked.

“ You said it yourself Alvin, what good did it do? I did tell them but Gail’s father knew people on the school board. They turned a blind eye to it, the school didn’t need a scandal on their hand,” Cassie’s stomach churned uneasily.

 “ So what did you do?”

 “She quit,” Jamila said, not proudly but frankly.

 “But I don’t blame her for it, I’d do the same too,” She  added on.

“If only Gail made it easy. Getting out was horrible. She just had to find a way to twist the knife in even further,” Cassie scoffed.

*******

6 weeks after the suggestion

“So Gissel, what brings you here?” Gail hadn’t expected Cassie to approach her, not alone and in public for sure, doing it in the canteen with all of her friends here was just asking for another serving of humiliation. She thought if Cassie were gutsy enough to try, she’d do it in a more private setting.

 “ I-I just want to tell you that I quit. You won’t have to see me at cheerleading again,” Cassie wasn’t sure if she was loud enough to hear but as Gail chewed the mushy meal served to her, that is all she could hear. Everyone of Gail’s friends just watched the standoff between the two.

 Gail stopped chewing and swallowing, giving Cassie a slow sardonic clap while her friends laughed awkwardly.

“ Finally realised you weren’t good enough eh? Can’t say I’m surprised, you lasted longer than I give a scaly girl like you,” Gail took great pleasure in watching this unfold, the look of pure unadulterated shock on Cassie’s mug.

“ Yeah I know all about your days as an ugly duckling,” She got out her phone and a few swipes and presses, she got to the the picture she wanted: a picture of Cassie from the middle school yearbook.

“ Train Tracks Cassie right? Should have stayed with those bookworms. You may look alright now but girl ,you’re no cheerleader. Who are you trying to fool?” Gail laughed hard, watching Cassie swallow everything she did, the look of pain and anguish, the desire to hit back but knowing she full well couldn’t even work up the courage to do it.

 What she did do, was to turn her back to Gail and company , walking off with her head hung in shame. She did however, fire a parting a shot.

“Break a leg Gail, break a leg.”

******

 “But you’re here, cheerleading captain and de facto head of the student body. What happened?” Alvin enquired, something didn’t add up.

 Cassie smiled a little, lips curled at a gentle incline.

“ She literally did what I told her to do: break a leg. I didn’t know about it until,” he gestured at Jamila who chuckled heartily.

 “I told her, I felt bad about what happened to her.”

*******

4 months after quitting

“Stop dragging me,I don’t want to be here!” The blue eyed brunette tugged at Jamila, trying to break free of her grip on her forearm but Jamila wasn’t about to relent. All she got was a hush from the librarian, insisting she keep her voice down.

 “ Cassie, you still remember me?” Cassie looked up from her book, a dog eared copy of Parallel Worlds by Michio Kaku, it was expensive as sheets of car sized paper went but she got it made and better yet, got him to sign it for her, the signature large enough for her to make out in clear detail.

“Hi Jamila, sorry we don’t talk much. I haven’t seen you since I left the team.Who is your friend?” Cassie knew where she had seen the other girl, a hanger on with Gail’s entourage although she was in the same year as the other two.

 “ Nadya,” She said in between grunts while trying to free herself but failing.

“Damn , you’re strong for a little girl,” Nadya wheezed before giving up.

“ She’s here to tell you some good news, maybe even wonderful news if you really like it,” Jamila and Nadya sat opposite Cassie who watched them curiouser than the proverbial cat.

 “ Why can’t you tell her? It doesn’t matter who does it,” Nadya said as Jamila let go of her.She thought of bolting but Jamila would have caught her anyway.

“ Because you’re her crony that’s why!” Jamila chided her.

 Nadya rolled her eyes hard, “ Like you never pretended to be with her?”

Cassie watched the exchange, bemused but wondering where things were going with it.” Sorry but what did you want to tell me?”

Jamila pushed Nadya, egging her on.

“Gail broke her leg. She went skiing in winter and took a bad turn, crashed into some big conifers and twist her knee really bad. Basically, she won’t be cheering for the remainder of her school year,”

“Good for her,” Cassie said without even skipping a beat, no tell tale signs of joy or schadenfreude.

“ We want you back, join us Cassie,” Jamila offered.

“I thought you all hated me?” Cassie was very puzzled by this, shamed all throughout her time there and now they wanted her in ? Sounded like a very elaborate hoax to her.

“ We didn’t. Your idea, using the smaller girls as part of the act had a lot of people rooting for you but the problem was we all assumed Gail to be some hugely popular girl until Nadya here let slip she thought Gail was a-”

 “-bitch-” Nadya summed up her thoughts on Gail in one word.

Jamila nodded, “ That led to this one heart to heart where we just poured out our thoughts , telling what we hated about her. Then it led to you and how badly you were treated for your idea and we realised how great it was ,the Amazons and normals said they wanted you in and then suddenly we had this vote and you’re back!”

She said it giddy with excitement.

 “How do I know this isn’t a joke?”

Nadya took out her phone and showed Cassie  a picture of Gail on crutches, “ It’s legit, trust me.”

“I’ll give it a try but if I suspect you’re all pulling my leg, I’ll never come back.”

*****

“And as the rest as they say is history?”

Cassie shook her head , “I couldn’t resist seeing her one last time.”

“To stick it to her?”

Cassie chuckled but not out of joy, there was something else within it.

“I did.”

*****

3 weeks after returning

“Wow, when I said break a leg, I thought you would ignore it like my other suggestion.”

Gail looked up from her seat, grabbing her crutch ,extremely displeased to even see Cassie, all decked in the white and blue uniform, something she could once wear.

“ What do you want Gissel? Come here to gloat?”

Cassie nodded, “ Correct. I just came here to see the sorry state you’re in , heard most of your brown nosers left you and I see it's true. You’re all alone.”

“ Okay, time for you to go,” Gail said but Cassie was having none of that, she was going to enjoy the reversal of power.

“ I also came to update you on your former team. We’re a much happier and more united one since we let the smaller girls have a bigger part in our routines AND dropped the whole ‘you can’t wear the uniform until you’re worthy’ routine either.”

Gail snorted, “ Congratulations brat, you’re doing well. Now leave me alone, I got to catch up on some schoolwork.”

 Cassie didn’t move.

“ What, you want me to apologise? Offer some heartfelt explanation because I treated you like crap because when I was little, my mom didn’t love me enough? Grow up little girl, this is who I am!Nothing else to add.Now shoo!” She waved  Cassie away, bitter and defeated despite the outburst.

If she thought Cassie would back off, Cassie did. But first, she reared back and spat a huge wet glob of spit right on Gail’s eye.

“ Fuck!” Gail cursed as reached for a tissue to wipe off the disgusting fluid.

“ You bitch,” Gail yelled but Cassie had already turned and walked off, content with her final act.

******

“ Yet you don’t want me to let Wendy squirm?” Alvin could spot the hypocrisy easily.

“ I can see why but it felt hollow. I thought it would be enough but it didn’t feel like much after awhile and I didn’t like what I did. It felt wrong. I should have just let her be, move on with my life.”

Alvin wasn’t convinced, “ No I think its fine. You gave her what she deserved.Wendy can burn for all I care.”

Cassie sighed, she knew what she could do and what was beyond her reach.

“ I can’t force you to forgive her but I can advise you. I kind of want you to patch things up because she is your sister no matter how much you try to avoid it and because I’m an only child; I just find the idea of having a sibling so cool , someone to look out for you and be your friend. Just give it some thought?”

Cassie looked at him hopefully, Alvin said nothing but nodded. She took it as a sign of progress, that was enough for her.

At home, Alvin found Wendy in front of the television, watching her favourite anime Suska Oni, based off a manga set in a pugilistic world based off the mythology of the Far East.

“ I like Tephra, she’s a real badass,” He commented on the scene as he plopped himself down on the worn out couch next to her, their sides almost touching. It was closest he had ever willingly been with her.

“ So do I, being able to control fire and lava is just so cool,” Wendy said without thinking. When she did think,  she realised who she was talking to.

 She looked at him, shocked he was even sitting next to her. Alvin looked up at her , equally silent. He tried to find the words to say but it was hard to say it to Wendy, to let it all go.

“ I can’t forget everything you did to me, too much pain and suffering to just forget. However,” That gave Wendy hope, a knot in her stomach loosening.

“ I am willing to let you try. Let you make it up to me. I don’t know how long it will take or how much it’ll require but I am open to it. If you’re fine with it.”

Wendy pulled him close, embracing her stepbrother in the first warm hug she had ever given him in years. She sniffled and even shed a few happy tears but it was here, she finally got herself the chance to be redeemed.

Alvin briefly struggled as he instinctively fought off the urge to resist, reminding himself Cassie was not trying to crush him.

“ I won’t disappoint you. In fact,” She said as an idea came in, letting go of Alvin.

“ Lets start with your unrequited feelings for Cassie.”

“What?” Alvin exclaimed.