Reviews For Unlawful Desire
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Reviewer: Jay Signed [Report This]
Date: April 01 2007 10:09 PM Title: Chapter 1

Good first attempt. I would recommend you work on incorporating more descriptions of the foot scenes in futrure stories. Describe in detail the person's regret over their current circumstances along with the giantess's growing cruelty.

 

Also, I'm a fan of stories like this that focus on describing the slowly mounting terror of the little one at being at, in this case, his sister's feet.  Perhaps having the girl spew cruel insults at her brother would be good as well.

 

All in all, great first story. In the future, I'd focus on more descriptions of the brother's torture and sister's joy at inflicting it. 



Author's Response: I think your right it didnt feel very descriptive looking back, I hope you will enjoy my next one when its finished

Reviewer: billyevil Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: April 01 2007 11:33 AM Title: Chapter 1

This is one of the best stories I've read in quite a while. I know that feeling of finding a girl's sock disgarded and the overwhelming curiousity to smell it.

I really hope you write more as you have captured the fetish very well and kept it both fun and exciting to read. I hope this short review encourages you to continue, because I do think you have a talent for writing stories and will add alot to this site on the whole with your work. Thank you!

One funny thing was when they were talking back and forth I kept getting flashbacks to the old Connect Four commercials with the brother and sister.

Michelle "I win!"
Ryan "where? I don't see it.."
Michelle "See here...diagonally.."
Ryan "Pretty sneaky sis!"
*Michelle smiles in triumph*
Ryan "Bitch.."
Michelle "I'm a bitch??"
*Michelle stomps Ryan like a bug!*

Author's Response: Glad you liked it, im making another incest story similar to it but ill have alot more descriptiveness to it.

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