@DSG, this story /is/ a thriller. It legit has me reading the chapters so urgently because of the suspense it has me in. And this is coming from a guy who comes to this site only for the fetish side of stories. This story has me so wrapped into the story that it’s insane. If you go into stories (especially crime thrillers) expecting perfectness, you’re gonna be disappointed most (if not all) of the time. Even a movie I view as near perfect (The Dark Knight), I can admit it has quite a few flaws in the story (namely, the Joker’s plan relies on a lot of luck). To bash a story as much as you have just cuz there’s a bit of plot armor on the main character is just crazy.

And it also blows my mind that you say CurseCrazy hasn’t “shown” that Melanie is cute (which I assume you mean personality wise and not physical). It’s actually blown me away how much character CC has put into this story with every single character but especially with Melanie. The way she stutters around everyone even her roommate who she lives with and especially with Adrian who is her biggest crush of all, the way she’s shy and awkward in social interactions. These are attributes that a lot of people find “cute”. You may not (I’m curious what attributes you find cute and how you’d prefer them being presented in stories tbh), but that doesn’t mean that the Melanie character isn’t written well or fleshed out. This might not be my top favorite story of all time on this site but it’s definitely the best written one by far imo.

Man I legit never click on anything faster than when you post a new chapter! I have it set for it to send me a notification each time you post a new one. I so can’t wait for each and every new chapter! I’m so intrigued on where this story is going!! The torture of Bradz was honestly one of my favorite parts of this story (second only to Candy being swallowed)! Hope the next chapter isn’t as long as a wait as this one but even if it is, I’m sure it’ll be just as perfect as this one!!

Author's Response:

So much energy in this review, I love it! Thank you for such encouraging words. This chapter was a little late, heh. It was a little on the longer side, and I was debating for awhile just how to divide up these final few chapters. I didn't want it to run on for so long, but I really couldn't feel any better alternatives. I was also sick for a couple days, which didn't help. At all. But I'm glad you enjoyed it enough that one of the scenes could be heralded as a favorite! I didn't expect that from this chapter, of all chapters, to be honest... Well, as always, thanks for the review! (And if you live in the states, then... sorry for these 1 am notifications! My schedule is pretty funny in that regard...)