"Beeeer." Yukari's voice reached that careful halfway between a joyful cheer and an exhausted moan. Her bare arms stretched behind her dark hair. Even on the tabletop, you had to step away twice to fully see the titanic fist stretched into the air. Her hefty chest raised slightly in a great breath, and fell in a long sigh.

You stumbled over your words. Did your teacher, who'd promised care of you, just suggest drinking?

She squinted, hands on her hips. After vying so long for her attention, it was jarring to see the huge brown pools directly pointing at you. "You know, I can see that cheeky look down there. If you touch my booze, I'll flick you out the window. For you, kid - strictly dealcoholized wine! Even kindergarten brats can't get a buzz from this stuff." Her finger pointed in warning as she backed towards her fridge, crushing a paper marked "Mihama Chiyo - 100". Those looming eyes never left as she took out a bottle and a can, having memorized their spot.

Yukari slammed both immense pillars on either end of you. With two loud *snap*s, she opened them both at once. Her distant pupils briefly escaped to the window. "I've been trying to get fridge room since New Years, so you better drink up."

Was this really an offer? With her tone, and the wine's intimidating volume, it came across as an order. This wasn't right; she couldn't look after you drunk. Maybe you should say something.

"Now, a glass..." She rummaged in the drawer below you. The rapid, chaotic movement wobbled through your soles on the tabletop. With no luck, Yukari's titanic torso leaned in closer to reach a cabinet. Her mountainous chest slammed on her counter. You backed up - but the twin shadows had already ensnared you, their sources coming a split second after. The soft, clothed surface choked you of the already-thin air, fibres drilling into your chest and smothering your face. While it'd never register to the distracted teacher, the fall of her tits shook everything ferociously.

A few quick nudges brought those ponds of eyes downwards, eyebrows furrowed. She shut them and smiled weakly, rubbing her brown hair. "Ahah, whoops!" Your temporary guardian - for given value of "guarding", and you HOPED it was VERY temporary - went on tiptoes, lifting the crushing pressure off you. With every ounce of your might, you pushed yourself out from under the tits. Despite her soft look of pity, the vibrations in her massive bust told you she was stifling giggles. "I was thinking about Nyamo. Last week, she told me I shouldn't be drinking alone. Or was that 'unsupervised'? Well, congratulations: I declare you my supervisor! Oh, here's one."

A sputter of the wine dripped into a thimble between Yukari's fingers. The container landed near you, wobbling liquid letting off a faint aroma. Using both arms, you lifted the makeshift cup – or bucket. It wasn't until now that you realized it, but you WERE thirsty. And The Dreaded Yukarimobile left you with plenty of brain cells you wanted to kill. You tapped the thimble it against the large can, offering her your most earnest "kanpai!". You gazed at your weary face's reflection in the drink, before dunking it in. Coolness rushed through your cheeks and forehead.

"Yeah, that's the spirit!" She smiled, and instantly got to chugging her own beer.

Your beverage had no strong taste. But after so much time warmed by your teacher's body heat, it was amazingly refreshing. You dove in for a second mouthful, letting the clear water drip over your chin. And a third, splashing the wine against your face. Your shoulder muscles relaxed as drops flew on them.

Your legs lost balance, wobbling. Was the temperature change dizzying you, or the stuffy apartment air? No - your drinking partner had slammed her can to the table, crushing it. Her titanic teeth shut in a cringe, sputtering - before she shouted, strong-smelling spittle flying upon you. "KkhhhyyAAAH~! Life is good!"

That vast sea of alcohol - she simply knocked it back? How vast was this woman's stomach, and how mighty was her liver? What might have once been fear-inspiring now only made you laugh. And keep laughing. Finally, no more enduring crushing pain. No more shouting for attention. You could spare a moment to relax.

"So, I wanna know: what's going on with the girls? They're too quiet." She asked while grabbing another can. Once you spoke up, she leaned in, her breath ruffling your wet hair. "Louder! Nyamo won't share gossip, and Kimura won't talk about anyone but his 'darling little Kaorin'. Is there something they're hiding?" She gasped. "Did class 1-5 nab a transfer student? Are they gonna beat us next sports fair?"

The eagerness moved you to answer. You shared every bit of news that crossed your mind, stealing small sips whenever Yukari responded. She took long gulps; you practically heard floods crashing within her gullet. A few times, Yomi's warning flashed through your head; but while the rumours you might've made Nyamo scold you, the sprawled-out titan kept asking for dirt. How could you say no?

"Hah, you're kidding! Sakaki and Kaori, you think? Things've changed since my time, you know. Wait, did I say 'my time'? Eeeh, I'm not that old, am I?" Yukari's cheeks went red, as she sipped again. "*hic* But still, all my friends keep marrying. Why rush it?" She lifted a finger up, as if she was teaching an English lesson - only wobblier. Or was your diminished perspective throwing you off? "Don't rush into things! That leads to things breaking! Remember that time Tomo rushed into that wall, and broke her arm?"

Tomo... Maybe Tomo had a point. "Yukes" was trustworthy.

When you dove into the thimble for another sip, you found it empty. What? You had so much a second ago! Or... ten seconds ago? Couldn't have been THAT long. The wall clock's fingers were distant, inconstant blurs. But if it were really late, you'd be craving dinner.

All you felt was thirst. Somehow, you needed more of that sake. Your instructor had given you a mission, to drink; who were you to deny it?

You turned to the vast bottle beside you. Thin perspiration dripped down its mass. Traces of the teacher's fingerprints spread before your eyes. The label read "TOSO – Low Alcohol Rice Sake".

Odd. She said it had NO alcohol. Oh well. Even kids couldn't get drunk off that, right? Your smaller body mass probably wouldn't change anything. That buzzing in your head was probably a fan or something.

You called to your teacher for help - to find her chin pointed up, downing a new alcoholic ocean. It'd take no effort for her to tilt this great tower. You tried to ask again.

"Ah, tasty! See, you, you... Whatever your name is... Enjoy your youth! If you grow up too fast, you'll – you won't grow up!"

You called up: "Miss Yukari..."

"Education!" She shouted. Her current can hit the tabletop, compressed by her unbelievable drunken strength. "I call for a revolution in Japan's education system! Our children can't be ignored! Let us hear their voices!"

You shouted, tapping on the can: "Yukari!"

"Don't interrupt me!" She flicked you, the gigantic finger's impact sending you to the ground. Her skyscraper-rivalling limbs wobbled haphazardly, lazily flopping around - and amazing you with their speed and swiftness. Your attempts to prop yourself up were difficult with intoxicated screams above, booming into your bones. "This is important! This is your life!"

Her breath reeked of booze. Merely inhaling it made you feel lighter-headed... But stronger. Bolder. You could wrestle this bottle over, and take the liquid from it in your thimble. Eyeing it, your teacher's words echoing in your head, you accepted the challenge.

Ear-splitting rumbles kept ringing out beside you: "Seize it in your hands! You can do it!... Oh, God..." Her mouth fluctuated between a too-wide smile and a pained, sickened frown. Her whole torso swayed as if it were gelatin.

You held the minuscule scratches, only barely squeezing your fingers inside one, and pushed. With a shout, you crawled up, thinking it'd give you better leverage. Gasoline burned through your veins. You pushed as hard as possible, ramming your shoulder into it.

A tiny nudge. A wobble. It was a huge drop below, but your desire for beer overrode your fear. You moved your weight, doing your best to tip the tower... As Yukari, groaning, collapsed onto the table. The whole structure leaned back, and went into free fall.

The wind in your hair was exhilarating... until it was terrifying. The container's falling speed built up, and sake spilled from the mouth, streaming down your limbs. You couldn't hold on, and landed directly in Yukari's thigh. It was soft, fleshy, and Thankfully, the glass itself didn't drop; but the precious, refreshing contents from it leaked in a waterfall, landing atop you, and spreading in rivers across your gigantic teacher's bare skin.

Her neck snapped up, as if woken from a trance. "Wh-wha? *hic* That's – that's cold!" She rested, lifting a leg up – and rolling you closer to her stomach. Her eyes were still shut in pain, and wobbled, as if simply speaking hurt her. "You jeeerk... I'm *hic* not gonna clean that up! Take responsibility!"

That same rush blared in your head, casting a murky, alcoholic fog. Without thinking, you planted your face in Yukari's wet lap and licked. The salt of her expansive skin mixed with the wine, making you crave more to wash it down. Your tongue rushed against the moist, spongy surface. For a straight minute, you kept slurping, sucking, burying your face into the soft cushion.

She grasped the bottle, and tossed a bit into her mouth. The muscles below you trembled with mocking, drunken laughter. "Hahaha! All that over this weak stuff?" She turned it upside-down on herself, emptying a raging river of sake on her body. It cascaded off her curving bosom, steamed around her midriff, to her feet below, leaving a glimmer coating every inch of skin. "Here, have it all!"