Reviews For uTopia
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Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 11 2013 9:00 AM Title: Amber – repopulation and delays.

Maybe amber will stop killing so many micros if kate tells her the truth? Great chapter, as much as I dont like amber and nicholes characters it really makes this story great being able to see it from multiple perspectives. Will be on the lookout for updates.



Author's Response: Well, Amber already seems to understand that she cannot continue to kill "so many" of them since they "reproduce" so slowly - do You really think she would even believe Kate if she explained it all? I mean.. some facts could make sense, but with their perception of the world - it would seem like one of... Well, Andrea explained it clearly.

As for "not liking them".. at least they're still better than the firsts, come on - cut them some slack :>

Reviewer: elite14 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 09 2013 8:22 PM Title: Intro - how it all came about.

i was thinking that nicole or amber may put some giant insects in kate´s cities, it would be cool!



Author's Response: Well, several problems for start - I don't think Kate would ever allow them to enter her chamber, there are no insects in the facility (high-tech decon and all), insects would die through dilation - they wouldn't have refraction wristcoms and even then the Service would quickly get rid of them (I mean, seriously - they aren't as small as in the AOTB, which You probably have in mind).

Thanks for the suggestion though - I also appreciate the idea :>

Reviewer: KazumaR1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 07 2013 10:37 AM Title: Kate – the new perspective.

Chapter 18:

This was a great chapter with Kate and her reverse giga transformation. The realization that the micro humans were people like her and that her size could affect their world in the most simplest of ways, even to the point where it restricts her greatly, was very good. It was a little impractical but the giant screen that allowed Kate to see the people she’s been interacting with up close so that each one could be personalized was a great idea. It really helped drive Kate’s new perspective of the world home. The problem now is how she’s going to keep herself from cracking under the burden of what she knows. Interacting with the other caretakers is just going to be even harder.

Oh yeah, don’t kill Gary. He’s the mainstay micro human this story needs :p

Chapter 19:

Well who know who must have did you know what if Nicole is already destroying her zones. Amber and Nicole are completely ignorant to Kate’s real feelings and it’s kind of amusing. It’s like Kate is the true adult among ignorant children. I wish Kate could have saved the humans in the container she had. Like pretend she was going to play with them in private and then bring them into her zone. But I guess with the stress she was under from just being with them it didn’t cross her mind.

The zone destruction didn’t really do anything for me. I guess that was the point but even if it had more detail and was “sexy” I probably would have been more pissed off at Nicole anyway or maybe not. More like this is awesome, but fuck you Nicole. Eh, I guess it wasn’t the interaction I wanted but within the context of the story it made sense. It did make me think that even if Nicole found out the truth it would make her worse. She already likes to control and manipulate things. What’s better than controlling the lives of millions? 

And again don't kill Gary.



Author's Response: I don't need to read a recap of the chapters, but thanks nonetheless :> It's still good to see that at least somebody understands what I was aiming for.

If You figure out something really creative, like how the story is going to end or such - that would be interesting (of course don't put that in a review, feel free to contact - I will keep track of who guessed tight first :>)

As for the screen - at least she has seen them, at least they are no longer "micros" for her, even despite that she has to call them that in the presence of others. I thought it was simple yet powerful, especially how she could clearly see the amplified image in contrast with "the dots" below it.

As for Gary.. I don't know... he's annoying, seriously! What about some replacement perhaps?

What made You think she is decimating her zones? Erica planned all this in ch17 already - have I suggested somehow that they were Nicole's? As for saving - that's the real tragedy of her situation... and it happened so fast. Not to mention that the tinies could hear the others talking - trying to "get away" was the only thing I thought they would do, Kate didn't prepare any trenches or plateaus...

The POV wasn't meant to be "sexy" - how could anyone in their right mind even consider such atrocity appealing in any way. That's also why I wasn't planning to repeat it later. In Nicole's defence - keep in mind that she does not really know what she is doing. The manipulative part - who knows?

The problem with micro interaction is that... well, I agree it is really impractical. Any attempt to.. I don't even know what they could want to do with the people, but it would still end badly. As Kate already noticed, killing people is the only thing they are good at...

And I have no idea where this unhealthy fixation on Gary somehow not dying is coming from - I already wrote he has some time left, that's better than billions already! Not to mention why him - and not Crawford for instance.. he's a cutey. Or Amy.

Reviewer: Rage Signed [Report This]
Date: June 07 2013 8:22 AM Title: Nicole – request and reunion.

good chapter. It's nice to see some 'interaction' with the cities. I know its done to death in the other stories on this site but I feel it would add to this story.



Author's Response: But isn't this enough for the 'city-play' topic? Surely there are many more variations that can be explored, but - especially at this size - it would all seem repetitive. Even here, I was rather focused on showing the POV with emotions and events that actually contribute to the story - rather than just empty documentary-style descriptions. I mean.. they are fun and all, but - "it's done to the death" indeed. Not to mention that I'm sure anybody who has gotten this far can surely imagine a common "plays" that must have been happening in other zones for decades now.

There will be some more "cruelty" and "violence", but I wasn't planning to describe a lot of details on what's happening under the character's feet. Do You think I should?

Of course the biggest problem with the "caretakers" "violence" - they don't see it this way, hence the quotes - is that littles stories would almost always be quick (as in "splat") and most of the girls perspective... well, is not very interesting either - how can one be passionate about crushing some dots aka "stupid micros"? Now of course it will be completely different when Kate turns evil, but until then...

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 01 2013 10:04 PM Title: Kate – the new perspective.

Cool update on my favorite giga, but I think you should stop giving ideas as to what your gonna do in the chapter end notes...Even if you dont plan to do what you say it still kind of give away intent, especially when you said this: (of course it's business as usual when she kills Gary, turns evil and all the rest of it). Dont give away that kind of info in the footnotes! Great update regardless!



Author's Response: But.. what makes You think this is what happens? I mean.. if we believed the notes, then Gary would have died at least six time by now, not no mention numerous other atrocities - I am actually trying to write them with complete disregard to what is planned for the next chapters. Just messing with some of You :>

And thanks!

Reviewer: Rage Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: May 31 2013 4:24 PM Title: Intro - how it all came about.

Really good stuff. compelling reading even if you disregard the readers potential....fetishes:D 

my only critisism is that you have yet to submit the next chapter!

 

 

 

 



Author's Response: Thanks! If you have any suggestions to deviations I may have missed - feel free to suggest the particulars. There's still some more planned, but I will be focusing increasingly on the story.

And the next chapter is on the way - I am still trying to figure several things, but it may end with pushing them to somewhere later... Either way, it should be up later today.

Reviewer: MrSirk Signed [Report This]
Date: May 29 2013 9:15 PM Title: Intro - how it all came about.

Hello this is not a review exactly but more of a response. I have visited this site numerous times and read a lot of it's stories and as a side effect most of there reviews never really feeling the need to review myself. For a time it went on like this until I stumbled across the insanely popular "My Marriage to a Giantess" story subsequently leading me to your most recent response to the story which was quite a bit larger than the standard fair. I was..surprised by the review and immediatley tracked down your previous ones even finding that the author was pleased by your words. Anyway this made me think about my own story that a submitted a few weeks prior and even though I had a basic ending to it in my mind I haven't really planned it all out but  now I am. I constantly re read my own stories before I write a new chapter and now I'm trying to put even more thought into it so I can not only tell a giantess story but a good story in general. Sorry for rambling on but I just wanted you to know that your review made me think....It made me think. WOW!

OH! I'm also following your story and let me say it is daunting. There is so much contant I am only up to chapter  4 but I must say you have created a very believable world so far and I might just submitt a review if I ever catch up.

So anyway yeah...that was pretty much it.



Author's Response: Well, You can always use the contact action on anybody (if You don't want to provide a working email, just a@b.com or just a random temp for any responses).

The problem with the second review of "My Marriage .." was that I used all the modest/neutral thoughts in the first one and only the things I really didn't like were left - which may have seemed very negative while I loved the beginning of MMtaG - as I tried to outline in the first, but that is another story - also quite literally, in fact :>

And I was hoping to inspire not only Thom to think, but also others (no only authors) who read it - I am happy, I reached at least You.

As for reviews and uTopia, I would love to get more constructive criticism on my own work as well (even if it is all negative) - so far it seems only gadget and Kazuma tried to explain their discontent with some chapters in more detail (and I appreciate it greatly). Also - You do not have to read the whole story before reviewing, I feel that it may be just as important to give some feedback on how one feels about a chapter while reading it rather than after the whole story (especially considering that it's already half the length of an average book...) - feel free to drop Your thoughts on a particular chapter that You may have read (just remember to use the review box under the chapter, not any other actions - I think they default to attach on ch1).

In hindsight I regret that have if I pointed out the problems I observed with MM earlier, perhaps it would have developed differently...

Reviewer: KazumaR1 Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: May 26 2013 4:56 PM Title: Amber – fun and regret.

I like how the micro humans became disillusioned with Amber and knew that she was going to kill them no matter what they did but I don’t like how quickly they trusted Nicole. It would have been interesting to see what Nicole would do if the micro humans saw through her façade of kindness and told her to “fuck off” like they did with Amber. Lisa’s sudden appearance in Amber’s zone was so random that even if you didn’t intend it I thought she destroyed that city just to spite her daughter. At least Amber knows how it feels to have her “micros” killed carelessly by another person without her permission, if nothing else.

But since Amber and Nicole aren’t that much more developed than they were in the earlier chapters, all the focus is on Kate because that is where the plot is. Now that Kate knows the micro humans were really shrunken people, I wonder how that is going to affects how she runs her zone, how she feels about her friends, and the others. Will she think they’re monsters? Hmm.

I knew Erica might have been the big bad. Gary might be safe for now in Kate’s zone but poor Rachel. It sucks she might die before we get to know any more about her. 

 



Author's Response: Well, the problem with not-trusting-Nicole is that when they were being terrorized by this monstrous giantess - I really felt that even a hint of salvation would convince them. I mean.. Nicole could just as well kill them, but "promised" them escape from that dreaded place - don't tell you you would have seen it coming. Amber was the only caretaker they have seen at all (it was an untrained zone, as I mentioned a couple times) and the only option for them would be that she must be some kind of exception - I mean, to immediately assume that everybody is evil? Regardless of how much more interesting it might be (and I see your point there :>), I am trying to keep the story consistent - it would be even more fun if the littles had wings and kept flying all over the place, but... Also - it would take another K words to get to the point where they could play with them...

Lisa.. yeah... in the previous plan it made a bit more sense - but now Amber and Nicole figured it out on their own - and even then random things do happen in the real world. But the real explanation was meant to be that it was a couple days after her graduation - the girls don't know it, but Lauren did recall how they had to give Lisa the gifts only minutes before the party - perhaps she was simply greedy (but yes, this part was not bluntly explained after the re-cut - only hinted (like.. sooo many things), I hoped a careful reader might pick it up though (but yeah.. I think I'm putting these kinds of things for myself in a couple years)) - does it seem that random? Also keep in mind all the complaining on Lisa from various folks... Maybe she cannot do better? Try looking for various little things - "What do you mean" and later surprise - staring at each other...

Well, the main reason I decided to keep them around (and thus this 3+1 split from the beginning) was to mix the Kate's discoveries and interludes with the descriptions of how they were raised to behave (phew, now I can at least write about it in notes/responses openly), which I hoped would really emphasize the significance of Kate's early realizations. And it is not as simple as that as Kate - even she noticed how little she knows and can do about her situation. She will need all the help she can get if she is to accomplish anything - which may include Gary, Crawford (he's a cutey), perhaps some mothers or even other girls? Who knows... Besides - the girls are changing too, just less than Kate... but come on - she had a lot of help.

And I think it should be fairly simple to notice already - the very idea for the beginning of the story is the "reverse-giga", whereas in most (almost all?) stories a character gets blown up, sometimes destroys some cities unaware of her situation, realizes what she is then plays gentle and/or playfully (gentle part also optional) and finally turns to full rampage - at which point there is nothing more left to add to the story, this one seems to.. well, you have probably seen it as well :>

The EE (evil erica) was supposed to be obvious by now - with all the mentions from different characters in earlier chapters.. only I think of it more like "the ultimate master of all-the-evil-in-the-universes and beyond" kind of bad. Easily shadowing all evil dictators and fascist/communist/democratic leaders alike.. seriously... "big bad"?

But.. um... I thought it should be obvious what is going to happen to Rachel...

Also - why 4 stars? Have I done something wrong? I did not notice much disappointment in the review :>

Reviewer: someguy1900 Signed [Report This]
Date: May 26 2013 1:24 AM Title: Interlude – search and find.

Kate is by far the most interesting IMHO. I have to agree with the previous reviewer. You made Rachel seem quite shallow with her POV section. I've lost some faith in her at this point.

I'm not much in to gentle but as I stated before you make this stuff interesting, hence I'm following it. Kate is in my mind the "gentlest" in that she's not sexually abusing her micros at this point. Doesn't matter about her past; to me I'm reading the "present" and she's not the one putting them on her nipples for play at present.

Idk. Not disappointed with Rachel... Just kinda bummed she seems equally as shallow once we got to see her up close. But I still have hope for Kate.

Author's Response: Well, obviously she is the most interesting one - since she had the most attention, with around 25k words of her and her littles perspectives versus Rachel's what, 4k? And half of that on the fun. I merely wanted to point out in response that the "unconditional" (as gadget suggested) part was groundless. Especially that she only started to care after the events in her zone. Additionally, in this chapter, I wanted to make Rachel's thoughts seem very sad - after more than a century of fruitless search for solutions, she has reasons to be disappointed - wouldn't You be? But the people seemed to enjoy it even though she blamed herself for "abusing" them - that sadness was in her thoughts, which are very subjective to the person and even the situation. Actions of the people (their eagerness and asking to take more of them) - should suggest that maybe it was not that bad. Lauren for instance did not care about her people much - and the biggest concern was the "drop in efficiency", the approach of her people were also different - more like a necessity. Now, I imagine those misunderstandings may be caused by the lack of POV from Rachel's people here - I wanted to point out their emotions in their actions since the POV would be highly repetitive. And knowing Your violent cravings, You were probably disappointed that Rachel did not kill them all :>

I do not want to comment the "shallow" part - hopefully it may change in the next several chapters (if she somehow survives, that is - no wait, it was Gary that dies, yeah - never mind then), but there will still be missing pieces - if I wanted to describe every character properly, I would have to write a book about each and every single one of them... even Kate is barely explained - while we see how she thinks now, we have hardly any details on her past, but yes - it is not the point, that is why I am focusing on the present.

Also.. keep in mind that Kate has not been abusing them so far - who knows what could have happened in a couple decades...

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed [Report This]
Date: May 25 2013 5:20 AM Title: Interlude – search and find.

*SPOILERS AHEAD*

 

 

Very good character Rachel is..She is definitely compassionate towards tiny people and is probably the most experienced character in this story yet...But at the same time shes a little twisted in that she's trying to find excuses to protect her ideal version of herself that cares about the micros unconditionally, while still using them to satisfy her lust. Id place her at #2 on my giga gentleness scale, with Kate being first (so far), and Lauren at third. Im very into the gentle stuff so Kates my favorite still and I like that shes super cutesy and a bit playful with her tone when talking to the tinies. Nice insight into the life of Gary and also that governor guy who obviously thinks of Kate as some kind of God that must be kept entertained and happy (which she kind of is). Nice chapter and I'll be looking forward to wherever you want to take this story next!

Is this ^ okay? I dont know why Ive never thought about possible spoilers, I always figured people would read the story first, before reading reviews but I shouldnt assume that.



Author's Response: Well, a LOT of misconceptions here.

Rachel not only understands what is going on but also cares about the people, the only person so far to exercise both - I would think she blames herself for everything rather than "trying to find excuses", especially how some people seem to enjoy it (wouldn't we all.. :>) - while other mothers seemed not to care much or even at all, while the kids.. well, they don't even know what they are doing - I hoped it should be obvious by now. Kate barely scratched the surface with her realizations - but I think You are probably trying to idealize her, given how young, "shy" and "cute" she may seem - but keep in mind how the other seconds recalled she used to "play with micros" together as well. I have no idea where You got the the "unconditionally" part from - she wondered just a couple chapters earlier (ch6?) why she was feeling guilty about "some damn micros". No offence, just... it seems you are reading a different story than the one I am writing :<

There is no point of having a "gentleness" scale or ranking - they are just... various caretakers behaving how I imagined they would given their experience, nature and understanding of the world - and their actions also change as they learn and live through more. Will Kate still be so mindful and reasonable when she calms down after her discoveries? Or maybe the next discussion with whoever changes her approach again? Who knows...

When it comes to Crawford, I fear that You may have misinterpreted the "maintain this very delicate mix of calmness, anxiety and emotion" part - and also I'd think the dialogue would suggest he was more annoyed by the situation ("liability", facepalm) rather than worshipping her or anything even close to that. After all, didn't "entertain her" sound like a pun after his explanations?

I usually read the whole chapter after the night to correct any missing pieces and try to make sure the overall tone and message matches my earlier intent. The ch13 felt this way as well - have I failed at it so badly? (yes - actually a question, I really need to know if I failed to communicate their ideas, emotions and the way how they think about the tinies)

And its fine - spoilers don't matter as long the review is on the proper chapter (like now).

Reviewer: elite14 Signed [Report This]
Date: May 22 2013 12:47 AM Title: Intro - how it all came about.

You can make any of the girls to play with tinies in her navel?



Author's Response: I suppose we could, I somehow haven't thought about that at all - but it is a great idea, at this scale will be really humbling. Thanks!

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: May 21 2013 3:56 PM Title: Intro - how it all came about.

I loved the new chapter, it was great insight into how Kate actually sees the micros and what she thinks of the other Caretakers. I love her character she is my ideal Giga, and she has emotions, patience, and love for her tinies, something that I wish would happen more often with Gigas. Anyway, I really like this story and a lot and every chapter is like christmas for me!



Author's Response: I am so happy to hear that - and hopefully the story will get even better, it just barely started moving forward after the introductions :>

Reviewer: KazumaR1 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: May 21 2013 10:50 AM Title: Kate – guilt and realizations.

I wonder if Kate would like opera’s too. Maybe even plays but it would still be audio-only. Either way, it’s a good way for her to interact with the micros without actually talking to them.  

Anyway it’s a good development for Kate. I didn’t think it was rushed. But I suspect this is going to cause problems for her since actually caring about micro’s is borderline looked down upon with the other caretakers sans a few.

I didn’t expect you to leave us on a cliff hanger. Gary’s probably a care taker that shrunk before the lock down like Rachel’s ex-husband did.

Finally you didn’t need to be so foreboding with Gary potentially dying >.< I hope Kate doesn’t have to scratch her ears or anything. 

 



Author's Response: I thought about that, but... even with (spoilers) it would be impractical for her to understand what is going on. Keep in mind that we have decades of being used to different aspects of culture - from internet and television to theatre, opera, ballet and more. The more abstract forms would take a very long time to catch on, music seems more "natural" - and even then I feel like I am already stretching it, but it feels emotional and at least feasible. If any paleoneuroscientist knowing much about the origins of music enjoyment is reading this, he/she could probably enlighten us, but otherwise...

Well, You did not have to spoil it for everybody... Fine, it was obvious.

I guess we will have to wait for him to tell us about that. And what husband? Lauren had a boyfriend, I do not recall giving away any other details on their marital status - is this another one of Your premonitions? :>
When it comes to Gary.. obviously You guessed wrong - or at least incorrectly, such simple explanation would be silly - how can You suspect me of coming up with a trivial reason like that to turn the story around... seriously, there must be something more going on than that and he should really tell Kate about it. Especially how at his current situation it does not seem like he has much choice... or has he! *dun dun DUN!!*

On the other hand I do not want to break my habit of killing all the named little people...

By the way - five stars from You.. I am honored!

Reviewer: someguy1900 Signed [Report This]
Date: May 20 2013 8:30 PM Title: Nicole - truce and plotting.

Kate is too much of a pushover. If she really cares about her micros she really should've told amber the F--- off and not been so level headed. Even if the zone and micros are "property" then amber still screwed up. Idk. It's hard to believe that Kate cares so much yet lets these other girls walk all over her.

Author's Response: Yes, explanations are coming (already long-planned, just struggling with... several things) - I hope Kate's thoughts will convince You, but please be sure to let me know if she still seems "too much" or "too little" of literally anything later - or just unbelievable about anything (after all, we have not found out her thoughts about this sudden "change" yet). Keep in mind that their lives are very different from ours and also young girls are.. well, also different (but have I gone too far with her earlier passiveness? it is too late to fix now, but I would love to know what You think) (and also.. I often struggle between what I "want" the characters to do at any moment - not only Kate - and what I "feel" the characters would do in a given situation - two completely different things, I assume You are speaking about the latter - just an unnecessary reminder to distinguish them)

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: May 20 2013 8:16 PM Title: Intro - how it all came about.

Im not gonna lie, I read your newest chapter this morning but I didn't wanna comment cuz I didnt wanna seem like a weirdo for commenting twice in a row...But I got over it, anyway I wanted to say that first of all this is probably like my second favorite story on this site at the moment, and thats saying a lot because I usually am not into Giga stuff. But they way there are multiple gigas each with personalities and ways of treating little people makes this story a blast to read! I especially like Kate and am looking forward to the next chapter with a passion, its her turn right?

Anyway, Im not too much of a fan of Nicole and Amber, I feel like their personalities are practically the same with minor differences, but it was still interesting because you showed Kate and how they see her from their perspectives and how their trying to figure her out. I hope their will be more interaction between micros and the gigas because I feel like their should be some key micro characters in this...however, any sort of personal interaction may be difficult because of how large the caretakers are in comparison; its my number one issue with gigas really. But, the other aspects of this story are what keep me pulled in despite that, so kudos to you, especially with this being your first story!



Author's Response: Looking over the script for the rest of the story - I hope You will not be disappointed :>

And yes, Kate is coming - but probably tomorrow (or Thursday, but keep Your fingers...), as even though I have the chapter already written down since yesterday - I feel the need to fine tune it and work on some elements.

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: May 19 2013 11:47 AM Title: Intro - how it all came about.

Very nice chapter of reflection and self examination for amber. Kate seemed to be holding back the first time amber casually killed her micros...has she gotten even more attached to them, so much so that when she remembers what amber did she explodes with rage. Something must have changed with Kate because while she was very angry about what happened before she was certainly willing to keep those feelings to herself...This story is really shaping up man, on of my favs at the moment for sure, keep going as you planned, its your story dude, dont let what the readers want dictate your story, im glad you think that way.



Author's Response: Thanks for all the warm words and yes, Kate chapter is coming (after Nicole) - I hope the pattern of "3 characters + interlude" has emerged by now and we will definitely see some thoughts on this seemingly sudden change.

Reviewer: KazumaR1 Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: May 18 2013 3:35 PM Title: Interlude – immaturity and manipulation.

Well, I tried to make Lauren seem somewhat compassionate as for the littles affairs - have I failed at that so badly?

Yes Lauren is compassionate when compared to Amber and Nicole. I did notice how she tries not to kill her micros and doesn’t force them to pleasure her. I do like how she finds what they’ve done to uTopia to be sickening. The other mother perspective I’m interested in seeing is Rachel, due to what you alluded to in Chapter 9.

I simply am trying (and probably failing miserably :( ) for this story to be exciting and gripping to read - and not just "oh well, another story, another crush/gentle play/whatever"

Heh. It’s really the strength of the story concept that makes it interesting. Most giga level stories are non-stop destruction and smut with girls that have paper thin personalities. Those types of stories have their place in the community but I haven’t read many giga level stories with a real plot, like this. I don’t know if I just sound too harsh during reviews. You’re doing pretty well for your first story. 

 



Author's Response: All those mentions of her throughout the recent chapters are to create this curiosity before we start seeing her actual actions - I wish to provide something more than "Oh, the story talks from her perspective so she must be important, right?", the current brief plan states:
12 - interlude - some of the rachel's story, (spoilers...)
(with first chapter, the 0, being the intro - just like any normal, programming-like numbering...)

I went through Your other reviews and I see that You are being very generous (with average ratings of what - 1 star? 1.5?) - I only hope I do not fail Your invested curiosity (just like so many other stories failed mine - but I think I learned from that a bit).

As for an interesting story - it takes time (and chapters, words, etc - with every pov deferring the really deep parts) to build up a proper desire to know the characters more, to see what they do, what happens to them - the reason I gave so many "allusions" in 9th, was simply because I was worried that at this awkward "still introductory" point, it may seem like a sort of repetitious, giga-rampage and I wanted to suggest there is something more to it, before everybody bore themselves to death with the descriptions...

Also - I tried contacting You two times now (first with the deleted review, second after Your previous review - with some questions) - um, is Your email up-to-date in prefs? Next time I'll have to add this question about contact in the story notes or somewhere like that (perhaps the story itself, some recurring nightmares of a character being unable to contact Kazumi - along the lines of "Oh will I ever find You again?"...), so... I know I'm selfish, but if You could please find a moment of Your time to advise me on a couple things - I'd love if You contacted me back with a working address (or just sent an email on theybyinfrom shift+2 gmail).

But anyway, back to the pov+10th.

Reviewer: gadgetmawombo Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: May 18 2013 2:59 PM Title: Intro - how it all came about.

I love how gentle lauren is with her micros, going as far as not force volunteers. But the awesome thing about her is that she has a way of thinking that makes sence and lets her see them as tiny people with hopes and dreams. Definitely loved her chapter and I hope to read more from her perspective!



Author's Response: Yes! That is exactly the point - but then of course, she is a mother - which means that she has memories and experience beyond the state they are currently in, stuck with speck-sized people. As for her perspective - if You think about it, You'll find that she is not that gentle (more like selfish-kind "careful enough not to spoil the fun" type - wait for the Real Gentles :> ).

Reviewer: KazumaR1 Signed [Report This]
Date: May 18 2013 9:21 AM Title: Interlude – immaturity and manipulation.

And thus, we learn that the world is much, much more complicated than just “women playing with micros” - how will it turn out? Stay tuned for more

It’s easy to believe the world was simply women playing with micros is because aside from Kate’s chapter and the first part of chapter 5, you’ve used all the other chapters to show the “caretakers” treating the micro humans with complete disregard for their lives, treating them as slaves, imposing barbaric rules upon them, and killing them in cruel ways for simple entertainment.  

The politics of the caretakers have not been gone into depth yet. What is the 3/5th rule? How did one woman become the defacto leader among the original 5? It’s nice to see the insight of a mother but it was still just allusions to how their politics work and the animosity “caretakers” have toward each other and how they see their own children as pawns in a grand game not explained yet.

 I only know how the situation excites me a bit – especially imagining the “gratification” from the littles perspective – but I think it should be obvious and I do not need to necessarily pov it...?

You’ve been saying that we need to use our imagination to pretend how the micro humans see things from their perspective. I’m going to say this right now: I feel that is a huge cop out. You clearly can write from the micro human’s perspective. A giga giantess story primarily from the view point of the giga giantess is boring. A giga giantess is so huge that her perspective on human scale objects is very simple and leaves much to be desired. Telling people to use their imagination is a lazy way of saying you don’t want to write from a human perspective.

Personally chapter 5 is still the best chapter because it gave the most insight to how the zones work from a human perspective. As stated in the story, Kate and the others were barely educated on the inner workings of the zones and their view point is not reliable. I don’t really care if the main micro characters you make are killed in the very same chapter they’re introduced. At least they fill in the many empty blanks missing from the giantess view point.

I would like to see a recurring micro character at least interacting with Kate so she can learn more about how her own zone works. That could have been Adam if he wasn’t killed. 



Author's Response: More details to come, no worries - remember that all chapters so far were from the perspective of their children. Look, if I explained everything from the very start it would have really seemed like a documentary...

With their graduation it seems some of them may be slowly realizing there may be something more to it, but they are still bound to how they were raised. I understand that this lack of information may be frustrating - and believe me, I'd love to just write everything down and publish the remaining 45 chapters... but it takes time!

I could explain some of those things more clearly right now, but the story is about the characters finding out about them rather than "deus ex machina" providing all the solutions - not to mention the other considerations (pointed out in this chapter, details planned as well) which made even the more considerate mothers being unable to tell them everything - and are you looking how the book ends to spoil it's contents? Me neither...

For the POV - you are right, laziness is no excuse... I'll try to add some micro pov to the chapter just before adding a new one (and write about it in the pre-notes), so everybody could go back and see their view.

Well, I tried to make Lauren seem somewhat compassionate as for the littles affairs - have I failed at that so badly? But yes, the girls are so far simply unaware of their actions - so far.

Ugh, I felt that some of those characters may have been overdone for side-intrusion... apparently too many details about his life, plans and dreams died with him which leaves (at least some) Readers looking for closure - let me assure You, his death was not pointless - and it will influence the story further (at least twice with the current plan).

I simply am trying (and probably failing miserably :( ) for this story to be exciting and gripping to read - and not just "oh well, another story, another crush/gentle play/whatever"

Maybe I gave away too much with 9th... I can only hope that my promise of explanations lurking later will be enough to settle Your craving for more - for now at lears.

Please contact/review again if You feel that I misunderstood, missed, ignored or lessened any of Your points, I value everyone's opinion greatly and wish to make it help the story be better. (so if its already awful - it could become barely bad)

And finally - I had to delete your other review (sorry - it was attached to 1st chapter and had spoilers for deaths), please just repost your review on the 5th or so or contact me if you forgot it's contents.

Reviewer: KazumaR1 Signed [Report This]
Date: May 16 2013 11:25 AM Title: Nicole – betrayal and vengeance.

Argh your preference for telling rather than showing what is happening in the story using descriptive POV’s from both sides is making this story hard to read. The POV from the micro humans was actually pretty good but when it comes to the giantesses it just feels too impersonal. It’s like I’m reading a documentary rather than a story. I do like the concept behind this world your writing style makes it hard to get into.

As for the story itself, I think humanity is doomed. The way you write most of the girls makes them appear too immature to cultivate a civilization. I mean having a party in a populated zone? Really? Yeesh. 

 



Author's Response: Well, that was the point - most of the "Caretakers" do not perceive the "micros" as people, why would they "experience" it as anything else than just some fun? (You can always imagine how the little people must feel, though, especially after 5 - I hope I gave enough thoughts on the topic there) As for the doomed/immature part - remember it was the mothers idea for graduation parties like that (and more details about that will come as well, just when I finish struggling with the next two chapters), but I can see You already got the sort of impression I was aiming for at the very beginning of the story (40k words, I know, shush) - and of course keep reading, I hope it will get much, much more interesting :)

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