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Reviewer: pixl8ed Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: December 09 2017 11:13 AM Title: Flashes from the past

Wow, things become clearer and give Alejandro even more reason to not like biggies. 

I’m not really sure what those around him are planning to impose on him, but I hope his recovered memories mess it all up. 

The politest plan I could see them coming up with would be presented something like this.

“Alejandro, you are right.  Our products are targeted completely toward the (big dummy) market and have neglected lesser beings like yourself.  You are intelligent and inventive.  We would like to create a position for you at the company as a minor marketing and development consultant.”

Whatever the plan, I hope he smells the set up and lets them know it.  He has every right to say “I know from past experience I cannot count on Shannon.  So it would be foolish to put myself in a position of having to rely on her in any way.  Let alone putting myself within her sphere of power.”

Enough on speculation.  Great chapter.  The idea of letting Shannon and Alejandro “get just a taste of each other” and them separating them is really quite brilliant.  It’s a classic romance tactic but is handled in a fresh way by the layers of conflict within the story. 

I’m not particularly invested in a Alejandro/Shannon relationship.  I’d much rather see Alejandro make some attempt to fly on his own, succeed or fail, before he does what every other tiny does.  He deserves to discover his own worth, in his own terms, before he has to resort to having some stuck up, self centered biggie give him some affirmation that they find him useful.

The families suddenly seem less likeable in their conspiring.  Like his family is like his friends were, conforming to “what biggies do” before considering him.  And the reasoning behind their conspiring seems pretty vile.  It’s as though they’ve started to see Alejandro as a problem and not a member of their family.  Truthfully, I have hopes that Lindsay or Al will realize their duty to their brother over their adherence to “a biggie thing.”  Because otherwise Alejandro will be left with absolutely no one he can trust and rely on.  Of course, that might lead to him being even more independent and strong, so maybe it’s a good thing in the long run.

I do like how Alejandro has Shannon in perspective.  She’s desirable, but not worth his self respect.  She’s not worth his soul. 

Great work.  As you can see; thought provoking and rich. I’m loving this story more and more.  Thank you for acting on Notsirk’s inspiration and sharing it with all of us.  Top notch work.

Peace,

pix



Author's Response:

Hum, I had something more "plain" in mind for their trap... but yeah, Alejandro's past memories will mess with them. So far, he's the one with the character growth, but I plan on working on Shannon soon enough, she has to develop (well, technically she has developed rather well, but you get my point !). I really want her to actually get what the problems are and try to change herself and the world, so if NotSirk want to make uses of her, he'll have a lot of material to do so as he sees fit (that's his universe, after all^^). She has the clout and wealth to do so, or at least she will. But she needs a strong moral compass, and I think Alejandro would be able to do that. I kind of like the idea of someone so small, figuratively and realistically (socially, he IS a nobody, even if he ended with Shannon, he would still be "Shannon's minor", nothing else, to most MAJORS), being able to influence things for the better in the long term. Doesn't mean he has to become what MAJORS want him to become for doing so however, I've some ideas for him to achieve this without selling his soul.

As for Alejandro's family, it'll be explained in a special chapter why they feel the way they do and what they truly want for him, don't worry ;) !

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