Jack woke at around midday, fully clothed on top of the bed. Despite everything, he felt refreshed, almost as if what had had happened that morning was a peculiarly surreal dream, but one that had brought him back into the bosom of his family… and mended some of the fractures in his relationship with his parents.

He was worried for his Grandad’s health; the idea of him slipping away was an upsetting and complicated one, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it. His grandfather had lived to a good age, and lived through so much of history; both the good, and the bad. All they could do now was wait…

He could hear his mother boiling the kettle in the kitchen, no doubt for a pot of tea, so she was wide awake and busying herself.

Sitting upright, he swung his legs out from under the covers and yawned, picking up the phone he had basically flung onto his bedside table, and noticed immediately that there were notifications from messenger.

Unlocking the screen, he maximised the window and saw two conversations in bold; one from Delon… and one from Penny.

His heart skipped a beat, but he forced himself to read Delon’s message first, out of protocol. Head over heart.

The first time stamp was from just before 9am. 

D: Hey dude, I take it you managed to convince your folks

Then there were two together, timed at just past 11. 

D: Jack, you ok?

D: Haven’t seen Penny in today either, just hoping you’re alright, mate?

He quickly typed a response. 

J: Grandad ill overnight so went to hospital this morn

J: Not coming in today so code green

He really should have written more, to clarify things and make sure Delon was fully abreast of the situation, but his heart wouldn’t let him wait any longer.

Swiping Delon’s convo off the screen, he tapped on Penny’s chat icon.

P: I’m so sorry, Jack

P: I know I let you down

P: I understand why you don’t want to talk to me

P: I am truly sorry

Jack’s heart dropped.

What had happened?

He didn’t know how to even begin to respond…

“Jackie, do you want a cup of tea? Jaaaack?” he heard his mother yell out.

He just sat there, phone frozen in hand, unable to respond to either development.

He heard the sound of footsteps as his Mum approached. Pressing the button on the side of his phone, he turned off the screen just before she swept the door open.

“Ah good, I thought you were awake,” she said, in a surprisingly upbeat manner. “Cup of tea?”

“Yes please,” he said, accentuating his reply with a drawn-out yawn to confirm that, yes, he had only just arisen.

“How are you feeling?” she asked, draping a tea-towel over her arm.

“Tired,” he said, glancing out at the garden through the bedroom window, “How about you?” he asked, turning back to her.

“I’m… coping… I guess. It’ll all be alright in the end, just got to give it time,” she replied, giving him a weak smile, then turned on her heel and headed back to the kitchen. “Now get up and have something to eat, will you?”

Jack didn’t reply, instead he opened up his phone as soon as she was clear, and stared at the chat screen.

I let you down

I am truly sorry

Oh, Penny…

His stomach growled as he drank the hot tea, standing next to the dining table with his Mum close by.

She was quiet, reading the paper, occasionally looking out of the window with a sort of fixed stare, very much lost in thought.

He fixed himself a bowl of cereal and ate it slowly, acutely aware of the crunching sound as each fresh jawful punctuated the silence.

“I might go for a walk round the park or something,” she announced, “It’s been forever since I last did that.”

“Uhuh,” he mumbled, finishing off his mouthful and letting the spoon rest in the bowl momentarily.

“Do you want to come with me?”

He didn’t, to be honest. Not that he didn’t want to support her, but more that he wanted time alone. He knew she’d probably want to talk, and he just wasn’t sure he could take it. His mother had a tendency to interrogate rather than communicate, and he wasn’t feeling up to that particular challenge.

“I don’t know… probably not,” he replied, “…sorry,” taking another spoonful.

She shrugged, but clearly it didn’t bother her too much.

“It’d be good to get some fresh air,” she said, more to herself than to Jack.

He was too preoccupied with worrying about Penny’s message. How to respond. What it even meant?

“I’ll be back in a bit,” she said, interrupting his thoughts. He’d been lost in his own little world, and hadn’t even noticed her putting her boots and coat on.

“I love you, Mum,” he said without thinking. It even took him by surprise a little bit.

“I love you too, sweetheart,” she said, her eyes going slightly dewy. She gave him a kiss on the forehead, and then headed to the door “I’ve got my phone with me, I’ll be back in a bit.”

Jack nodded, and his mother closed the door behind her.

He finished his cereal, which had begun to turn to mush after sitting in the milk too long, and then rinsed the bowl clean in the sink.

He wandered back to his room, collapsed on the bed, and reached out to grab his phone, which he had left on charge.

There were a couple of new messages from Delon:

D: Oh shit, I hope he’s ok?

D: It’s good you’re not in school, but hope you’re alright

D: Keep me posted anyway dude

Obviously, nothing further from Penny.

He felt absolutely awful, not necessarily for her or for himself, but for the situation itself. He had been so looking forward to seeing her, what could possibly have happened? Had she chickened out? Did she somehow not care as much as she had made out?

What about the kiss, the things they’d last shared? Had it not meant anything?

He had to say something. He had to find out. Just initiate a conversation, comfort her, make things right.

He tapped on the arrow that loaded the on-screen keyboard and began to type.

J: I don’t know what happened but of course I still want to talk to you

J: It’s ok

J: I’m ok

He didn’t know what else to put. There were so many conclusions he could jump to. It made his head hurt just to think about it.

After reading and re-reading his replies for a while, half-hoping that the little icon would move down to show that they had been read, he had to close the app for his own sanity’s sake.

He checked his emails instead, realising with a flash that today was Thursday.

The email from ALDA was right there. That lurid yellow logo.

Hi Jack!

Your glasses and/or contact lenses are available collection today from 10am. 

He’d completely forgotten about his trip to the optical department.

Absolute life-saver, and just in time to replace the pair he’d lost the day before. He simply had to find a way to go and get them.

If his mother got back, it’d be tricky to try and explain why he was going out for a walk right after she’d just gone for one. That, and yet more lying to her face. Better to leave a note and head out ASAP, and if there was a problem, wing things later.

He quickly checked to see that he had his bag, wallet and keys to hand, then grabbed the post-it pad and pen from next to the fridge. Quickly scrawling something about her being right about needing the fresh air after all, he slapped it on the fridge, threw a coat over his shoulders, and forced his trainers on, crumpling the battered heels even more than they already were. After a quick spot-check to make sure all the windows were fastened shut and the back door was dead-bolted, he headed out of the house, and got up to speed.

It was another blustery day, but clear enough, with a few high-flying clouds. A few bits of rubbish were dancing along the road, a reminder that this was not the idyllic suburb of years gone by.

ALDA was a good 45 minute walk away, but Jack’s legs felt good, almost like he’d gotten a second wind for today. It wasn’t like he felt he was in control of his destiny or anything, but getting to the superstore was both a welcome distraction from his feelings and much-needed motivation to not mope around the house.

He made steady progress, occasionally checking his phone to see if his Mum had texted him… or if Penny had seen his messages.

She had not.

Eventually the superstore loomed from around a bend in the road, and he traversed the car park, watching carefully for the enormous Alpha cars that threatened to flatten unsuspecting Beta pedestrians despite several designated, highly-visible crosswalks.

The store itself was fairly quiet for a weekday, just a handful of shoppers of both scales; little old Beta pensioners in mobility scooters, Alpha stay-at-home mums rushing around with tiny kids in tow, and the occasional college student, no doubt nursing a hangover.

He made his way over to the optical department, flanking the spill-over tills that only opened at the weekend, making sure to keep his distance from the aisles as it was not uncommon for an enormous trolley to suddenly shoot out and broadside an unsuspecting Beta.

The half-size counter he arrived at was unoccupied, but it only took a moment for the Alpha optician to spot him there and walk over from his own section.

The guy wasn’t the biggest Alpha Jack had ever seen, but still easily 11ft tall, and on the portly side. He looked to be about mid-thirties, with an unkempt-looking beard and thick-framed glasses.

“What can I do for you today, sir?” he asked, bending at the waist and looming over Jack in that not-so-endearing way that Alphas tended to do subconsciously.

He could already tell that this guy was not overly used to dealing with Beta customers.

“Hi, um, I’ve got some glasses to pick up,” he stammered, tripping over his words.

The optician’s face crimpled into vague confusion, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t quite make that out, sir,” he said, leaning over even more awkwardly and angling his ear towards the smaller person.

“I’m here to pick, er, pick up some glasses,” Jack repeated, more loudly this time.

“Ah yes,” he said, satisfied that he had understood the request. “I’m afraid Anita isn’t in today, but I can have a look and check if they’re ready. Do you have your receipt with you?”

“Oh… yes,” Jack said, hurriedly dropping his bag and scouring through it to find the scrap of paper he needed. In a few seconds, he had what he needed, and handed it up to the giant, who inspected it closely.

“And what’s your name, sir?” he asked.

“Crawford… Jack,” the Beta replied, again a little louder than he would have ordinarily. He could feel that he was almost standing on the balls of his feet, an occasional side effect of talking to Alphas was the subliminal need to stand as tall as possible. To be seen, and treated, as equal as was feasible.

The rotund optician headed off through a door into the back of the store for about a minute, before returning with a tiny case grasped almost between his thumb and forefinger.

“Ok, let me see,” he said, crouching down to look at the Beta-size computer at the desk. He managed to operate the keyboard with some difficulty, as it was designed for far smaller fingers, snapped open the tiny case and lifted the glasses out. His hands were shaking slightly as he inspected them, before offering them to Jack to try on.

Jack couldn’t help but notice the dirt in the giant’s fingernails, and the smell of his breath. Evidently he had eaten recently, it smelled like onions, and something sweet, maybe chocolate. It was unappetizing to say the least.

“Can you just check if they fit, sir,” he suggested, washing Jack with his breath once more.

Trying to avoid looking at the man, Jack slid the new pair on; they fit rather well. He looked into the mirrors by the side of the counter, testing to see that the arms were snug to the side of his head, which they were.

“They seem fine,” he said to the Alpha, “They’re not going to slide off, I don’t think.”

“Excellent,” the man replied with well-practiced enthusiasm, “Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

“No thank you, I’m good,” Jack said politely, to which the giant responded with a smarmy smile as he rose to his full height, and walked back to his larger counter.

At least that’s over with, Jack thought to himself. He put the new case safely inside his bag, and once again was struck by how razor-sharp the world had become. After a while his eyes would become used to things being a bit blurry, but the return to clarity was ever-welcome. Throwing the strap over his shoulder and returning his older specs to his face, he turned to head out of the store, the giant optician glancing his way as he walked off. 

That’s when he heard his phone blip.

Taking it out of his pocket, he could see that it wasn’t a text message from his mother. It was a chat message. From Penny.

The hairs on his arms pricked up ever so slightly as he tapped the screen.

P: Can you talk now?

His heart beat a little faster. He paused momentarily before typing out his reply. 

J: Yes

Almost as soon as he’s sent it, the little icon moved down to show that she had seen his reply. In a matter of moments, the screen flashed up with an incoming call.

Call from Penelope Lévesque (friend request pending)

With trembling fingers, he tapped to accept.

“H… Hey,” he said, his voice breaking with nerves.

“Jack, hi…” he heard her say anxiously, her beautiful voice slightly distorted because of the connection. “Before you ask, I am… so sorry for not being there yesterday… I can’t begin to express how sorry I am…”

“It’s ok, it’s ok,” he said, simply overjoyed to hear her voice again, just glad to know she was still there.

“You know I would’ve been there if I could… but, there’s been… something’s happened…” the girl said, her voice tightening up, as if this took effort to talk about.

“Oh…” he said, a pang hitting him in the chest. This sounded serious.

“To cut a long story short… I took ill the other night, couldn’t sleep, I was in… a lot of pain. That morning I could barely move, my parents had to ring the doctor and they rushed me to hospital.”

“Oh god…” Jack said quietly.

“By the time I got there, I was unconscious… they took me straight to A&E, I think they did tests… I don’t think my parents want to tell me what happened exactly but this morning I slowly came round… I was a bit groggy at first… it’s all been a blur…”

Jack was getting upset at the thought of her being in pain or scared. He’d feared something like this might be the case, but he had hoped against hope it would have been something more innocuous.

“They’re keeping me in for observation and I have very little strength at the moment, hopefully all the test results will be in tomorrow and I might get the all-clear if I recover… I do feel a bit better this afternoon…” she added.

There was a short pause

“You still there, Jack?”

“Yeah I’m here Penny… I’m just… I’m so sorry to hear that…”

“But what about you, did you get on ok, I am sooooo sorry I wasn’t there for you… I really am… I don’t know what to do.”

He could hear she was getting upset, and he wanted to rid her of any responsibility. Telling her about what had happened, with Hannah and Alex and Caitlin, would not help one bit - it just wasn’t an option.

“I’m fine, I just missed you… that’s all,” he said, trying to soothe her.

“Aw… I missed you too,” she replied, “I’m just stuck here now, I wish I could see you.”

“Which hospital are you in?” he asked, going to stand over by the wall out of harm’s way.

“I’m in Pinevale General, I think,” she said, half-laughing, “Oh god am I spaced…”

Exactly the same hospital that his Grandad was currently residing in.

Exactly the same.

“Yeah it’s Pinevale General. There’s a lady in the bed over from me, she’s been letting me use her tablet while she sleeps. I think they’ve put me on some really strong painkillers though, I can barely think straight.”

“It’s ok,” Jack soothed, “You’re in safe hands.”

“I know,” she said, “It’s just a bit scary, not knowing what’s wrong…”

“I’m sure it’ll be ok,” he said, “Do you know which ward you’re in?”

“…yeah, Ward F,” she replied, “Wait, you’re not coming to visit are you?”

He paused.

“Jack?!”

 “I don’t know,” he admitted, pacing along the supermarket wall, changing direction and then marching back, running his fingers along the bricks.

“No, you can’t… just stay in school, aren’t you in the library now?” she asked, puzzled.

“Not exactly,” he replied.

“Don’t risk coming to see me, Jack, stay out of sight, don’t take any risks…” she pleaded, her demeanour beginning to shift, “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you. I’d never forgive myself if anything…”

He could hear her starting to hyperventilate.

“It’s ok, I’m safe… I’m not coming, ok?” he interjected, admonishing himself for making her upset.

“Don’t ever risk yourself for me, Jack,” she whispered loudly, as if the tablet was right up next to her face, “Promise me.”

“I… I just want to do something to support you,” he said weakly, “I want you to know I’m here.”

“I know you’re there,” she said softly, “I really do.”

There was a brief pause where neither of them said anything. It was enough for them to just be on the end of the line to one another.

He could hear her breathing gently, still holding the tablet close to her face, and it was strangely comforting. It reminded him of when she was asleep in her room, how much he had wanted to kiss her in that moment…

“I hope you feel better soon,” Jack said finally, “Please don’t worry about me… I need you to concentrate all your energy on getting better.”

“I will,” she said quietly, “Look, I probably have to go, I think Amanda’s waking back up.”

“Ok, take care, Penny,” he said softly.

“Thank you, Jack,” she breathed, and after a couple of seconds, the line went dead with a blip.

How would you rate your call?

He turned the screen off and rested his head on the wall.

He had a decision to make.