He knew he was late, but that couldn't be helped. He only got served this morning. He barely had time to print out his evidence and run through Men's Wearhouse. He didn't like the way he looked and wanted to give their President a piece of his mind. The cuffs of his slacks had come unfolded again and were tripping him. He didn't have time to stop and fold them. The heavy mahogany double doors loomed in front of him, already making him feel infinitesimally small. He gritted his teeth and opened the door.

He didn't expect it to be so crowded. Everybody but the judge was in the room, and they all watched him with scowls on their faces as he made his way to the defense table. The Citizen's Court camera crew was doing sound checks, but they stopped to watch him stumble and try to hike up his pant legs. He couldn't believe it had to be televised. He was somewhat relieved that his mother (God rest her soul) wasn't here to see this. It would've been a terrible way for her to find out about his...activities. Nobody he knew was there, except her.

Of course she came early. He'd never actually seen her before. Thundrgrrrl. They'd IMed each other, PMed each other, and actually talked on Vent, but they'd never traded pictures or video. She looked far better than he did. They didn't have a suit in his size and he had no time or money to get it tailored. He looked like a child in his daddy's work clothes.

She was smaller than he expected. Of course, he didn't expect her to tower over him like in their stories. In most of them, she wasn't tall, but he was tiny. In truth she was tiny, petite, and downright adorable looking. Her black hair was in the cutest pigtails, she was wearing a white blouse, black vest, and long pleated skirt. Even with her shiny black platform shoes, he was sure she barely cleared five feet. Her feet dangled as she sat in the chair and he got a good look at her shoes. If she won, he wondered if that was how she would do it. At least it would be quick. There was no way he could survive being stepped on by one of those. Of course, in the stories, she preferred to do her crushing with her bare feet. She liked to step on her tiny victim's bottom half, then drum on their face and chest with her toes. She said it was more personal that way. Whatever that means.

She was absently nibbling on a pen while staring at a notebook. When he slid back his comically tiny chair (must have been the only one left, though, he couldn’t help but wonder why it wasn’t given to one of the audience members) it squeaked and she finally looked up. Recognizing who he was, she smiled warmly, and frantically pumped her arm in the most energetic and hyper wave he'd ever seen. It was a miracle the thing didn't fall off. When he scowled at her, she looked hurt and went back to writing in the notebook. He could see indentions all over the pen from her teeth. It drew his attention to her mouth and made him shudder. In several of their RPs he'd met his end there. Of course it was thrilling then, but now, her mouth was giving him a cold sweat.

He was still trying to adjust and get comfortable, despite the sweat causing his skin to feel like ants were traversing his entire body (Probably shouldn't have chosen a wool suit) when the film coach approached him. She had mid length blonde hair and a pants suit that really meant business, "You're late," she said sharply, "And you need to do something about," She looked him up and down, "That," She seemed to be pointing to his general presence, "It's not going to endear you to the audience," 

"Sorry. I didn't own a suit and this was such short notice," he said, “Is it common practice to serve someone on the day of the trial?”

"What kind of grown man doesn't own a suit?" She scoffed, completely ignoring his question. He looked down, embarrassed, "At least fix this. Did you even bother to comb your hair, or did you just roll out of whatever passes for a bed at your place and stroll on in?" She sighed heavily, "Here, let me do it," She slid a comb out of her pocket and started roughly combing his hair. He pulled away, "Stay still, you're messing me up," She said sharply. She worked easily, forcing his head where she needed it and quickly giving directions. She fixed his collar and his sloppily knotted tie, "There, I won't say all set, because you are far from that, but it'll have to do,"

"Thanks," He said, still feeling awkward.

"I'm used to it," She said with a smile, "I have kids at home,"

He wished he could just die from embarrassment right there, but no such luck, "Given, the, unprecedented nature of this case, why is it in small claims court? I thought it would be a Supreme Court decision,"

"The nature of this case is breach of contract and failure to render goods. Nothing special. The value of the item that was withheld does not exceed the maximum for small claims," She said as if this should be obvious to the most casual observer.

"How can that be? The ITEM is a human life! Mine!" He said.

"Don't raise your voice. You're indoors," The coach said, "Once you sign the papers and become a Chum, you won't be a human,"

"You can't make me do that. It wouldn't be right! This is insane!" He said.

"Watch your language! You better be on your best behavior. See that bailiff over there? She's new. The old one was fired last week because he sneezed during filming. He was also held in contempt and fined two hundred dollars. If you've watched 'The Citizen's Court' before, you know the judge has a certain... reputation. That is not an act," The coach whispered all of this. All he could do was gulp. Seeing that there was nothing more she could do for him, and seemingly writing him off as a lost cause, the coach made her way to the tiny plaintiff.

They chatted pleasantly for a while, but he wasn't paying attention to what they were saying. He was too busy watching Thundergrrrl's feet dangle and kick through the air casually as she smiled and tilted her head to the side. She was his age, but her tiny frame made her look much younger, especially with the way she dressed. It was probably an act to win over the crowd. He clutched his mountain of evidence to him tightly, accidentally giving himself paper cuts all over his hand, but that didn't matter. This was his lifeline. Once he read this to them, there would be no doubt who the winner would be.

The two women had finished talking, and the coach had gone to take her seat. His former playmate turned plaintiff skipped merrily over to him, thick soles clomping on the tile floor. She saw that his eyes were drawn to her shoes.

"You like? I just got them for today," she giggled, "I wanted to look taller on TV, but it looks like we'll be sitting down anyways," She lifted her right foot, "I've already messed them up though. I stepped on a cricket on the way in. I didn't notice him until I heard the crunch," Segmented serrated legs were still stuck in the light tread of the shoes. She must have polished them hard that morning because the tops were so shiny, he could see himself in them. That, coupled with the bug, was enough to tie his stomach in knots. He quickly looked away from the shoes, trying hard to ignore the part of him that was excited by them, "They're everywhere out there, and they're like, suicidal or something,"

"Uh, huh," He said, trying to be polite.

"Why did you delete your account on giantessworld, and your messenger, and your Vent account without saying anything?" He'd never seen a sadder face than the one she had right there. Even he felt mad at himself right now.

"Uh, I lost interest," he said, "That stuff just doesn't do it for me anymore,"

"That's strange. It almost felt like you were trying to get away from me,"

"No, nonono," he said in what he hoped was a convincing tone.

"Well, we're about to make it all better," She said, suddenly brightening. It was like her moods were attached to a light switch, "And guess what else," She smiled extra hard and leaned into his face. In his seated position it wasn't nearly as much of a feat as if he'd been standing. When he didn't respond soon enough she said, "I just got my braces off! Go on, look. Why aren't you looking, I know you want to,"



"I looked," He said, as he tried his hardest not to. Truth be told, he still hadn't lost interest in that stuff and was afraid he'd like looking at her mouth and his arousal would prove that he lied to her earlier. That morning, a few months ago, when he woke up and saw the news, he had freaked out. It wasn't a game anymore. Entrepreneur, Joe Newhope had been shrinking prisoners. He knew it was only a matter of time before such technology would be available to the general public. He'd quickly cancelled all of his accounts and considered that the end of it. They didn't know each other's names and wouldn't know each other on the street. She must have gotten up earlier than him though because he had an excitedly written and error filled email from her in his inbox. He deleted that too.

"You're not looking," She said in a teasing singsong voice, "It's ok if you're nervous. I am too. You know, I've been waiting for this forever," she whispered in his ear. She was awash with excitement and seemed oblivious to his fear stricken state.

The bailiff looked at her watch and stepped forward. Her long black hair was tightly braided into several small thin braids that were tied behind her head in a single ponytail to keep it out of her way while she worked. She was easily the tallest person in the room, "Alright people. We will be on the air in five minutes. Everybody take your seats and we will go over the rules one more time for those who came in late," She glared at him when she said this. She sounded like she was from the Virgin Islands. Her posture, fitness, and strait gig line told of possible military service. She was beautiful, but looked like she could break him in half if she wanted to.

"I guess I should go back to my seat. You look good, Pinty. Dressing like you're already shrinking almost makes up for hiding from me," Thundrgrrrl said. She patted him on the back and made her way back to her seat. She pulled herself up and sat down, staring intently at the bailiff. If he didn't already know the kinds of things she was into, he would feel very good about this, but she had told him long ago that if she had the opportunity, she'd be unable to resist. Sure, she may feel guilty about it later, but in the moment…Pinty. A shortened version of his screen name. Her little pet name for him. Should he just call her Thunder then? He still didn't know her real name, but she probably knew his considering the fact that he was served papers at his house.

"There will be no cell phones, there will be no talking unless the judge gives you permission to speak, there will be no writing," At this statement, from the baliff, Thundrgrrrl slid her notebook to the side., “There will be no eating, drinking, smoking, or anything of the sort,”

He liked listening to the bailiff's voice, even more; he loved watching her white teeth flash as she spoke. For him, listening to her was more like listening to music than instructions, so after a while, her words were tuned out. His eyes began to wander. A cricket had entered the courtroom and was crawling around near her foot. She didn't notice it. They said the Chums were around an inch or two tall. That was about the size of the insect that was near the bailiff's shoe. It wouldn't take any effort on her part to destroy it. She would merely have to lift her foot, move it an inch to the right, and set it down. That would be it for the little critter or anything that size. He shuddered and averted his eyes. 

They landed on Thunder. She was paying close attention to what the Bailiff was saying and wasn't looking at him. She reached into her pocket without looking, opened a pack of Tic-Tacs, and slid one out. Still watching the bailiff, she placed it on her tongue and drew it in, then placed her hand under her chin, resting her elbow on the table. She looked way more composed than he was. His insides were worms right now, but she could just as easily be at home watching this on tv. He could hear the crunch from his table as she got bored with the mint and chewed it up. He shuddered again and tried his hardest to stop thinking about how badly he needed to win this case. It was a done deal, right? There's no way they'd let her take him if they knew she was going to murder him, right? He tried to pay attention to what was said, but just as he’d regain his train of thought, Thunder would eat another Tic-Tac and further fray his nerves. Why didn’t anybody say anything to her?

"When the judge enters, I will say all rise. This means everybody. If you show disrespect by remaining in your seat, you will be charged with contempt of court. You will be sworn in, and then only AFTER the judge allows it may you be seated," The bailiff continued. He lost his train of thought again. He was never one for lectures or anything that required extended sitting and listening without something to do with his hands. Despite his fear, he became drowsy. The theme song started and the judge exited her chambers.

"All rise, the Honorable Judge Julie Breakman presiding," The bailiff said swiveling to the right to stand at attention. Her foot came down on the cricket, but if she noticed, she showed no sign. "Pinty", startled out of his daze and shot up, but his legs were asleep from the odd angle he'd been sitting in. He couldn't feel them at all and tripped back over his chair. He smiled sheepishly and tried to get up quickly. He was now standing on the cuffs of his pants; his chair was on its side on the floor.

"Honorable" Julie Breakman was now glaring down at him from the judge's bench. On TV, the camera would film her in a way that made her look like she was on equal footing with the rest of the court, but due to the stage and the podium she towered over the courtroom. She was a severe looking woman in the neighborhood of fifty. Her hair was in a red pixie cut (In the US, judges don't wear the white wigs anymore) Her horned rimmed glasses added to her appearance of severity, and her black robe enhanced her vertical emphasis. He'd always thought she was kind of hot for an old ball buster, but he had a feeling she wouldn't be flattered if he told her so.

"What's so funny?" She asked, her death gaze still trained hard on him, "Is this a joke to you?"

"No, ma'am, um, I mean, Your Honor," He said trying to look as solemn and respectful as he possibly could. He had an odd habit of smiling when he was nervous. It got him in trouble with authority figures all the time.

"I'm feeling sort of generous today," She said, "I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to chalk what just happened up to nerves and let it slide, but if you cause one more outburst I will charge you with two counts of contempt. Don't make me regret my mercy,"

"Yes, Your Honor. Thank you, Your Honor," He said.

Judge Breakman picked up a couple of sheets of paper from the podium, "Be seated,” Pinty carefully stood his chair up and sat down, making sure not to put one of the chair legs on the cuffs of his pants.  “Ok, let's see. In order to protect the privacy of the innocent party in this matter, she looked at the plaintiff when she said this and a vague smile twitched at the corners of her mouth, both parties will be addressed by their screen names during these proceedings,"

They were sworn in, and then the judge read the charges. Every now and then, when there was nothing else on, and he was bored, he would watch this show on TV. Judge Julie Breakman had always been hard and in control, but, watching closely, he got the impression that she had a slight tremble, as if she was nervous. As a professional, she seemed to be composing herself, but something was really getting to her.

"Ok, the charges are as follows. The plaintiff, one Ms. Thundergrrrl," She coughed a little and her voice wavered when she spoke the name, "alleges that she entered into a contract two years ago with the defendant, one P1nts1z3 1337," She rolled her eyes, " The contract is worded as follows, ‘I, P1nts1z3 1337, being of sound mind, do hereby swear, that if shrinking technology is ever developed, I will allow myself to be shrunk and give myself as a gift to one Thundergrrrl to do with as she desires,’” She looked up at Pinty, "You really agreed to this?"

"Yes, Your Honour, but I," She held up her hand before he could finish.

"That'll do. You'll get your chance to plead your case after we hear from the plaintiff," She turned to Thundergrrrl, "So, did the defendant ever rescind the contract or make any attempt to have it annulled?"

"No, Your Honor," Thundergrrrl said, "He just vanished. He cancelled all of the forms of contact we had the day the news broke. I was devastated," She teared up, "It may seem silly, considering we never met in person, but given the nature of our relationship, I considered him much like I would consider a boyfriend. When he left without a trace, it felt like being dumped and not knowing it until you come home and find your boyfriend's stuff moved out," She openly cried. Pinty could feel every eye in the room on him. He had never considered their arrangement that way. It was just something fun to do after a long day. He had dated regularly during their games. Did she really feel this way? He knew everybody in the room was glaring at him, but the worst part was the personal shame he felt.

"And why did you do this?" Judge Julie asked him.

"It wasn't supposed to be real. It was a fantasy, j-just pretend. I don't want to die. If I go through with it that is guaranteed," He blurted.

"I really don't see how that's a big loss," Judge Julie said, "So, you signed this contract with no intention to follow through?" 

"I, um, that is," He said.

"I, um, that is," Judge Julie mimicked.

"I thought I wanted to, but I also didn't think I'd have to," he trailed off.

"That is just sick. Of all the deplorable things a person could do," She said angrily.

"It was online! We didn't even really know each other. We still don't," he spat. She leaned over the podium, staring daggers at him. He wondered if he should've chosen his words more carefully. He felt very small.

"It was online? That's your excuse. Not only did you have no intention of following through, but you actually thought you could vanish without fulfilling your end of the contract and this poor woman would have no recourse?" She gestured toward Thundergrrrl, who was still crying.

"That's not what I, that is, um, I mean, It's not like it was a real contract," He really wasn't sure what to say.

"That is where you're wrong, little man," Judge Julie said, she straightened out her papers, then looked at Thundergrrrl, "Are you ready to call your first witness?"

"Yes, Your Honour," Thundergrrrl sniffed.

"Witness?" Pinty gulped. Nobody said anything about witnesses.

"My," sniff, "First witness is Jane Stampit, the notary public that witnessed the electronic signature,"

"What?" Pinty shouted, “You never said anything about that!”

"Don't speak out of turn!" Judge Julie said. Jane Stampit stood up and walked over to Thundergrrrl's table, "Alright, Mrz. Stampit, give us your testimony whenever you're ready,"

"Thank you, Your Honor," Mrz. Stampit said. She had brown hair and a gray skirt suit. She looked to be in her early thirties, "I met, um, Ms. Thundergrrrl the day before the signing. She wanted to know how the process of e-signatures worked. I explained that I had to be present with at least one of the signers and able to confirm the identity of the other. She provided me with his information, you know, name, address, confirmed his IP address,"

"That is private information. What right do you-" Pinty started before the judge cut him off.

"I've tried to be patient with you, but you refuse to be quiet while the women are talking. I guess it was a mistake to be gracious with you earlier. I charge you with two counts of contempt of court!" Judge Julie banged her gavel down. Pinty hung his head and clenched his fists in rage. Fortunately, they weren't visible because of his sleves or he may have been charged with a terroristic threat. How did she get his information? "Go on Mrz. Stampit,"

"I was present for the signing and notarized a printed copy.  The defendant seemed pretty eager to sign at the time. The things he said should not be repeated in a courtroom. Ms. Thundergrrrl got a copy of the printed contract and I filed another for public record," Mrz. Stampit said. Pinty wanted to object, but knew what would happen, so he quietly turned red.

"Ms. Thundergrrrl, do you have any more witnesses?"

"No, Your Honor," Thundergrrrl said.

"That should do. Mrz. Stampit, you may be seated," Judge Julie said.

"Thank you, Your honor," Mrz. Stampit said and went back to her seat.

"So, we have his confession, Ms. Thundergrrrl's testimony, and a Notary's official stamp. While the evidence is overwhelming, I am required by law to allow you to plead your case. Go ahead, P1nt S1z3 1337, thrill me," Judge Julie said. Pinty's mouth went dry. He didn't know what to do. Nobody told him he could bring witnesses. Nobody he knew in person knew about his hobby. He hastily grabbed his stack of papers, accidentally spilling some of them. He apologized and set what he had in order.

"T-thank you, Your Honor. I have with me a log of our Role-plays and a few of her stories to demonstrate why I felt the need to cancel my account," He picked up the first page. It was a few pages into the RP because the top sheets were on the floor, "Thundrgrrrl: I pin you under my foot to stop you from running, then, as you beg for me to spare you, I lift you to my moist lips,"

The gavel slammed hard three times, "I'll have you know this is a court of law! If you read one more word of that, of that filth, I will give you a third charge of contempt of court," Judge Julie's face was almost as red as her hair. Her voice actually cracked with rage. Thundrgrrrl looked embarrassed and after a few shocked seconds, began to openly weep again.

"But, Your Honor, these document are-" He started.

"Completely irrelevant," Judge Julie said.

"How do you figure that?" He asked.

"They have nothing to do with the case at hand. The purpose of this case is to determine if you breached a contract and stole property from the plaintiff. It has nothing to do with, those stories (which are a private matter by the way) what kind of animal would air something given to him in confidence on television?" In all the times he'd actually watched her show, Pinty had never seen Judge Julie this angry, "Let's get on with the case. Do you have any witnesses to call?" He shook his head, too scared to speak, "I thought not. From where I stand, matters are plainly clear. P1nts1z3 1337, you are hereby charged with breach of contract, and unlawful withholding of property. On my order, you are to pay the court costs for both parties, pay your contempt fines, and be escorted to the Minutia INC. home office by my bailiff and an armed officer, where you will sign yourself over to Ms. Thundrgrrrl and be shrunk to a more fitting size for your worth. That is all. Decision in favor of the plaintiff, dismissed," She banged the gavel down again and the main camera stopped rolling. People surrounded Thundrgrrrl's table and congratulated her as she shook hands and smiled. You would never know she was crying seconds ago.

A cameraman and a man in a tan suit approached Pinty, "Mr. P1nts1z3, how do you feel about today's proceedings? Do you feel like justice has been done?"

Pinty grabbed the man's lapels and screamed, "You have to listen to me! I don't want to die. Please, do something!" The bailiff had to grab him and pull him away. The cameraman and the guy in the suit then went to Thundrgrrrl.

"How do you feel about today's proceedings? Do you feel like justice has been done?"

"Oh yes! Definitely! All I wanted was to fulfill his dream and now I get the chance!" She looked exuberant. While the bailiff held Pinty in place, Thundrgrrl approached the bench.

"Can I have your autograph," Both women asked at once, then laughed. They both signed papers and traded them. Pinty was able to read the paper in Thundrgrrrl's hand.



"Let me know how it is,"

-Hammert0ez



Why did that name sound familiar? As the bailiff carted him out the mahogany doors, recognition clicked and he turned back just in time to see the judge silently mouth the words, "I love your stories," to Thundrgrrrl, while waving with a schoolgirl grin across her face.