[Report This]Date: July 17 2015 2:27 PM Title: Cut Short
The mother is being to hard on Corey. This utter humilitian will destroy the relationship between the two siblings. His sister will never look up to him again or take him seriously. He will never be as passionate and loving big brother again when they for example have soccer practice. He will be more indifferent, reluctant or fearfull around her. His self confidence around his sister is gone. There is also a little feeling of betrayal. The mother clearly favors Claire above Corey when she let here choose the size and that she says that his child sister is more trustworthy than him and that her sister can do anything she wants to him. And by the tone I get the feeling that Claire doesn't want it to be the only weekend ever where she gets to play with a shrunken big brother and that she even have an incentive now too lie about situations so that her mother can shrink him again. And I get the feeling that the mother would always believe Claire's word over his. Than you have three against one and that will definitely feel like betrayal/cornered be the people you trust and love most. That feeling hurts like hell.
Claire is also the victim in this. Because she will notice in time that her brother will be avoiding her more or be indifferent or fearfull and not be the happy confident loving big brother she used to have. The level of trust will never be the same again.
The mother should think before she does something so devastating.
Date: August 22 2014 9:12 PM Title: Cut Short
Is this story DOA?
Author's Response:
It was just a little oneshot experiment in story setup I felt like doing :x. Though I will eventually be revisiting the family in this setting, albeit a few years later.
Date: July 21 2014 3:15 AM Title: Cut Short
Is it wrong that I find this hilarious?
Author's Response:
Nah. It's meant to be a cute/funny little thing :3
[Report This]Date: July 10 2014 2:27 PM Title: Cut Short
I'm understanding more about this. I wasn't certain whether the characters were being entirely themselves, but considering this is an entire different universe, it makes sense that their actions change as well. I do think I was quick to judge this story so far, and it's my mistake for trying to review properly without reading "The Shrink Act Files" first. I'm being too negative. And in retrospect, it's kind of stupid to make my main complaint about this story about it being too short, while simultaneously saying I'm too lazy to read what's essentially what I believe this story is missing.
I'm still however defending my right to be too lazy to take an hour out of my week to read a single story! So there!!!
I'm revising my final rating of this story to 4.5 stars. I still think the story was incredibly well-written and pretty interesting, despite my lack of complete adoration for it that I had for Consequences and your other sh*t (I'm not calling your work sh*t. I think your work's da sh*t.). So to even out my score, I'm giving this new review 5 stars. Plus the Matthew McConaughey seal of approval!
[Report This]Date: July 10 2014 8:59 AM Title: Cut Short
Eh, bbppppttt, huh, eck, mmnnnn. Uh... how do I start this review off?
Last week, I spent most of my limited free time starting an HBO show you may have heard of called "True Detective". It's gotten super high ratings on IMDB, some of the highest I've ever seen. But when I watched the first episode, I wasn't impressed very much, and I thought the show was grossly overrated.
This is how I kinda feel about this chapter. The thing about "True Detective" though is that the story really started to pick up after episode 3, and by the end, I thought the show was fantastic.
But, the thing says that the story is complete. I really hope it isn't, because I can see that this story picking up next chapter.
About this chapter, though. I don't know whether this is an out-of-character moment for everybody or nobody. Abigail sounds a little too harsh on Corey, I think? Claire is a little too excited about shrinking him that much, I think? Do they realize that shrinking is very life-threatening, even with the most excellent care. Maybe I need to read "The Shrink Act Files" to get into this story, but I kinda don't want to. I'm lazy and busy with other things in life.
I don't know. I'm just not into this yet.
Author's Response:
Well, I mean, I did say that it was a one-shot in the story notes. It's essentially an experiment in story setup that I did because I felt like it.
As for the rest...I don't know, man. Don't really know what to tell you besides that I'm sorry it wasn't to your liking. I think it's unfair to say "I'm busy and don't have time to look into the details of this universe" and still make a judgment upon it, honestly. Shrinking is the norm over in this universe. It's very much viewed as "safe." Hence why it's treated as such.
As for character...it's pretty in-character, man. You just have to realize that despite a lot carrying over from Omega, these aren't exactly the same people. They have entirely different life experiences because they're not in a world with genetic size differences that sees one person being uniquely damaged due to her shitty, traumatizing past while the other has grown up with an overwhelming responsibility to nurture and protect a race the size of ants to her while still viewing them as capable people worth protecting. None of that baggage is over here, despite some rough analogues in Abby's upbringing. Abby IS a strict mother when she needs to be. Claire IS eager to spend time with and play with her brother. We're talking about a girl who, at the same age as she is in this little short, ascribed the status of a god to herself and was seriously contemplating using her newly realized authority to take over her brother's life (albeit in a completely benevolent manner). That's not something she has over here, so all that's left is the eagerness at being able to hold, protect, and spend time with someone she adores. Girl likes hanging out with her brother, and over here the only way to make that better for her is to make it so that she's hanging out with her tiny brother.
[Report This]Date: July 09 2014 5:30 PM Title: Cut Short
I wonder if THIS world's Melody is crushing on Corey? Since Claire and Corey's relationship seems about as good as in the Omegaverse, I don't anticipate too many bad things happenning, except she might be a little too clingy and touchy-feely. Insisting that Corey participate in everything she is doing and where ever she goes. And probably a teddy bear snuggle at bed time. I like these characters no matter which world they're stuck in. Which reminds me, I hope you get back around to Contract: Tower Witch again.
Author's Response:
Heheh, it would probably be a safe bet :3
As I just responded below, yeah, Corey basically just has a weekend of somewhat embarassing doting ahead of him. They're not gonna do anything to him, nor would Claire or Melody allow any of their other friends to do anything at practice. Claire definitely is grabby as hell over in this universe, likely a side effect of being rather infatuated with the idea of being able to hold Corey in her hand given that she's grown up under entirely different societal circumstances than in Omega. But yeah, she definitely sees "things we enjoy doing together" and runs with it to the point where she just kind of heavily insists he do these things with her 'cause he enjoys doing them anyway so why would he mind doing them more? She doesn't quite realize how her general eagerness and assertiveness translate more into a very light dominance at this kind of scale differential.
I'm glad you enjoyed this little peek at them elsewhere. I enjoy writing them a fair bit, and I do hope to get to Contract again, especially if I need a cool-off of sorts from Consequences. Thanks for reading and reviewing my little experiment.
[Report This]Date: July 09 2014 1:57 PM Title: Cut Short
Something tells me that sleepovers and sharing her brother with her friends wasn't on the approved list of activities. That's pretty irresponsible, after all.
Author's Response:
Nah, Abby is pretty much giving her tacit permission to either have a sleepover or take part in one with her line about calling Kayla if she chooses to stay at home. Besides, those friends Melody and Jenna. The only thing Corey has coming to him is an excessive amount of doting :P
[Report This]Date: July 09 2014 9:34 AM Title: Cut Short
*sheepishly lowers anti-shoe sign and extinguishes burning Ackbar effigy*
This isn't what it looks like.
Author's Response:
What DOES it look like, then? B|