Nick rode the twisting water slide with glee equal to that of a child going to see their first horror movie. There was happiness there, but the loads of fear piled on top masked it. The key difference between a horror movie and Nick’s little rollercoaster is that there is very little chance you will actually get hurt going to the movies. Yes, a lamp might fall on your head, or someone pulls the fire alarm, everyone panics, someone pushes you down, and you are then trampled to death by the mass of people desperately seeking safety, but that is very rare.

            But Nick had no idea where this pipe was going to go, and what he was going to have to deal with to get there. Was he going to swim the rest of the journey? Would he be dumped out in the ocean, or sent to some sewage treatment plant? Was he ever going to see the light of day again?

            He probably was, considering he was immortal and still had a wish left, but Nick was in a dramatic mood, and so thought to ask these questions anyway.

            A sharp left turn sent him sliding along the top of the pipe. A stomach turning flip came next, followed by five quick zigzags, each of which seeming to have no real purpose at all.

            Then finally, after some amount of time had passed (it is easy to loose track of such things when you are on a water slide no one was ever intended to ride on) the pipe opened, and the slightest rays of artificially created, and slightly yellow light appeared.

            “Yay!” Nick said happily as he was pushed forward, out of the darkness and into his next destination. He flew out of the pipe, soring through the air for a brief second, water droplets falling all around him.

            The room was dark, and pretty dingy even by sewer standards. There was a single light bulb in the corner, the filament spewing the hazy light forth. A door had been placed on the far wall of the room, constructed completely of iron. It looked as if it was meant to cage some horrific beast from the depths of hell.

In reality, the door’s main purpose was to keep out the homeless who had consistently found ways into the sewer for hundreds of years. Mayor Egor III had proclaimed on his election day that he would once and for all rid the world of the homeless. His plan to do so was to put massive doors, like this one, throughout the sewer system. His reasoning was simply this, “Since the homeless come from the sewers, all we have to do is block them out!”

At first, the good people of Idiocracity, the city that Nick was now under but more on that later, had reacted badly to the mayor’s plan, but soon grew to love it. One wealthy business man was quoted as saying, “Hey, it would explain the smell.”

Of course Mayer Egor’s plan had resulted in a total of 0 homeless people being repelled back to their smelly underground city. When this statistic was announced, Egor held a press conference and stated, “Well shit, we forgot to cover up those man holes, didn’t we? That must be it.” And so, the issue was dropped, and never truly resolved.

Nick continued to fall, but soon landed on a hard, metallic surface below. Face first of course. He stood up, shacking some of the water from his body. The small fly had landed on a grate, allowing most of the water to run right through, while keeping his solid body out.

“Wow,” Nick said as he walked onto the concrete floor and off of the grate. “Something helpful actually happened! What are the odds?”

             Apart from the iron door, which Nick had little chance of opening; there were only two exits from the room. One was the way he dropped in, which wasn't the most appealing option in the world, and the other was a storm drain above. This seemed like the simplest, and least messy, solution.

            Once Nick’s wings dried, a task that didn’t take nearly as long as he had expected, the small fly jumped into the air, annoyingly buzzing out of the drain, and into the heavenly light of day once again. He breathed the fresh air deeply, and allowed the brutal sun to coat his entire body in its cozy embrace. Finally, after hours and hours of not so pleasant torture, he was free again!

            But, where exactly was he? Before him stretched a high brick wall, which was completely hideous in all regards. It wasn’t even that nice type of brick that people pay for in their homes so that it looks old fashioned. These were the old bricks that had been put in at the dawn of civilization, and hadn’t seen soap since. Slimy, with a thick coating of gunk, the wall seemed to stretch on and on.

            To his right was more brick, where the wall made a sharp turn forming a dead end. There was a dumpster situated there, and Nick could just make out the silhouette of some tiny black bugs hovering around it. Not the type of crowd Nick wanted to fall back in with. His thoughts were briefly polluted with the image of that first fly once again.

            Quickly he shook away the vomit inducing atrocities of the fly, and looked to his left. He couldn’t make out much, since a fly’s eyes weren’t the greatest in the animal kingdom, but he could tell that there was more light then there was in this dark corridor.

            “So,” he said to no one in particular. He was growing used to talking to himself. “On my right is a bunch of sexy flies that will probably want to do stuff to my gorgeous body, and on my left is the inviting sensation of sunlight. Which one to pick?” He was moving before he could even finish the thought.

            He buzzed out into the open with a passion unmatched by any fly before him. When the world finally opened up to him, and he was allowed to see where he was, he was left breathless. For once in his life, he was at a loss of words, for before him stood the vast, sprawling metropolis that was Idiocracity.