[Report This]Date: May 07 2022 5:04 PM Title: Chapter 6 Tom Alone
Wow this is just getting better and better. You have me right where you want me as a reader. Much like Hinba with Tom.
The suspense is killing me, the two of them have such good chemistry together it would be so painfull if she ended up eating him at the end despite all of the adventures they are going through and how the two of them are exploring their feelings through her powers.
When it comes to the stone, if I was Tom I would be tempted, but its not like I've been properly trained on how to use it. The best thing will probably be to just come clean to Hinba and hope she appreciates it.
Staying on her good side seems like the only course of action.
Its interesting, too that the naga broached the subject of life as a pet. Maybe she's seen Hinba do that before. Maybe she thinks I'll of Hinba for something she's seen her do before. Personally before she said that I was thinking that's Tom's third and best hope beyond being eaten alive, or having his soul consumed. Spending time with a powerful beauty like Hinba would be amazing for anyone reading this story I'm sure, and maybe she can be nice as long as he's a good boy.
It would make her seem incredibly ruthless if she's able to get to know him so intimately through her powers and just eat him after that. Maybe that makes his soul feed her more though, we just dont know what her demon kind are really capable of.
[Report This]Date: May 07 2022 2:59 PM Title: Chapter 6 Tom Alone
This is an interesting story that is somehow balanced in between the knife's edge of gentle and cruel. You pull it off spectacularly. Himba is hard to get a read on, yet this is not due to plot or personality contradictions, but because you have the reader quite aware that she's hiding parts of her intentions, or straight up lying. Of course, this does make her a rather frustrating character (in a good way) since she doesn't like it when Tom tries deceiving her.
And speaking of Tom, he's the reason why this entire story works. The tiny character in these size stories is the one that usually has the ball dropped on them, even in some of the better written stories. Tom is investigative, noticing small details. He's cool, even snarky under pressure, and from the katana scene, he has no problems taking his own life if it grants him a strategic victory. On the other hand, he's only human, and there are times where his frustration at his hopeless situation clouds his judgement. He is a complete character that's easy to root for, which makes this story all more engaging, no matter if Tom triumphs in a way, or Himba gets her meal in the end.
Overall, writing and characterization are top-notch. Only makes me wanting more.
Author's Response:
Holy cow, thank you so much! Yeah I had the same gripe about the tiny role as well. I really went into the venture wanting to make him something more than a blank slate beta that the reader could just self-insert. Balancing gentle and cruel, willing and unwilling were also huge inspirations. You gotta tell me what you think once you've read the whole thing,
[Report This]Date: May 07 2022 5:32 AM Title: Chapter 6 Tom Alone
I'm having a difficult time getting any sort of read on Hinba. Well, that's not quite true, since the correct read might be the straightforward one: she really is just a sadistic, cruel demon who wants to eat Tom's soul (whatever that actually entails).
I'm really, really hoping that's not the case, however. There have been hints that there's more then meets the eye regarding her. I'm not saying she's gonna end up being some great person, but there's still a chance that she might not be the monster she appears to be. It would be nice to see Tom get, if not a happy ending, at least an ending that's not awful.
Tom should probably be deeply suspicious of the stone he just got. Almost every single attempt at deception or manipulation has ended terribly for him so far, you'd think he'd learn his lesson at some point.
Author's Response:
Thanks for the review. Hopefully you enjoyed the ending. I'm not going to spoil anything if you haven't got a chance to see it, but I would love to hear your thought after having the "full picture."