Reviewer: SpookyTaco Signed [Report This]
Date: April 23 2014 1:59 PM Title: Ch. 21 Pant-Load

In response to your comment, the next update — Splinter’s Edge: Perspective — is posted at www.tgstorytime.com (due to content).

I assume many from this forum will not be interested in that story.

Once I finish with Perspective and continue with Splinter's Edge main storyline, I'll summarize the important 'lesson' Tristan learns so readers who wish to avoid TG content can do so.

As for your comment on searching for a descriptive adjective, usually it's sufficient to just describe in detail the events that are occurring, without trying to find an appropriate simile. Sometimes I've fallen into that trap, creating 'purple' prose.

Author's Response:

I had to google 'P-prose'.  Whoa, came severely close to that in more than one chapter- Ha!  Thanks 4 bringing that to my attention Spooky!  You're tips have really helped me out.  Hopefully, I'll continue to improve even more...  Next story is in progress.  So, I sure hope you'll be reviewing it too!

Thanks Man.  MNW85'

Reviewer: SpookyTaco Signed [Report This]
Date: April 22 2014 7:51 PM Title: Ch. 21 Pant-Load

Poor Bobby, things couldn't get much worse for him I'd imagine.

One recommendation I have is to avoid overusing the same word (if it is unusual) in the same chapter like sluiceway/sluice-way.

Author's Response:

Yeah, I know what you mean.  A good word can lose it's effectiveness if used too much.  Constantly searching for a fitting, yet unusually descriptive adjective can be a real puzzler sometimes.  When you stumble across one that definitely 'fits',  sometimes it's hard to resist over-using it... and, more than once can prove to be most detrimental to the entire story.

Thanks for the imput/review. 

btw,- I am anxously awaiting your next update....can't wait to see what happens next with Tristan!