Reviews For Incorporated
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Reviewer: Carycomic Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: January 29 2016 12:15 PM Title: Like Trying to Court a Goddess

Hmmmm! Sounds like the same propaganda spouted by the man-shrinking giantesses in one of my own stories: INVASION OF THE BATON TWIRLERS FROM OUTER SPACE.*

*This has been a shameless self-plug. ;-)

Reviewer: chrlorez Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 10 2014 4:51 AM Title: Like Trying to Court a Goddess

Did I become an influence on the writers here all of a sudden? I have a crippling fear of having influence on people, because that makes me responsible if people don't like the chapters. That being said, I did like the chapter. Although, the last few sentences might need proofreading. I enjoy following David around, because he seems like the only truly decent male in the series oddly enough.

As a black male who tries his hardest to treat women just as badly as men, I severely dislike Mary because a) I dislike any group that uses Supremacy in their name, and 2) the group itself is not only being sexist by portraying half of the entire wold's population as violent sociopaths by nature, but have also decided to support their argument by conveniently forgetting that the fundamental cultural implications of the patriarchy are the reason men are so dominant over women and not the men themselves, and they should be campaigning for complete gender equality.

Unfortunately for me, she brought up "John Harvey" in front of Linda. So what I want you to do is ignore my rant above and play what's coming as you planned to before. Because I'd rather see where this is going than see Linda utterly destroy her argument and kill the plot dead in its tracks. That's my job, and mine alone!

Reviewer: aaron Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 09 2014 9:16 PM Title: Like Trying to Court a Goddess

Great chapters. Have missed quite a few. Was very surprised that Sofia was a lesbian with s human but I'm really looking forward to more of them. And now this might be when Linda becomes more dominant in her relationship with David. Great chapters, I can't wait to see what happens next.

aaron

Reviewer: Ancient Relic Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: October 09 2014 5:19 PM Title: Like Trying to Court a Goddess

Instead of starting each section with (Location), describe the location. It looks unfinished, like a placeholder.

You succeeded in moving the plot forward, though. Much conflict can come out of the conversation at the end.

Reviewer: Macro_Rebecca Signed [Report This]
Date: October 09 2014 4:19 PM Title: Like Trying to Court a Goddess

I knew I didn't like Mary XD

 

Good chapter though, and I suppose now we see what the main conflict of the story will be. Should be interesting.

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