[Report This]Date: December 14 2014 12:34 AM Title: Story
The story jumped around very quickly. I know you were aiming for a short one, but focusing on one or two events rather than quickly rattling off ideas will be a lot more successful. The story was hard to follow and shows a lack of concern for craft through a lack of proofreading, flow, or originality.
[Report This]Date: August 17 2014 1:20 PM Title: Story
This could have been very, very nice story from the ideas and all, the butt action which i am a great fan of and the unaware used Imogen but...its way to short for the action done, some spoken lines would be nice, also some parts of the story written from the two girls point of view.
Author's Response: Thanks that's some great advise. I've been thinking about changing the content in my shorter stories like this one. I will do it but only when I've finished all my uncompleted stories first.
Date: August 02 2014 10:06 AM Title: Story
You are a very good new writer. But please only focus on one story of a time if you can. I see you make new ones a lot and it fills up the recent page. It's goid, just try and commit to 1 story at a time.
[Report This]Date: July 26 2014 9:03 PM Title: Story
I've been reading your stories and think you are doing a great job but seeing the same names in the stories gets a little old after 3-4 stories. Other than that keep up the good work.