[Report This]Date: May 20 2016 5:42 AM Title: Conniption
Well, if it's seriousness you want, I'll do my best.
These last three chapters have truly been a turning point. What was initially a very detailed masturbatory fantasy with some elements of morbid comedy has become suitably dramatic. Especially, with regard to Jack's PTSD in chapters 18 and 19. And Caitlin's light switch-like alternation between compassionate lucidity and full-fledged sociopathic hostility.
Makes me wonder how much of this tendency is a side-effect of the titular chemical and how much is congenital.
Author's Response:
Awesome, thank you! Can't get enough of this feedback - you're all amazing!
Totally spot-on about the masturbatory fantasy - Caitlin is the physical embodiment of that. She's the thing that inhabits every macrophile's dreams, but could easily become a nightmare if pushed to a logical conclusion. As I've mentioned, that's exactly what she means to me, I know nobody anything like Caitlin in real life, and if I did, I'd be utterly conflicted about her. Fantasy is safe, reality isn't - that's what I'm exploring with her - Jack's fantasy versus reality - my own fantasy versus reality.
Caitlin's light-switch stuff is a way of creating conflicting feelings within Jack. If she was just 100% evil and, let's say, straight-up broke his legs, used him to pleasure her, then stuffed him in a cage and kept him as a pet, 1 - I'd write myself into a big corner, 2 - there would be no intrigue at all, she's evil - tick, 3 - he would, in my opinion, lose all latent feelings of attraction towards her very quickly, so instead of retaining the occasional feeling of 'if only she wasn't so cruel' around her, it would be more 'I would rather be dead than suffer any more'. In terms of an explanation as to why she's like that, other than because I've written her like that for selfish, living-out-your-fucked-up-fantasy reasons, there are a few factors which may come to light in future chapters, and nature, nurture, her wealthy father and experimental GH-X2 will all feature prominently.
Date: May 18 2016 11:33 AM Title: Conniption
Ooo! Conflict! You seem to have found a decent balance of chapters for tone, sexy stuff and conflict here.
Gotta say, I was sad to leave Nice Caitlin for Nasty Caitlin, as it was very endearing to see her so comforting for once - but then, I probably wouldn't be reading if that was all there was to the character!
Author's Response:
Nasty Caitlin isn't 100% nasty... otherwise Jack's head would probably be facing the wrong way. Amber, on the other hand, now there's something scary... Nice Caitlin was thought extinct for many years - it's highly unlikely anyone else has even seen so much as a fleeting glance of this rare, majestic animal.
In all seriousness, Caitlin has enormous issues (geddit...) but she is still a human female, and she has needs, be they sexual ones, recreational ones, or emotional ones.
Date: May 17 2016 7:20 PM Title: Conniption
Interesting to see Caitlin in a temporary state of weakness. She still comes off as a stone cold bitch in general, but not such a cardboard cutout type of villain now. I'm sure the next chapter is going to be hell on earth for Jack.
Kind of wondering for how long Jack is going to end up in captivity. This basically has to end at some point for him. Either he dies in Caitlin's clutches, is released, escapes (unlikely I know), or maybe becomes brainwashed into staying Caitlin's boytoy forever. Those seem the most logical conclusions to his conundrum, but maybe you have something altogether different planned.
Also wondering if Penny might make an appearance soon in coming chapters. Her sympathetic nature serves as a nice counterweight to Caitlin's malice. It would kind of be a shame for her to simply be out of the story altogether. That being said, the story is intriguing in its own way (if a bit sadistic at times). Looking forward to more.
Author's Response:
Deffo stone cold. It's not her fault though, it's the just way she's... written (Jessica Rabbit style).
The answers to your questions may well have been answered in the next chapters, suffice it to say, your thoughts are/were very much along the right track.
[Report This]Date: May 17 2016 5:08 PM Title: Conniption
Yep, Jack triggered something. He made her she'd a tear and reveal that she had some concern for him.
In other words, Jack outplayed Caitlin. Big Time. I mean, she had a loss of words and Jack took advantage of it.
Having been defeated once finally, Caitlin feels embarrassed. She decides that this can never happen again and she establishes dominance again.
Jack's little victory doesn't last long as Caitlin ties him up and leaves him trapped waiting for Amber.
Will Amber show up before Caitlin? Of course, and I believe Amber will break Jack. And if Jack thought him being sexually assaulted by Caitlin was bad, then these next few chapters will make that feel like nothing.
I think Jack can maybe tip over the laundry basket. If something heavy is at the top, it actually helps because the weight can bring the basket down.
Well, Jack is in for a rough meeting with Amber. I can't wait for the next chapter!
Author's Response:
A small victory in a war he looks like losing, or something more significant? It took forever, but the longer he was able to withstand Caitlin, the more she let him in, without intending to.
Date: May 17 2016 3:36 PM Title: Conniption
Really Caitlin? "Teach him his place in the world" is the reason for all this? That seems WAY too simple a reason for doing all these things, you'd think a simple pounding would suffice, no?
Author's Response:
Perhaps she's trying to teach his place in the world, is underneath a giant woman? But yeah, you're damn right, that can't be the only reason... I get the feeling she's a big liar!