Reviews For Trials
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Reviewer: Flaming_Heart Signed [Report This]
Date: September 06 2013 10:58 PM Title: Chapter 19: Morning

Ramsey and Kiri are reunited, I like their chemistr.

Nice chapter though can't for more since the just got into the arena, also have stronger competition.

 

Reviewer: Story smith Signed [Report This]
Date: September 06 2013 1:30 PM Title: Chapter 19: Morning

I like your story my friend but i feel like giving you a few suggestions :
1. The stereotype for mystical forest is that the underbrush and plant life are alive and kills everyone. Though this is your story I ask you to please think outside the box. What make a story good arewhat the readers don't see comming. Ask your self what kind of creatures would give even amazons trouble? Something that would make them rely on their smaller partner.

2. Though the ideal of the world is strength isn't everything there are times when might is the the only thing one can rely on. Sometimes savage brute strength saves the day.

3. There is more than one type of strength. every amazon boast their physical superiority over people but what about intellengence? The only amazon is I feel is well versed in stragaties is Ramsey's old teacher. Show some of the amazon's other strengths and skill that none of their fellows can master give each amizonian contestant their own style.

Sorry if you feel as if I'm forcing my way on your story but this is how I feel....and....you don't really have to listen to me. Anyway can't wait till your next chapter

Author's Response:

Wow! Thanks for these suggestions. The first one has been the idea all along. I've been trying to make the forest dangerous with the inclusion of the razor backs and the rage beast all the way back in the second chapter. Maybe I need to make that more apparent. The last two suggestions are where the meat is I try to make each team diffrent so it's only natural that they have different skill sets. I'll have a lot of thinking to do before I write the next chapter. If you have anymore suggestions I'm open to them and that goes for anyone.

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