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Reviewer: AdamX Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: December 04 2015 6:33 PM Title: Chapter 2

It's going a little differently from what I was first expecting but defnitely a quality read.

Reviewer: Nostory Signed [Report This]
Date: December 03 2015 9:22 AM Title: Chapter 2

Choosing to let us imagine the look of the main character is normal but this is for a woman when most of us are men, its quite a bold move. Hope it works and this world you've made, the idea that magic is legal and known is some what surprising to me. 

Reviewer: MostKnownUnknowns Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: December 01 2015 1:39 AM Title: Chapter 1 A Quasi Repaired Mind

Loving this so far. Please continue. Good character development.

Reviewer: AdamX Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: November 30 2015 3:22 PM Title: Chapter 1 A Quasi Repaired Mind

Great start, its rare to see this type of concept fleshed out upon in the community.

 

Also the witch gives me a Bayonetta vibe as I read most of the story especially her dialogue in her voice. 

Reviewer: Story smith Signed [Report This]
Date: November 30 2015 9:50 AM Title: Chapter 1 A Quasi Repaired Mind

Seems good so far. My only advice is when doing first person to imputed more of the five senses than just sight. What does yor cheracter smell when entering a room? what taste doe the air have? What does the fabric feel like when she sits on a couch. Probably the hardest thing about first person is to give enough detail about the surroundings with out causing sensory overload. 

 

Thatsjust my imputed though form reading countless stories and books. As of today I have yet to accomplish more than a page when trying to write a story.

 

Reviewer: Nostory Signed [Report This]
Date: November 30 2015 9:41 AM Title: Chapter 1 A Quasi Repaired Mind

Wow, nice start! I like where this is going, seems this is a giantess( not now but I imagine he got shrunk quite a bit in the past) trying to make amends. A rare thing to see on the site. Cannot to see the rest of it!

Reviewer: Barrowman Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: November 30 2015 9:08 AM Title: Chapter 1 A Quasi Repaired Mind

Interesting beginning. This witch seems pretty dangerous.

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