[Report This]Date: February 16 2015 3:47 PM Title: Intro
Good character establishment. Kyra's sassy attitude comes out clearly, and the father seems disarmed when dealing with a fiery teenage girl. It's unfortunate they don't seem to have any warm moments of friendliness, but I guess this is setting up what comes next. Very well written, nice pace.
[Report This]Date: September 08 2014 12:25 AM Title: Intro
Though the ending is a little rush, this is still a very very great story I've ever read. The detail of breast feeding is amazing! Just don't want it to be ended, because it has became part of my life to read it. Have you ever read Adobeman10's Tweaky Tuesday? It's just like a companion piece of yours. Just it's mother being transferee into infant instead of father. Both stories are my favorite. Hope we can read your new story very soon!
Author's Response:
That's great to hear! It's nice to read reviews like this. And no, I'd never seen or heard of that story until you mentioned it -- I've been reading it some lately, and I have to say it's pretty great! Surprisingly close in a lot of ways to my story. And I never seriously considered doing two female characters instead of a male and female before, but after reading it I'm thinking about possibly doing a mother-daughter story of a similar theme (We'll see, though).
Do you know of any other stories out there that are similar to mine and Tweaky Tuesday? I'll send you an email if you care to respond that way. Always looking to find more stories I'll like.
[Report This]Date: September 07 2014 11:13 PM Title: Intro
The ending felt rushed and lacked any insight into the reasons why his daughter stole everything from him. Why on earth would a teenage girl want to saddle herself with a baby? Especially one that will never grow up? For what it is I suppose this is a good story, but not to my liking. I was hoping for a big reveal like in "Pariah". I wasn't too crazy about that ending either, but it made more sense then this one. I give this story a "meh".
Author's Response:
Fair enough. I think I've covered my response in other reviews, so I won't repeat it here. But anyways, thanks for reading.
Date: September 07 2014 8:50 PM Title: Intro
This story was really interesting to read from start to finish but painful at the same time just from the over the top horrible luck the befell James any way it was good story but the ending doesn't describe what Kyra's motivations for doing this was or if it did i didn't see. Last complain though is more personal since I was hoping for a chapter that revealed to mrs. Adams that James was telling the truth the whole time and that the babysitter lied about the list. Again just personal problem. But yeah great story
Author's Response:
Yeah, I decided not to have Amy ever find out the truth because I wanted to drive home the point that he's helpless and that no one takes him seriously enough at his small size to hear him out or give him any benefit of the doubt anymore -- they all get to the point where they assume he's just plain naughty and immature and so they never look any further (a big part of the size fetish theme, for me). So anything to upset this order of things (e.g. Amy finding out the truth from elsewhere) would be counter to that, so I avoided that.
On a similar note, personally I liked how Kyra had no specific motivation to do what she did to him throughout -- it amplifies his feeling of helplessness and unfairness that he feels towards the shrinking already. Plotwise, though, I can see how some might find it less than satisfying.
Anyway, thanks for reading!
[Report This]Date: September 03 2014 3:04 PM Title: Intro
James you are a sad, strange little man(toy story). Kyra is being nice and he goes and rocks the boat. He better take what he can get, and hopes she lets this one slide.
Author's Response:
Yep, he doesn't have a lot of options now, does he?
[Report This]Date: August 29 2014 1:40 AM Title: Intro
Putting all the torture for Jimmy aside...Im going to guess the only reason Kyra let all this happens is simply cause she is sadistic pure and simple. Reading the story from chapter one to now leads me to the only possible reasoning. She just like to hurt which gets her riled up. The other girl whose name I forgot just plain hates him which is open and shut case and now Amy who was the "nice" one turns out more devilish then Kyra and Sandra (name popped up).
Yet....if you think about it...Jimmy is also their crutch in some way. Anything bad happens...automatically blame Jimmy...I took a cookie from the cookie jar.....torture Jimmy till he passess out....you get my drift? Jimmy's shrinking is giving a thrill to all the girls in the story....a mother complex for Kyra with S&M. The same applies to Sandra and Amy as she is starting to explore it justifying it from her "betrayal" as she thinks. Heck even Suzi does the same thing but for child like behavior.
but enough of my rattling. Its a interesting story just too much humiliation even for me lol. I can sense the end game which I hope we can officially know why Kyra let all this happen. Im still hoping for that happy ending or even an ending where Kyra gets a Big "screw you" moment like Jimmy died or something. IF you could just give Kyra that one Screwed moment and I prolly could stomach the rest lol
Author's Response:
You're right about Kyra's motivations, I didn't give much reason for her to act like she does but it's just her nature and her being corrupted by basically unlimited power and freedom over him.
That's an interesting viewpoint on Jimmy being like a crutch to them. To be honest, I never really thought of it that way, but there's probably some truth in it. I do see Kyra (and Ms. Johnson too) as being mostly aware that he doesn't deserve what's come to him -- rather, they willingly blame him and act as if they think he's culpable for everything, even if they usually know better. It's really just Amy who has been duped by the other two into genuinely thinking he's a bad person and irresponsible, etc.
But yeah, even for Amy, I can see her willingly turning a blind eye to his actual actions now and simply assuming the worst of him no matter the situation, using him as a crutch as you said. Interesting point.
[Report This]Date: August 28 2014 7:18 PM Title: Intro
And so Amy went from one of my favorite characters in this story to the bottom of the bunch. Seriously, how does she find a way to make it seem like some great misfortune has befallen her and 'oh my dear friend betrayed me'!? How can she act like some that when Jimmy is the one who ACTUALLY has a life made in hell itself?
And the thing is that in real life there actually ARE people like this, who make themselves the victim no matter what the circumstamces! And then to put this guy who used to be her friend and has gone through hell into a deliberate life and death situation!? Seriously, if I was Jimmy id have offed myself a long time ago!
I have NO idea what keeps this guy going when essentially the whole world seems to hate him just for having a condition that is not in his control...And somehow I keep coming back to this story thinking things are gonna get better for him aaaannnd somehow they manage to get EVEN worse (I should know better by now).
Not that any of this is a criticism, quite the opposite. The fact that a story like this that makes my guts churn every time I read it has kept me coming back is a testament to how good your writting really is.
Author's Response:
Yeah, on this second read-through, I did note that Amy's reaction seemed a bit over-harsh considering the crime. It would have taken a lot of effort to go back and change it, though. And at least I enjoyed how much Kyra's corrupting influence has poisoned Amy as well; I see Kyra as a driving force for planting a seed of doubt in Amy's mind and then amplifying any little mistake he makes into something that'll make Amy doubt him even more, until finally she stops believing him altogether and starts despising him (even over things that weren't even his fault!). In retrospect, maybe I should have added more emotional attachment between James and Amy to begin with, like say they were once lovers or maybe long-time friends or something, to make her extreme reaction to his 'betrayal' of her trust make more sense.
Oh, but I should add, though, that a big part the story is how people think less of him specifically because he's smaller -- there's that implicit psychological side to how people treat him that I find most thrilling. Hopefully it's apparent that he never would have been treated this way if he were adult-sized. That's a key point to understanding why no one seems to truly care anymore about his feelings and don't feel remorse over punishing/tormenting him.
^ A lot of that wasn't directed at you so much as me just saying it in general. And I'm glad you can feel the gut-churning and still find yourself wanting to keep reading.
Date: August 28 2014 1:17 AM Title: Intro
A good shrinking over time story, only the reason why that insect did infect him from all the people in the city and nobody else isnt mentioned. But i think you dont really care that because of the fact that you ignored all the other possible sources of the shrinking curse (radiation and stuff).
However his daughter isnt really very smart, after all, her father is the only one who gives her the money to get all the stuff she seems to need so much (the house, clothings, food, school, car) but she doesnt care if he gets fired cause of her grounding him. Not to mention that she will end on the street after he looses his ability to be a real person in law.
Not really very well thought to the end.
Author's Response:
Haha, yeah, don't put too much thought into the shrinking mechanism. I just wanted something external that happened to him for no real reason, so I blithely picked 'insect bite' knowing that it didn't really matter, since anything else would be equally cheesy but would accomplish the same thing in the end.
As for Kyra, I think if we assume she'll be graduating high school pretty soon, and we know she basically has a job lined up at her dad's old work, then it seems plausible enough that she'll get by on what money her dad has saved up (which I think I mentioned somewhere was quite a bit, in stocks and stuff) until she can sustain herself with her job. Serves its purpose well enough, in my opinion. Sorry if you found it distracting.
Date: August 28 2014 12:15 AM Title: Intro
How much more can he take? I was hoping he would fall and sustain an injury that couldn't be glossed over. Maybe someone would show some genuine concern for him. It seems that no one cares about him anymore. All he has to look forward to is unending misery. All he gains from cooperating with them is not improved conditions, but a respite from worse treatment. He should just kill himself and get it over with. How much smalerl is he going to get? Will his youthening continue, or has that stopped and he's just getting smaller? Are we getting anywhere near the end? I'd really like to know what all his suffering is about. I've been asking the same question since chapter one with no clear answer. Why has Kyra done this to her loving father? Taken everything from him, even his friendships. She had the power to truly help him and denied it to him. She knows there's no reversal for his condition.
Despite some interesting plot points, this story continues to be more frustrating then anything else.
Author's Response:
There's no real reason for Kyra to treat him like this, other than just because she can. To me, the unexplained unfairness of it is what makes it erotic, actually. That, and the dehumanizing aspect of how everyone is treating him. To each his own, I guess.
I will say that there's only a couple chapters left in the story, though.
[Report This]Date: August 06 2014 3:22 PM Title: Intro
Great story so far, can't wait to see more.
Author's Response:
I wonder if your username is a coincidence, or triggered by this story. Either way, thanks for the review!
[Report This]Date: August 05 2014 4:39 PM Title: Intro
I love this story so much, it's at times so frustrating that it is brilliant and when it isn't frustrating I love it even more. It's like an addictive endless cycle which keeps me reading.
Also your writing is awesome, keep it up.
Author's Response:
Thanks!
Yeah, addictive endless cycle -- imagine how I feel after 200 hours writing it ... :P
Date: July 16 2014 5:17 PM Title: Intro
Damn. After that latest chapter, if I were the father I think I'd snap and either commit suicide or try to kill my daughter when I had a chance. I know that sounds extremely twisted, but given the circumstances of what has occured over the course of this story, I think a mental/emotional breaking point would be reached after all the abuse, humiliation, and punishment committed day after day. And now that the one friend he had left has turned against him, there appears to be no way out of the hellish existence he finds himself in. It seems pretty clear that Kyra has NO intention of letting any semblance of normalcy return after what she's done.
I'm guessing a tragic end (death or slavery of some kind) at the end of this story. That being said, it is very well written and antagonizingly addictive. It keeps the reader on edge.
Author's Response:
Glad you're still enjoying it. I'll admit I do enjoy creating a sense of total futility and helplessness, it's probably why I write such long stories since it keeps getting better and better for me (well, I do get a little burned out with it sometimes, like by the end of Pariah for example). But in general in my stories you won't often see things go better for a male character once they start going bad.
But this story will be winding down towards a conclusion relatively soon, so hang in there and, as always, thanks for reading and reviewing :).
Date: July 15 2014 9:09 PM Title: Intro
As you can tell reading all these comments I think you've just about reached people's limit for dramatic tension. We need to start seeing some kind of end game coming. Some insight into what Kyra is planning and why she's doing this to her own father. She's managed to take away everything from him and now finally his only friend. This is a well written story and I keep reading mainly to see what's going to happen next. Is this going to go the way of Pariah and he's going to have a bad end, or do you have something special in mind (hopefully something nice to compensate for all he's lost)?
Author's Response:
Yeah, I'll admit this story could have been shorter but I kept getting carried away with scenes (Actually, the story might have turned out even longer if the constant height change hadn't kept things moving along!). There's not a whole lot left now, though, just a handful of chapters to go.
Date: July 14 2014 9:37 AM Title: Intro
I have to say overall this is a good story. At first I loved it but then what started as discipline and become more like torture. But even though I don't think he deserves that much punishment I still keep tuning in to find out what happens next which is why this sorry is good. I just hope he someday has sine type of happy ending if possible.
Author's Response:
Thanks, I can't say whether or not you'll like the rest of it but stay tuned and thanks for reading :).
Date: July 14 2014 8:27 AM Title: Intro
Hello,,
it is really nice story I liked it . I hope you keep on and more humilation on jemmy. I enjoyed whole chapters and kyra role and has full control. 100% like it and it is my favorite story thanks.
Author's Response:
Thanks! Glad you like it. And yes, Jimmy will definitely continue to be humiliated :).
[Report This]Date: July 14 2014 12:20 AM Title: Intro
They say he's just a child yet they willingly try to abuse him. Theses women need help and james needs to run away and give kyra a scare that might make her change. Or maybe if he make the sacrifice and starts acting more like a real boy they'd be nicer.
Author's Response:
That's a good point about treating him like a child yet abusing him. It did cross my mind when rereading the story (i.e. if he's a child then he shouldn't be fully accountable for misbehaving and should be tolerated rather than abused, maybe). Anyway, I did go back and tweak the verbiage at the end of the previous chapter, but just a small change really. All I can say is that they maybe still implicitly acknowledge that he still has some non-childlike quality to him and so he shouldn't be exactly treated like one.
[Report This]Date: July 13 2014 11:27 PM Title: Intro
I'm also in agreement with the last few posts, while naturally this sort of gts isn't exactly my cup of tea the main difference I see between this story and Pariah is that Nick was an unlikeable bastard who received disproportionate retribution.
But what does it for me here is that you naturally sympathize with Jim and he's quite frankly a butt monkey being put through hell and there's hardly any struggle to speak of as far as him being able to effectively battle back. I could bear that if this was a short story, but for as long a story is this it's like watching an extended beatdown in a fight and I'm just waiting for the referee to call it off or someone to throw in the towel.
Don't get me wrong though this is still a great story with tremendous intricate detail especially for it being the first one you written.
Author's Response:
Yeah, like I just told the last reviewer, I probably could have reduced the amount of torment without hurting the plot progression. It always surprises me a bit though when I hear people sympathizing with my male characters (especially surprising when I heard that about Pariah but also here). All I think about is ways to humiliate the male characters in these stories, and it never crosses my mind to feel bad for them.
Not arguing with you, though; it's just a personal prefence thing and I find it interesting to see people's reactions.
Anyway, thanks for reading.
Date: July 13 2014 10:47 PM Title: Intro
I agree...that was a real hard chapter to read. I like the slow shrink and everything. From the daughter getting bigger...the friends....and Im assuming the the young girl will tower over him soon enough, but wow that left a burn in my stomach. It make me wish for him to just get away or to even die just so Kyra can get a ultimate burn of loosing a father and in her twisted mind a son. At least in Pariah the man sorta had a choice and was too....enticed to follow logic. This man is getting the shit list everyday. I wont be surprised if Kyra planned this for some twisted logic she has.
all in all I pray for a happy day and a happy ending for him. I dont think I can take another Pariah ending.
Author's Response:
Yeah, I never intended the story to go on this long originally, but I found out that I didn't want to see it end so I just kept thinking up new ways to torment him and putting them in. From a plot perspective, though, I can see how it might come across as a little much.
[Report This]Date: July 13 2014 10:37 PM Title: Intro
Well if all hope is gone, then maybe its time to dare Kyra to do her worse and verify that she doesn't give a shit about you. That's been the hardest part to swallow in this story. Does she dislike him so badly to treat him this way. I'm now wondering if this story is going to be like your last one. The woman comes out practically unscathed (and improved) while the guy is completely ruined, if not dead. I'm going to cross my fingers and hope for some kind of turn around to end the torture. The story continues to be compelling and a good read, though not my cup of tea as far as the fetish goes ( I like nice).
Author's Response:
I'll admit, I didn't put much thought when writing this story as to why Kyra would treat him this badly. Mostly just for her own amusement, I guess. But thanks for reading, anyway.
Date: July 12 2014 2:49 AM Title: Intro
Great storya281;
I want you to write a story of a big, violent father slowly shrinking and little, weak daughter slowly growinga281;
Author's Response:
Thanks!
I've had a few story ideas kind of like that, but we'll see if I ever choose to write one of them. I usually prefer writing about innocent guys being placed in unfortunate/unjust circumstances, but having a guy deserve what's coming to him might be a possibility as well.