Jason woke up dizzy and disorientated. That had been the kegger party from hell. He could see Wes, Steve, and Don sprawled on the ground nest to him. But as they could see something was wrong. There was an endless plain of hardwood spreading before them, flanked by eight giant white doors , and a massive house door stretching of hundreds feet up to an arch with Greek letters on it. Gamma, Gamma, Gamma, they read.
“But those are the sorority house letters,” Jason Said in confusion.
Suddenly, as the four men got to their feet, thunderous footsteps shook the floor. They recoiled in shock as Katrina, the leader of the sorority loomed over them, a giantess. The men were maybe half an inch tall next to her. Blonde, barefoot, and dressed in a pink t-shirt and panties, she shouted with all the force of her hurricane namesake.
“HERE AT TRI-GAMMA HOUSE, WE HAVE AN ANNUAL TRADITION,” Katrina’s voice boomed, “IT’S CALLED “GAUNTLET.” WE SHRINK FOUR FRAT BOYS, SET ‘EM HERE BY MY TOE, AND SEE IF THEY CAN MAKE THE FRONT DOOR WITHOUT GETTING SQUISHED BY ONE OF THE EIGHT GIRLS IN THE HALL.” As Katrina said it, eight other giant girls opened the white doors, bare feet and evil grins all around. “THEY CAN”T STEP PAST THE DOORFRAMES,” Katrina finished, “SIDEWAYS. BUT AS FAR FORWARD AS THEY LIKE. GOT THAT? THEN ONE...TWO...THREE...
Jason lead the charge. Don and Wes followed, running like this was the last track meet of their lives. But Steve stayed put.
“Wait, guys” he yelled, “this can’t be real this is just a bad trip or something!”
But by the time his words reached them, Jason and crew were at the second door, and Steve was squished between Katrina’ toes as she sighed with satisfaction.
“HEADS UP, GIRLS!” her voice boomed, “THE’RE ALMOST HALFWAY OUT!”
Jason’s world turned into an asteroid storm of bare feet stomping the floor with gleeful precision.
“Duck left!” Jason shouted like an army marshal as a giant set of pink toenails blocked their right. “Weave like you’ve got the ball in a qualifier!”
But at the third door, a brunette brought her bare foot down on Wes and squished him with a sick laugh.
“TWO DOWN,” she yelled.
Jason and Don ran with a terror like they had never felt before, constantly dodging an avalanche of toes and heels. At the sixth door, a redhead stomped on Don with such force that Jason fell flat on his face.
“NO!” Jason yelled as her foot missed him by inches.
Jason darted to door eight. The two giantesses stepped in to the hall and formed a double arch with their legs touching in the middle. Jason knew there was only one way past. He charged the middle. The giantess on his left raised her foot to squish him. With a burst of speed, Jason jumped under her foot and past it on the other side, rolling to his feet past the doorframe, their bounds line.
“KATRINA!” the last giantess yelled to her.
“CLEAR A PATH, HERE I COME!” Katrina yelled as she charged down the hall, each step an earthquake to Jason.
With the last of his strength, Jason ran to close the gap with the exit. He saw the hole at the base of the door he had to fit through. Katrina was less than two feet from him now, and Jason leapt into the hole, avoiding Katrina’s big toe by less than an inch.
Out on the front porch, Jason was greeted by a giantess, another brunette with bare feet and jeans on a black tank top.
“KUDOS,” she thundered. “YOU’RE THE FIRST GUY TO MAKE IT SINCE REAGAN WAS IN OFFICE. I’M VERY HAPPY.”
“Because I won?” Jason gasped for breath.
“NO,” she answered as she raised her dirty right foot, “BECAUSE I NEVER GET TO SQUISH ONE.”
“But-but I made it out,” Jason stammered.
“WE NEVER SAID YOU GOT TO GO FREE IF YOU DID,” she continued, “WE JUST SAID THAT THE GIRLS IN HALL WOULDN’T SQUISH YOU. YOU’RE OUT OF BOUNDS NOW, BUG-MAN.”
Jason didn’t have the breath left to scream as the giantess squished him underfoot, twisting and savoring the moment.
“POOR LITTLE JOCK,” she sighed “WELL, I HAD TO MAKE MY PLEDGE SOMEHOW. AT LEAST YOU’LL STILL MAKE MY YEARBOOK AFTER ALL,” she said with a smile as she saw the squished speck on the sole of her foot.