Date: December 15 2017 7:15 PM Title: Chapter 14: Deep Sea Mission
Obviously you can't tell, but my heart shattered in two...
Our lovely heroine lost her eye... :'(
What even made it more sad was when she asked Zero if she was still pretty and broke down crying. Have I mentioned how I love how Sammy still has a girly side to her and a badass who can kick Kaiju butt?
No you didn't but thanks for letting me know. Just because she's a 350 foot Kaiju killing machine doesn't mean she can't still have some girly moments
Date: December 14 2017 9:14 AM Title: Chapter 14: Deep Sea Mission
"Victory... costs. Everytime you pay a little more." - Prophet
Was a quote I had to think of when I read this chapter.
Really sad to see Sammy hurt so much.
Thank you for writing, and I am looking forward to the next installment (if Sammy gets fixed there ).
Very true words, Sammy has lost a little more over time. A scratch or a scar didn't really bother her too much but an eye is something much more important. Hopefully she can recover to a certain point but she will never be the same again.
Date: December 14 2017 7:13 AM Title: Chapter 14: Deep Sea Mission
Oh wow. That was really a heartfelt ending. Sammy has grown so much as a character and this feels like a horrible set back for her. I want to make a joke about her getting her beer, but it just feels cruel.
The ending also brings the limitations of Zero as a companion into sharp focus. The interesting thing is, rather than seek a higher quality of companion (a certain reporter comes to mind,) Sammy settles for her AI. I wonder if she’s doing so because her mission was classified or because she thinks she doesn’t deserve anything better. Her self doubts seem to be driving her to lower, darker places lately.
I enjoyed her interacting with the Navy, and the Admiral came off as a well developed character, but I would suggest that they would have deployed some manner of missile or better yet, anti submarine weapon, detonating it underwater to alert Sammy that there was a problem. Just a suggestion.
Also, again I have to bring up the technology of the world. If they have AI and gravity manipulation technology, soft tissue regeneration should be something they are at least developing. Harvesting Sammy’s own stem cells and surgically planting them in her empty eye socket, aided by her own amazing healing abilities, could have a chance of making her whole again. But really all that illustrates is how much I care about her now.
Perhaps she will grow stronger in other ways now. Perhaps she will have people pouring out affection and gratitude to her, like the sailors on those ships she protected. Maybe this situation, weather she heals in the long run or not, will make her see she is cared for and maybe even return those feelings, somehow.
Great story. Great characters. Thank you for keeping at it.
Sometimes a joke can make a dark situation seem better but unfortunately this ins't one of those times.
Well for Zero the A.I is a character who can't be intimidated, will not think any less of her and doesn't see her as a freak in any way.
Yeah I really should have thought of that, hindsight is 20/20. If I had a chance to re-write I'd probably add something like that in.
That might be true but I feel like having a strong A.I. is closer to reality than her re-growing her eye. For gravity manipulation, well that's just my love for DBZ.
That is an idea although right now I don't think Sammy wants to be seen by anyone.
Date: December 09 2017 2:07 AM Title: Chapter 13: Tantrum
The emphasis on Sammy’s cooking makes me think you are hinting at a connection between her disease and the Kaiju meat. I wonder...
Sammy’s king kong moment served to remind the audience of her dangerous qualities without the too disrupting, over dramatic fallout that would have resulted from such a display in public.
Zero knocks out Sammy and she just forgives him and takes responsibility for her actions? Wow, that really makes her relationship with the AI more complex and interesting. It’s actually seeming like good prep for her having more “real” relationships. Nice, angle.
Senator Gallows really surprised me this chapter. He’s using real leadership skills and not just saying “do as you’re told.” He came off as way less of a jerk. I’m actually happy to see him developed as a character.
I was very happy as a reader with this chapter. Great, engaging work. Thank you for sharing this yet again and enjoy your writing efforts.
There might be a connection but the meat is tested before it is consumed.
Well when you're big, have large muscles and have your mind blown by a Kaiju the chances of being calm are very low.
Sammy isn't entirely a monster and she can see where she is at fault. She also knows what would have happened if Zero hadn't of stepped in. She knows that he always has her interestes in mind.
Thanks, he's not an evil person but instead a man who finds himself in a situation that he had never prepared for. There were no classes on how to deal with a giant woman.
Date: December 08 2017 12:24 PM Title: Chapter 1: Pilot
Wow, this guy below me ... reviews. His feedback is so professional!
And now the true intention of taking away Sammy's beer reveals itself: they use it when they want Sammy to do something. Clever.
Also, that is one sturdy doorpost to survive Sammy bumping into it.
Thank you for writing, as always!
Thanks, I appreciate the feedback and the doorpost is strong. It has to carry a lot of weight.
Date: November 29 2017 12:36 PM Title: Chapter 12: In The Mind
I have been negligent in my reviews...national novel writing month,you know. Sorry.
However, reviewing the last chapters together works for me as it looks like you’ve been examining Sammy from the inside (in the most recent chapter) and from the outside (her relationship with Leslie and with the community at large.)
I have to say this sort of “character symmetry” is the sort of thing that really pulls me in as a reader. You are both developing her and examining her at the same time. It comes off sophisticated and entertaining.
I am really enjoying how elements of the community have lead to her accepting them and have resulted in them accepting her further, a sort of “I misjudged you, you’re not so bad” dynamic is emerging that I find natural and yet sweet.
Though elements of darkness and mistrust (or at least caution) remain, illustrated so well by Leslie’s apprehension.
Dream sequences tend to annoy me as a writing device, but using a hallucination to reveal Sammy’s inner wishes worked so well and carried such emotional impact that I really enjoyed the read. And came away with sympathy for our favorite Kaiju buster.
I am really impressed with the story you are telling. It has complex layers and characters and is what I read for. Thank you so much for sharing this and I hope you keep enjoying telling Sammy’s story
Thanks for the detailed review and I didn't mind the wait, we all have real life things to deal with.
Hopefully the story will continue to keep you invested.
Date: November 29 2017 12:34 PM Title: Chapter 1: Pilot
Ahw, poor Sammy.
I was gonna say something about the difference between standing up for yourself and being a country threatening menace and Sammy simply running for president if they are still not convinced, but I think Sammy is starting to have some other things to tend to first.
Good addition as always, and thank you for writing!
Thank you for your review. She does have a lot on her plate.
Date: November 22 2017 1:11 PM Title: Chapter 1: Pilot
Whoops, seems like I missed last weeks update. Oh well, twice the fun!
And I must agree with the previous reviewers about Sammy's charming personality.
I'm starting to wonder if Sammy should up her agressiveness game to get some more privileges and resources, poor girl still doesn't have that beer
Also nice cliffhanger at the end.
Glad to see you back.
Sammy does have to be careful, if she seems too aggressive the government might see her as a threat. Who knows, maybe she'll have her beer at some point
Date: November 16 2017 11:25 AM Title: Chapter 1: Pilot
I'm torn on this story. To me, it's interesting enough to keep reading, but the lack of significant action keeps me only liking it, instead of loving it.
Can't have action all the time but don't worry here will be plenty more in the future
Date: November 08 2017 5:17 PM Title: Chapter 9: An Unwanted Visitor
There's something charming about Sammy that I love. Maybe it's the fact that you made her so realistic in terms of her personality. The envy she had for Leslie's dress was a nice way show Sammy's feminine side AND her desire to be normal again. Poor girl lost her father and ended up going down a dark road. When she stuck up that old man, I had some mix feelings about her though. We could clearly see Sammy isn't the greatest of individuals but she's far from the worst. You sir or ma'am have a way with character development. ;)
Thanks for the review, I needed to get Sammy with a crime that would get her a long stretch in prison but not something that was completely unforgivable. Thank you for reading and I hope that you enjoy the rest
Date: November 08 2017 10:47 AM Title: Chapter 1: Pilot
Nice insight into Sammy's past and into giantess fans in this chapter.
Also nice to see that not everyone hates Sammy, which hopefully translates in Sammy getting a more warm pesonality towards others.
I also wonder if that Kaiju meat has something to do with Sammy's disease/transformation thingy
Oh, I also have a small request (but you don't have to implement it of course!): could you maybe sometimes add some more details that show that Sammy is really REALLY big?
Sammy seems to be quite intimidating, but sometimes it feels as if it could also be a 6ft Sammy. Examples of what I mean would be things breaking/shaking around in the streets / people blown to the side a bit by breath/unable to keep balance. These details are already present at some places, like when they started cooking food at the science facility when she arrived to make sure there was enough., but maybe adding them more frequently will make the story a bit better.
Thank you for writing! It was a good addition as always.
thanks for the response.
The meat gets tested before she consumes it, they are quite careful
Ok, I'll keep that in mind, thanks for the tip.
Date: November 04 2017 8:51 AM Title: Chapter 8: Cornered
Wow, there is so much going on here. And all these story elements are so cool. Life and death consequences. Multi-layered character interaction. Scheming politicians. And now a medical mystery with scientists against the wall. You really know how to weave a great yarn.
Sammy is still complex and developing as a character. She seems to be softening in some ways but getting more interesting as a person. I didn’t really like the idea of her “hulking out” at first, but when her thoughts of Charlie triggered it, my heart kinda melted. Nice work.
I still think you are missing opportunities to “up’ the drama and suspense with your hyper efficient prose, but the story is so solid and the characters are so good that it’s only a minor distraction.
I love the mosaic of characters and the fantastical situations. All the plots and subplots are forming up nicely. Really, really cool stuff.
Thank you for sharing this and happy national novel writing month.
Thanks for the feedback. It is much appreciated and I do hope that the story stays to your high standards.
Happy National Novel Writing Month to you too.
Date: November 01 2017 3:40 PM Title: Chapter 1: Pilot
Hmmm denied beer and suddenly a deadly disease pops up. Suspicious
I hope this doesn't mean that this story will be killed off :( I like Sammy to much.
But seriously, nice view into Sammy's backstory and emotions. Thank you for writing! I already look forward to the next installment
PS it looks like this review section is becoming my echo chamber
You're welcome, maybe she can be saved or the disease could be too much for her.
Well there are a couple of others who have reviewed as well.
Date: October 26 2017 3:38 PM Title: Chapter 1: Pilot
Lol, I could also get that beer for Sammy, if she survives.
The new chapter is a nice addition to the story and finally gives her some more power so she can finally get that beer sponsorship.
Thanks, hopefully she will get the beer that she needs.
Date: October 20 2017 12:28 AM Title: Chapter 1: Pilot
Very nice addition to the story! You are a very good story teller.
Sammy is also an interesting character and it's nice to learn more about her,
but I think Sammy needs a hug now right now.
Thanks it is much appreciated.
Sammy would probably tell you that she needs a beer.
Date: October 18 2017 9:14 PM Title: Chapter 6: Nicities and Nightmares
Sammy and this hacker creep seem to have super heroine super villain thing going on.
I like her aloofness with the reporter. It gave the scene a feeling of her not wanting to be there for the interview, but for the company. Nice and subtle.
It's pretty cool how you are combining slice of life scenes with action in the story. Good, fun work.
I'm pretty curious where you want to take this and I hope you're having fun getting there.
Thanks for the review, I very much appreciate you ongoing support.
Date: October 18 2017 8:07 PM Title: Chapter 6: Nicities and Nightmares
This is a really good story you've got here. To think some women would feel empowered being a giantess but you've shown the struggles Sammy goes through that it's know wonder she's so grumpy. I love her character because when it's all said and done, we still see that she's still human inside and not a delusional goddess wannabe who sees herself as superior. My heart ached a bit when she was trying to get Zero to have a normal conversation with her. I hope that hacker gets caught soon. I wonder who it is?
Thanks for your comments, I wanted to go with the realistic option since giant women who go mad with power is unlikely. For the hacker... well we'll find out soon enough.
Date: October 18 2017 4:57 PM Title: Chapter 6: Nicities and Nightmares
Pretty good chapter. I had forgotten about the hacker so it was a good surprise. Nicely done.
Thanks, it is much appreciated and it shows that even humans can still physically hurt Sammy.
Date: October 11 2017 5:53 PM Title: Chapter 5: A Pleasant Swim
A nice snapshot of Sammy's view of the world. Her morbid curiosity about the ship brings her negativity into focus. Great character moments with her keeper and with Zero.
Her inner pain explains a lot of her abrasive qualities and I can't help but feel for someone so alone. Interesting how she's experimenting with being pleasant to someone who isn't Zero. Perhaps her encounter with Charlie has opened her mind to possibilities.
Charlie and Zero both raise questions. What kind of technology are we looking at in this world? AI is a pretty advanced thing to bring to bear, but no one has found a way to give Charlie a version of Sammy's healing ability? Some sort of view of the technology we are dealing with might bring the world into a little more focus.
I still think that Sammy seems like the sort of person I wouldn't enjoy being around, but her character arc seems to be getting more and more interesting. Your character work has been very good in this story so far. Sammy is multifaceted and getting more complex and thus more compelling.
Thank you for continuing and congratulations on another chapter.
You're welcome. Thank you for the lengthy comment.
Sammy is a character who thanks to her size does live in isolation so she would be lonely.
The story does take place in the near future so AI have advanced to a certain point but the cure for cancer is just out of reach. it would come in time but not quick enough for poor Charlie.