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Reviewer: Olo Signed [Report This]
Date: August 15 2016 6:53 AM Title: Feet

Names make description easier.  Even if the narrator doesn't take the time to learn her tinies' names, she should make some up.

If you want to get closer to the personalities—of both the narrator as well as the tinies—consider writing the actual dialogue instead of just summarizing the conversation.

Reviewer: UserDoesNotExist Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: August 13 2016 3:14 PM Title: Feet

I liked this chapter. It was a weird sense of cruel but she seemed lonely too, like a complex character. Seeing the tinies embrace eachother and her reaction to it was also interesting, not sure why she'd vomit from it though.

Good stuff.

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