Shrinking Really Small
By: Goldenbane

Mark Rummaged through the refrigerator looking desperately for something to eat.
“Let’s see...protein bar, no. Slimfast milkshakes, no. Tofu yum yum treats....HELL no! Geez, doesn’t that woman eat anything that tastes even remotely good??” he growled. The woman he was thinking about was his roommate, Julie. He’d been introduced to her a few weeks ago by his goofy cousin. They hit it off rather well, but he could never get along with her bestest friend in the whole world...Kelly.

Kelly was a chemist, a genius in her field, which was that of weight loss lotions and formulas for women. She and Mark would bitch, moan, and complain to each other so much, that passers-by would ask Julie if they were married! Unbeknownst to Mark, Kelly had asked Julie to store her latest lotion in her refrigerator. It was designed to take inches off the waistline!

As Mark fumbled around, trying to crank up the Weird Al Yankavich music playing on his boom box, he grabbed a jar containing a strange glowing substance! (Uh oh!!) He unscrewed the lid, and guzzled down the entire thing. Within seconds his stomach began to twist...his throat started to ache and burn...he knew what he’d drank! That’s right...”Richard’s Are You Nuts or Just Plain Stupid?” hot sauce!

“YEEARGH! AAAAAHHHHH! OOOOOOOHHHHH!! It’s so hot, it’s so hot! I’m burning up! ARGH!” he cried, running around the kitchen in circles, fanning his flaming mouth. He rushed back to the refrigerator and grabbed a strange box! (Don’t do it Mark!) He quickly opened it and tossed the stuff it held, into his mouth. He wanted to puke...it was the dead flies he had caught for his pet tarantula, Fuzzy! Once more he dug through the refrigerator, and pulled out another jar. He carefully examined it this time...it was some weirdo green slime. He figured he had already ruined himself enough...what the hell....and quickly took a big gulp.

“Holy cow! This stuff is fantastic! I wonder what it is?” he thought to himself realizing the burning sensation and the icky sensation had gone away. At that moment Julie came stomping through the door from her job as a secretary at Mattel toys. She gasped in horror as Mark finished the last gulp. “Hey Julie! I gotta tell ya, this green crap is awesome! What’s it called?”

“Um, ‘Kelly’s Wonder Weight loss cream’, and you just drank it!!” she responded rolling her eyes angrily.

“Cool, I could stand to loose a few pounds!” Mark chuckled, hook shotting the empty jar into the trash can.

“Mark, that was Kelly’s only sample, other than the stuff she tried on some rats! What am I gonna tell her?” Julie stammered.

“Tell her she’s a bitch, and a slut, and that you don’t want to be friends with her anymore.” Mark answered sincerely.

“Why on Earth would I tell her THAT?”

“Because I think she’s a bitch, and a slut, and I wish you didn’t want to be friends with her anymore...” Mark replied, plopping himself down on the recliner in the tv room, and turning to his favorite soap opera, “Passions.” Julie sighed and followed him in and laid on the couch. Mark wasn’t sure which was more entertaining...the show, or Julie trying to kick her shoes off (which she’d forgotten to untie). Julie absolutely HATED wearing socks, except nylons (she liked the silky feel to them) this made her feet stink very badly in her shoes, without any socks to absorb the sweat. She took good care of them though, always putting on lotion, powder, and making sure her toe nails were painted perfectly. Once she had her shoes removed, she flexed her toes happily, and giggled as Mark held his nose and scooted away from her smelly tootsies.

“So what episode is this?” she asked sweetly.

“It’s the one where Ethan and Theresa battle with fate, Tabitha and her sidekick Timmy use magic to try to keep Miguel and Charity apart, TC bitches about Julian Crane, and Chad tries to find his parents.” Mark explained. Suddenly the room started to twirl around, and he felt very dizzy. He thought he felt the recliner expand from under him, so he turned to Julie. “Hey, does this chair look bigger to you?”

“No, the chair looks fine.” she answered, watching the program intently. Mark became felt really bad, and the room spun around faster, his clothes got bigger...soon he was merely 5 inches in height! He gasped at his new size and cried out to Julie.

“I’ve shrank! I asked you if anything was wrong, why didn’t you tell me the truth?” he whined.

“You asked about the recliner, you didn’t say anything about yourself!” Julie frowned, leaping over to the chair, and checking on her friend.

Mark pulled up his shirt, and hid his naked body from the giantess. She smiled, a bit embarrassed at his nakedness, and quickly tore at the shirt so he could rap himself in it. Mark folded the torn piece into a make-shift toga. “BEHOLD, mighty Cesar in all his glory!!” Mark cried out, flexing his minuscule muscles. The toga promptly fell off, causing Julie to hide her mouth as she laughed hysterically. “Damn toga!” Mark snarled, quickly pulling it up, and trying once more to look regal.

Before another word could be spoken, there was a loud knock at the front door. Julie went over to open it, and Kelly burst in! The 2 women laughed at the sight of one another and hugged adoringly. They danced about in a little circle, and kissed each others cheeks like those weird foreign guys do to the President of the USA all the time. “Julie! I am so damn happy I caught you at home! Listen, don’t drink any of that lotion stuff. I found out it shrinks stuff!”

“Really? Now you tell us?” Mark stated, walking over to the huge women, putting his hands on his hips.

“Oh my god! What a perfect end to a perfect day! Hey Mark, did you get a new haircut? I think they took a little too much off the top! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!” the evil Kelly joked.

“YOU did this to me! ARGH!! I will destroy you!” the humiliated tiny man blurted out, charging Kelly’s sandled feet, biting and clawing.

“HEY HEY HEY! Watch the toes, ok? I just had them painted, and they still require a few hours to dry!” she warned to the pissed little dude.

“Ok, no problem!” Mark shouted, delivering a thunderous karate chop to the side of Kelly’s enormous foot. “Hi yah!”

“OUCH! You’re gonna feel that one in the morning!” Julie joked.

“Yeah, but...ouch... his puny fists...oof... sure feel good...ow.... against my achy feet!” Kelly exclaimed

The 2 giantesses watched patiently as Mark beat the living hell out of Kelly’s toes. Finally Mark tired out and collapsed upon the floor. “Finished?” Kelly finally asked.

“Ugh! Y...yeah...I think so!” he gasped, wiping the sweat off his brow and giving a thumbs up sign.

“Ok, here’s the deal, that green slime makes things shrink and there is no cure.”

“Ooooh, that’s bad!” Mark frowned

“BUT, it makes a great frozen yogurt!” Kelly continued.

“That’s good!” Mark smiled.

“The frozen yogurt also makes you shrink.”

“That’s bad.”

“BUT you get your choice of toppings!”

“That’s good!”

“The toppings contain potassium benzoate.” Mark frowned and cocked an eyebrow. “That’s bad.” Kelly explained.


“Is there a point to all this?” Julie finally asked.

“No, not really...hey, can we go somewhere private...you know, to talk and stuff?”

“Sure, we can go to my bedroom. Now Mark, you stay here, ok?”

“Uh...I don’t know! I have SO many places I have to be...” Mark joked. Julie smiled and lead Kelly to her room. She closed the door, as Kelly took a seat on her bed.

“Congratulations are in order Do you know what you’ve got? Mark is tiny and helpless now...he has to rely on you for EVERYTHING! You always told me about how you dream of being in control and taking your life back...well, start with Mark! Think of all the possibilities of having him around...wow, every woman should have a man like Mark...eh...a man Mark’s size!” Kelly chuckled to the excited Julie.

Outside Mark paced back and forth. Out of the corner of his eye he saw his spider! It must have escaped! The giant sized beast slowly stalked towards him and looked him right in the eye! Mark cried and dropped to his knees. “SO! This is how it’s going to end? Food for a tarantula? Ok Fuzzy, eat me! Eat your master...see if I care!” The creature looked at him like he was an idiot. Mark realized he wasn’t about to be destroyed and carefully petted it’s hairy head. The arachnid “purred” affectionately. Mark smiled and breathed a sigh of relief.

“You, my bulbas butted friend, shall serve as my faithful mount! I’m gonna have to do a lot of traveling, and it’d rock to have a steed.” He mounted the spider and braced himself. “TALLY HO, FUZZY! AWAY!!” The creature strutted about in it’s typical lazy manner, but it went where ever Mark directed it. “Sheesh, I could probably walk backwards faster than this! Ah well, it’s better than nothing.”

The two women exited from the room, just in time to see Mark grabbing hold of Fuzzy for dear life, as the icky beast walked up the wall. “Uh...ok....Julie, I’m going to the lab to make that...antidote now! *Wink wink*” Kelly laughed.

“You do that, and hurry!!” Mark screamed, as the spider walked along the ceiling. His grip began to loosen and he fell into Julie’s waiting hands. She raised him to her face and smiled mischievously. “Boy....I don’t like the looks of this!” Mark gulped. Julie reached up, and plucked his mount from the ceiling. She carefully dropped it into it’s glass house, and walked over to the coffee table, spilling mark out of her huge hand. She took a seat on the couch and proceeded to stare him down. Mark waited for her to say something, but she just sat there. Shrugging, he stared back. They sat this way for about 15 minutes, Julie trying to make herself look tall, powerful, and intimidating, while Mark was trying to win what he thought was a blinking contest.

“Listen up, there are a lot of things that are going to change around here!” Julie finally said.


“YES! I win the staring contest!” Mark chuckled gleefully after Julie blinked. Julie gazed at him, annoyed and placed her foot on the edge of the table so the ball and toes hung over Mark just a bit.

“There are a lot of new rules we need to go over, little man!” she said slowly.

“Ok...rule 1, there are NO rules! Heh heh heh!” Mark giggled. Julie growled and lifted her foot a little higher on the edge, so that her sole now towered over her puny roommate.

“RULE number 1: You won’t make stupid jokes while I’m talking! RULE number 2: I’m in charge...”

“Yeah right! Hahahahahahahaha! I think I should be in charge...I’ve got the looks..the brains..you’re just the brawn!” Mark laughed. Julie was furious! She slammed her foot next to mark, to show him how much bigger it was than he.

“I told you to quit making damn jokes! I’m serious!! Do you think I want to be your caretaker? You’re virtual slave? I’m the victim here, not you!”

“You’re my slave?? Exactly what is it you do for me?” Mark wondered, smiling.

“Well...I now have to pay your half of the rent!”

“I paid a year in advance and it’s only April, remember?”

“I have to cook and clean for you!”

“Who says? I can handle that shit myself!”

“I have to provide and safe environment!”

“You mean you aren’t gonna invite Kelly over anymore? YES!!! God, shrinking is the best thing that’s ever happened to me!” Mark cheered. Julie slammed her other foot onto the table, making sure that Mark was between them. She wiggled her toes and suddenly smiled at the hapless jokester.

“I’m going to give you a little project....you are going to be the caretaker of my feet! I demand that you rub them, lotion them, and powder them to my specifications each day...or else!”

“I am NOT rubbing your smelly old clod-hoppers!” Mark said defiantly, folding his arms and smiling up at his giantess mistress.

“Rub my feet, damn it or I’ll squash you like the bug you are!”


“So squash me like the bug I am! Who will be your little plaything then?”

“FINE! Don’t rub my beautiful feet, see if I care? I swear you’ll be sorry you didn’t do what I asked! I’m going to bed!” Julie cried, standing up.

“But it’s 3:00 in the afternoon!” Mark reasoned.

“Don’t you dare try and change the subject, Mark! Goodnight!!!” Julie stammered, stomping off to bed. Mark frowned and shrugged. Suddenly he heard sounds...lots of them, from all around! There were hundreds of pairs of eyes...all fixed on him! He cocked an eyebrow, wondering what was going to happen.

The next morning, Julie came out from her room and found Mark exhausted and sleeping on the floor. She looked his tiny body over, and decided to cover him with a blanket. She went to the mall to run some errands and ran into Kelly. The two friends talked and Julie told Kelly of how “mean” and “resistant” Mark had been the previous day.

“That little bastard! I’ll teach him to show respect!” Kelly snarled. “Look, we’ll finish up here and then we’ll go to your house! Wait until he sees me and what we’re going to do to him! I bet he’ll never be a jackass ever again!” The women came home, carrying a large bird cage...they gasped at what was happening! There were little vermin all around! Mice, rats, spiders, cockroaches, flies, bees, wasps, virtually everything! There was loud music playing, party lights flashing, and all the beasts seemed to be dancing and “gettin’ it on” around one object of attention...Mark! Upon seeing Julie and Kelly, Mark froze from doing the “robot” and quickly turned everything off. He fell to the ground, pretending to be asleep.

“YOU DICK! You had a party, and you didn’t invite me???” Julie screamed at him angrily.

“I didn’t think you would want to hang out with my new friends!” Mark smiled, trying to excuse himself. Julie reached down and picked him up. “Ugh!” he blurted out, before she began to shake him violently.

“I’m going to punish you once and for all! Whenever you disobey or just plain piss me off, you’re going into this cage, understand??” she yelled.

“I....I....I...Under...under....under....stand...stand...stand...” he squeaked as he was shook all about. Julie roared and tossed him in the cage, closed the door, and locked it. She set the cage down hard onto the coffee table and she and Kelly started to talk about this and that. “Sorry guys, we’re busted! Party’s over.” Mark called out to his friends. They quickly scurried away.

Mark quickly became bored in the cage and started to rattle the door. “Let me out, let me out!” he chanted, but Julie and Kelly continued to ignore him. Mark looked the door over, and then spit into his hands for better grip. He rubbed them together, then grabbed hold of the bars of the cage and started to grunt and squeal in an attempt to bend them apart. No good. He tried to pick the lock of the door with his tiny hand, but he’s was just a bit too big for that. He shoulder bashed against the door several times, punching it, kicking it, head butting it, etc. He even tried singing to get the girls to let him free....

“Silver bars! Silver bars!
It’s shrinking time in the city!
Wunk-a-dunk!
Hear them Clunk!
Hopefully soon I will grow!”

It was hopeless. Mark leaned his head against the door and started to cry. Suddenly...a creak! And another...and another! Without warning the entire wall around the cage door came loose and fell to the ground. Mark stepped forth...FREE! He inhaled deeply, watching the amazed giantesses, and let out a primordial cry of victory not heard since man’s shrunken caveman relatives first screamed it to their giantess friends: “Whoo hoo!”

Kelly stood up and checked all around the cage. SHE couldn’t even break any of the walls! “How....why...where...when????” she stammered, flabbergasted at his feat of strength. Mark flexed his pecks and growled jokingly.

“YEAH BABY!” he laughed in his best Austin Powers voice.

“Julie and I are STILL bigger than you, pig! You can’t do a damn thing to us...do you want to fight...I am positive I can whip up more of that shrinking stuff and make more tiny men!” Kelly challenged.

“Aw, I’m tiny and helpless! I couldn’t hurt a hair on your heads!” Mark smiled, a bit evil. “THEY however, are pissed you broke up our party...and want to kick your asses!” he giggled, as the thousands of vermin reappeared, squeaking, chirping, and growling threateningly.

Julie stood up and smiled down at Mark. “Um, how can we serve you?” she asked.

“I don’t really have a problem with the new rules! I was just giving you shit! Put your big ol’ bunions up here and let me massage em’ for you!” he laughed. Julie chuckled and happily placed her feet on the table, kicking the cage away. Mark rubbed and rubbed, making her moan with pleasure. Kelly could only sit and pout...jealous over Julie’s kind treatment, and wishing she’d treated Mark better. After he was finished, Mark looked at Kelly and a question came into his mind....”Hey Kelly, how did you know that your slime stuff makes into a great frozen yogurt?”

“Easy. I used to be 60 feet tall!!” she laughed!

The End :)