Reviews For No More Than Ten
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Reviewer: AbsentStar Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: November 28 2014 10:00 PM Title: Lunch Like Usual

I like it.  I like it very much.

Reviewer: ADash Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: November 24 2014 12:09 AM Title: Lunch Like Usual

My favorite story on this site, and I've been lurking for years. Created an account just to review it!



Author's Response:

:) I plan to make a sequel some time in the future, but I'm working on another series right now if you're interested!

Reviewer: Nostory Signed [Report This]
Date: October 22 2014 7:59 AM Title: Zero Day

  I actually enjoyed this story, good one for your first try and if there is a sequel, I'd love to read it!

I have a few things to add, some good, some are more like what I think could be improved but understand that no matter what I type next, I still like this story enough to read its sequel from start to finish. 

Good:

-I feel Jessica's pain, the dilemma she felt as she struggled between eating to survive and her moral compass telling her to stop, I really sympathised with her,

-Dustin's own problems I could feel as well, from running away to having to face Jessica when he has been cheating on her. Would she eat him upon learning of his betrayal or would she forgive him? Really kept me guessing.

-Not letting this degenerate into a huge orgy where Jessica pleasures herself using people and the city, we got enough of that now. 

Room for Improvement:

-Michael felt underdeveloped, he could have had more time, to flesh him out and he felt isolated at times when it seemed he would be better off with someone to interact with. 

-I think you could be more descriptive with the actions, it is good you got into the heads of our characters but when it comes to their actions, like perhaps when Jessica is eating people, to really get the punch needed you could have dedicated more words to her actions.

-Pacing felt rushed towards the end but I tend to enjoy a story that builds up slowly so this might not be a valid point, bit iffy on this one. 

 

 That's really all I've got, hope to see something soon!



Author's Response:

Thanks for the review! These are all things I'll definitely consider when I write more in the future (I already have a couple ideas...). This is still a bit of a new experience for me so I still have a lot to learn. With help from supporters like you, I'll be among the big name writers in no time! :P

Reviewer: timescribe Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 21 2014 4:10 PM Title: Zero Day

I must say I'll miss her.

Reviewer: timescribe Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 21 2014 4:07 PM Title: Thunder and Lightning

Dustin sure lives dangerously.

Reviewer: timescribe Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 21 2014 4:03 PM Title: This So-Called 'Jessica'

Although I wouldn't call her a goddess, I must say that Jessica's attitude has evolved from regret to taunting and teasing and giggling in a very thrilling way for vore fans such as myself.

Reviewer: timescribe Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 21 2014 3:57 PM Title: Chained

The prison was a great idea, and the teeth to separate the cuffed men. The by play between Dustin and Jessica is now the hilight of the story. I rarely subscribe to a story as a favorite, just browse most recent, but this one has me rivetted.

Reviewer: timescribe Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 21 2014 3:49 PM Title: Love and Death

"My fingers were upon him in an instant, bringing them close so I could give it the procedural check-up, expecting no results as always."

That's great. If I were Justin, I'd want to be with her too, or swallowed whole by her. Being with her for a while, and knowing that I'd be eaten further down the track would be the best deal of all.

Reviewer: timescribe Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 21 2014 3:46 PM Title: Dustin's Peril

The relationship would sure have an interesting dynamic.

Reviewer: timescribe Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 21 2014 3:38 PM Title: Pursuing the Beast

And now we have the man's POV.

"She's on all the Channels" could be funny. Maybe she's bigger than all the station buildings. 

One thing I wondered about chapter 1. If she was 600 feet tall, why would she have bitten down on the businessman? Wouldn't he have easily gone down whole?

Reviewer: timescribe Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 21 2014 3:34 PM Title: Lunch Like Usual

This was phenomenally graphic in its description, not just of the eating, but of the thoughts that went through the giantess's mind while leading up to it, and while doing it. Are you into vore yourself, or just writing it for the readers' to fantasize?

Here's something I put on another site, which might change your outlook on one thing you said in this chapter, for the best, I hope. 

https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3036038/1/The-Prayer-Necessities

I loved this line: "I even stuck out my tongue and let him enjoy the view"

Love to chat any time too.

peterthewryter@gmail.com 

 



Author's Response:

I do enjoy vore particularly, but really I like everything about destructive giantesses, so this story was an experiment to write giantess without writing mindless murder. Even I must admit a soft spot for gentle, however. Really everything about giantesses is fascinating. And to answer our question about biting down, it's Jessica being merciful. She knows swallowing them whole would be far more painful and horrifying. It also helps her disassociate them as people... they're more like food when she chews them. 

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed [Report This]
Date: October 21 2014 2:21 PM Title: Zero Day

I'm a little dissapointed about this chapter, I'm not gonna lie. This chapter didn't really feel like it solved anything or concluded the story in any way. Sorry about being harsh, but I really liked this story and I feel like this ending could have been better.



Author's Response:

Sorry to hear you weren't pleased with the ending. My intention was to leave things a bit open-ended to leave debate over what 'the monster' really was. I'll have to look it over some time and see if maybe I can spruce it up a bit.

Reviewer: Kusanagi Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 17 2014 2:13 PM Title: Thunder and Lightning

Excellent chapter, never would have thought that Justin being honest about his infidelity could result in anything other than his death and instead it might just have save the world.

Really given her personality being in flux almost anything could happen next chapter should she survive, and there's the very real possibility she didn't. Either way looking forward to seeing how this ends.

Reviewer: desslok Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 17 2014 8:14 AM Title: Thunder and Lightning

Excent work as always - my only criticisim? The continuity problem, where he is trapped between her toes, she lifts her feet into the air and then he comforts her by touching her lips. Thats one hell of a contortion for her to reach (or he has a super long pinky! :) )



Author's Response:

She starts crying and brings him down before that, balling around him like when they slept in 'Awakening' 

Reviewer: aaron Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 17 2014 6:21 AM Title: Thunder and Lightning

Spectacular chapter. I'm looking forward to see what we will see next. Would be neat if she somehow finds Melissa and knows who she is and what she did. I think that would make for an interesting situation considering she's changed(which I'm assuming she has). Wonder what will happen if the bomb has no effect on her? Will that trigger her bloodlust once again? I'm looking forward to the last chapter(kinda sad ita ending) but I wish she could somehow reunite with either her parents or Dustin's.

aaron
PS nice touch not having her kill Dustin. I like this human Jessica.

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 16 2014 9:19 PM Title: Thunder and Lightning

I dont know how shes supposed to make up for all the people shes killed at this point but Im glad at least shes trying to repent a little and feels bad about what shes done. I will be pleasantly surprised if you dont end the story with her death or her surviving and going evil again.

To me those two endings are the easiest and most generic ways this story could end. But considering you only have a chapter left to end this i cant see this ending any other way. Whatever you choose i hope you give it a long chapter, this story was great and deserves a proper ending that doesnt feel rushed!

Reviewer: Nostory Signed [Report This]
Date: October 16 2014 8:09 PM Title: Thunder and Lightning

Think she'll still die, quite a rollercoaster chapter and honestly, fits Jessica's current personality. It's too late, saving one tunnnel of people won't undo the damage she has done and frankly, unless Michael and Dustin can convince the commander to hold off the missile.

Dustin will probably die if he isn't running for his life now. 

 

Reviewer: Nostory Signed [Report This]
Date: October 16 2014 9:10 AM Title: This So-Called 'Jessica'

 I was hoping she'd retain some essence of her humanity left but the tables have turned, the once whispering monster is now in charge and the human Jessica is in the shadows. 

I don't think there is any hope left, it'll require a great force to change Jessica, not sure what could force it since she has declared herself a goddess. Dustin is scared shitless, her parents could but they're MIA so there's really nothing left. 

 

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed [Report This]
Date: October 16 2014 2:21 AM Title: This So-Called 'Jessica'

Shes practically become an egomaniac with a goddess complex like gts on this site...Hopefully some of the good in her comes back and fights because at this point im just waiting till she gets nuked.

Reviewer: youre_my_slave Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: October 14 2014 11:37 PM Title: Chained

It seems like Jessica's succumbed to the worst type of madness, the type where a bit of your conscience is still there and fighting, but every day you slip a little more into the cesspool of insanity until you don't remember who you are. If I were in Jessica's situation, I'd be SCREAMING for the army to nuke me.

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