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A turbid shard of luminosity leaked though the inch long breach in the retractable canopy, piercing the besieging lightlessness of the purse's inner dwellings. The tranquil oscillations of his darkened recesses did little to calm the antsy little man. His bare bottom rasped uncomfortably against the leathery concave floor as he leaned his back on a standing cylindrical mast of lipstick, the rounded side of its cold metal casing running even with the flow of his vertebrae. The balmy air and smell of murky lavender weighed heavily on his eye lids. Subconsciously, his upper incisors raked across the top of his tongue. Justin's mind continued to wander in the blackness, much as it had for the last twenty minutes.

Gosh damned latte! I should be at work right now, getting shot down by Vicki again, or getting ripped into by bossman for running my machine too slow. But no, here I am, sitting inside the purse of a total stranger. INSIDE a purse, for Christ's sake! My tongue feels like it just used a blackboard eraser as an ice cream cone. And to top it all off, I'm tired as hell, but I can't even doze off because of this damned caffeine buzz. Stupid, stupid latte!


The rhythmic swaying of Justin's world came to an abrupt stop. Gravity pulled at him lightly, causing his weight to sink into the flimsy ground. Then, his stomach seemed to fly into his throat, and his meager substance was yanked in the opposite direction. The slumped canvas beneath him flattened gradually, its base hardening all the while. A roaring zip signaled the opening of the once aphotic sky, rattling Justin to his core.

Blinding white bombarded Justin's eyes from aloft with extreme ferocity. He shielded them from the bright onslaught with interlocking forearms. A pair of easeful conjoined serpents, the lower one slightly longer, slithered across his exposed chest. A thick trunk of tissue and muscle brushed gently against his shoulder blades. Slight pressure surrounded his body, and he involuntarily ascended from the feminine cave.

As his feet lightly touched down onto smooth wooden land, Justin's sight began to return to him. The encumbrance of mild force which had enveloped him just seconds prior released itself from his upper body, uncomfortably cooling the heated spots where the massive digits responsible had been clamped. A blur of light pink, with five same colored streaks trailing behind it, quickly withdrew from his position, and set itself down several feet in front of him. Justin wiped his eyes with his fists, and refocused himself.

"Where am I?"

"You're home." A bubbly thunder announced from on high. "More accurately, you're in the kitchen."

Justin stared in awe at the vertical landscape of toned epidermal glory that stood before him as his view became less clouded. Following the nearly giddy voice which was apparently charged with fielding his questions, he tilted his gaze upward. A wide halo of fuchsia cut the strong abdominal wall short, leading into the atramentous waters of cotton fabric. Two great waves, their amplitudes only a little shorter than Justin, stood frozen in time beside each other amidst the higher seas, their perky crests in proper wavelength with one another. The underside of an adorably annular chin was next to catch his attention. Finally, in the distant skies, he found that the radiant features of Arrie's pleasant expression reciprocated his interest.

"I hope the ride wasn't too rough. I was extra careful, you know."

Instinctively, Justin took a step backward, away from the intimidating size of Arrie. His heart jumped as his lower back ruffled a solid net of plastic behind him. Spinning around impetuously, he came chest to crust with a seemingly endless row of brown dividers encased in a clear bag. Justin backed away again, taking in the monstrous loaf.

Shit, I could tunnel through this thing. Justin theorized. Maybe.

Justin's concentration shifted to the rest of his environs. Far off to his right, beige curtains glowed as they sheltered the room from the outside world. Beneath them, a silver faucet glistened with the scintilla of light to break into the room as it loomed mightily over a deep argent canyon. Overhead, a series of cabinets the size of two-story buildings clung to the white wall, threatening to topple onto him at any moment. To his right, a vast, barren plane of oak stretched for an eternity, separating Justin from a square black monolith over twice his own height. He turned to face Arrie, a look of pure fright writ upon his face.

"W-what did you do to me?" Justin quavered.

Arrie frowned at the accusing query. "Me? What makes you think I had anything to do with this?"

"You tried to step on me." Justin blurted out.

Arrie crossed her arms just below her chest. Her succulent lower lip pinned its counterpart firmly as she rolled her eyes at her diminutive prosecutor.

"Yeah, and I would have succeeded, too, if it hadn't been for your brilliant huddle into a ball and wait strategy." Arrie's tone was heavy with sarcasm. "Besides, you tried to step on me first."

"What?" Justin paused. "But I thought you told me not to worry about that."

"So don't." Arrie replied matter-of-factly. "What you should be worrying about is clothes."

"Clothes?"

"Well, I guess I don't mind you going au naturel, if you insist." As she spoke, Arrie's right hand stealthily crept behind the overwhelmed little man. She brought the tips of her thumb and index finger together, pinching the taut right cheek of his tiny buttocks. Justin gave a startled yelp in response.

Suddenly aware of his nudity, both of Justin's hands lunged for his crotch. "No! Uh, I mean, do you think you could help me find something to wear, Arrie?"

"I'll see what I can do, Mr. Modesty."

"Thanks." Justin sighed in relief. The gentle hum emitted by the refrigerator on the other side of the room began to repose his excited brain. In this newly relaxed state, another thought came to him. "Well, if you didn't do this to me, then why did you take me here?"

"You know, you ask a lot of questions." Arrie stated. "No more."

"Huh?"

Arrie set her mammoth arms onto the counter top, her hands folded atop of one another, directly before Justin. Her upper half leaned down in accompaniment, avalanching her gargantuan beauty toward him at an accelerated rate. Her chin rested gracefully on exposed knuckles, putting her vibrant verdigris oculars, their gleam emphasized by the lenses of her thin spectacles, just above level with his head. Swarthy filaments piled by the thousands on either side of her gargantuan face, their ends scattering madly in all directions. A devilish smile crossed her lips.

"I think I'll be the only one asking questions from now on."

"But how am I going to..."

Justin's words were stopped as a prodigious finger pressed itself tenderly into his face, effectively covering his eyes, nose, and mouth.

"No. More. Questions." Arrie weakly tapped her pliable appendage into Justin's confused visage with each playful word. The last dab, however, carried enough power to knock him on his posterior, inciting a giggle from Arrie.

"Fine." Justin agreed in annoyance. He pulled himself to his feet, eager to change the subject. "Nice place, by the way."

"Why, thank you." Arrie was cordial in her response. "Is there anything I can get you?"

"Could you get me some water, please?" Justin requested. "I got this horrible taste in my mouth, and I can't get it out."

Justin was quickly snatched up in Arrie's scooping palm. She straightened her back, carrying him parallel with her scowling countenance as it rose. Her eyes scrutinized him as he sat stunned in the center of her hand.

"Didn't we just agree that you wouldn't be asking any more questions?" Arrie interrogated seriously. "Now, what should I do to make sure you get the message this time?"

Justin's world spun as the living platform underneath him tilted away from Arrie. He rolled clumsily onto her bridged fingers, which parted upon his arrival. His torso laid on the central phalange of her middle finger, his legs and arms hanging over its sides. A log of flesh crashed softly into the small of his back, and he soon found himself flipping over. Now on his spine, two tentacles held him in place, a long one on his chest and a burly one on his thighs. Arrie's stout thumb maneuvered under his legs and flicked up. Justin was sent barreling back to his starting position. He felt another collision to his back, this one from the other side, and swiftly rotated in the opposite direction.

Arrie twirled Justin between her fingers for a good while, exercising incredible dexterity. The index finger on her free hand pressed against her lips as she feigned contemplation. She experimented with her pacing, alternating high and low speeds without pattern. She twisted her wrist back and forth as she toyed with him, serving to further disorient Justin. Occasionally, she brought the occupied digits closer to her face, studying his expression. It was always filled with alarm, but never anguish. She would then send the extremity back to its rightful place, a smug mien overtaking her facial features every time.

Finally, Arrie halted Justin's rotisserie. "So, have you thought about what I should do to you?"

"Isn't this-" Justin stopped in mid-sentence. "This is enough, I think."

"Well, it sounds like you've figured things out." Arrie determined. She set him back onto the counter. "I won't go so easy on you next time, though."

Justin grimaced at this proclamation.

"So what was it you wanted again?" Arrie asked kindly.

"I could really use some water."

"Coming right up!"

Arrie walked across the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. She reached in and pulled out a bottled water. As she returned to Justin, Arrie unscrewed the cap and poured it full of water. He accepted the great bowl graciously with both hands as she handed it to him. She set the bottle down beside him, and he glowered as he noticed it was a few inches taller than him. He raised the cap to his lips, and chugged its contents as excess water spilled over him.

"Bleck!" Justin exclaimed. "That just made it worse."

"What did you eat?" Arrie questioned.

"Nothing. All I had this morning was that sour latte."

"Sour latte?" Arrie wondered aloud. "Is that what made you rush to the bathroom so fast?"

"I didn't rush," Justin corrected, "and I don't know."

"That clerk seemed pretty pissed at you." Arrie continued. "Do you think she put something in your drink?"

"I can't think of anything that tastes like-" a proverbial ton of bricks struck Justin before he could finish. "You don't think she put something in my latte that did this to me, do you?"

Arrie nodded and moved her lips to speak. However, the emergence of an impish grin blocked any words from exiting her mouth. Justin looked at her, befuddled, for a minute before he realized his mistake.

"Shit!"

Justin darted for the open expanse opposite the sink, Arrie's right hand giving him chase.
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